Routines

At work this week, I was explaining to a coworker how much I need routines to accomplish things. All of these routines work together to help me, and it's wild how off the rails things can get if I don't do any part of these routines.

School has several predictable patterns; I know which classes I will push into, and I know at what point of the day I will have time to prepare my materials for those classes, whether before or after lunch. I have a little more flexibility in when I can use the bathroom than when I was a classroom teacher since there are other adults in the room, but I still have specific times when I'll go before a class period starts.

When I get home, I'll film the day's TikTok while I'm still dressed, then I'll change and either head down to the gym or pull out my dumbells for my daily workout. If I don't work out almost as soon as I get home, there's a good chance that I'm not going to that day. Then it's a shower, dinner, and packing my breakfast and lunch for the next day (and setting the coffee for the morning - very important). Once that's done and the kitchen is clean, I'm at my desk working on my novel or some self-improvement task.

While I'm trying to get better about actually going to sleep at a decent hour, I at least try to stop my evening activities and start getting ready for bed around 10.

Even my weekends have routines, though I will occasionally break from them to spend time with my friends or for special occasions. Groceries and house cleaning, nail appointments every three weeks, laundry, and of course, a workout. If my hair isn't in a protective style, I also wash it every Saturday. Since I've gone back to meal prepping, I shifted things around to allow myself both time to do the hours of work to prep for the week and to spend time with my boyfriend.

I have a neat little pattern that makes my life manageable and succinct. But I've recently realized how it can be okay to change some parts of it and be a little more flexible.

For example, the first week back from winter break was extremely exhausting. I still wanted to work out - I've worked hard to build that habit, and it's helping me to reach some personal goals - but all that I wanted was a nap. I was worried that the nap would completely slow me down, but I found it to be the opposite. I popped up and was ready to go. Now I know that taking a nap doesn't mean that I won't work out. The rest of my routine might be pushed back and abbreviated, but things still get done.

I have a theory that many creatives have some element of neurodivergence in them - being an undiagnosed person with autism, for example. As a teacher, I'm trained to know the signs that will allow me to refer a student to a specialist for an official diagnosis to allow them the support to allow them to thrive. Therefore, my colleagues and I often discuss where our personal neurodivergence lies.

My love of routines, as well as my tendency to fixate on things (if you know of my Lord of the Rings obsession, you'll understand) make me wonder if I'm on the spectrum somewhere. I'm also very easily distracted - please don't take me to a restaurant with TVs playing if you want me to pay attention to the conversation. I also can get easily overwhelmed by too many people around me, or my environment being too loud. Which is why I rarely join my friends at bars or brunch when I know that the music will be loud and I'll have to shout to have a conversation.

When I was in college, my friends told me that they worried I'd become a homebody. Honestly, I did. I've found myself more willing to go out in the past few years than I've been for most of my adult life. I think it is partially due to a curiosity about the area I live in, as well as friends who understand that I'm not up for all activities - or even all parts of the activity. For example, I've gone to brunch with my friends and then come home instead of going to clubs or bars. My friends have never made me feel wrong about my choice, and are genuinely happy when I decide to do any activity with them.

They do know not to invite me to things on weekdays, though - some routines I refuse to break.

It helps that my boyfriend is also introverted, so we don't have to go out frequently or stay out very late. A night watching movies and playing videogames is perfect for us, which helps with my routines; I know that I don't have to plan for being out later than usual, especially with work in the morning.

All and all, routines have become part of what help me to function. I'm starting to test where there may be flexibility in them, but I know that they're not going anywhere soon.

What kind of routines do you have?