Now, Where Were We?

I met him in the 6th grade. We quickly became acquainted with one another. In the beginning, my parents were strict about how often we could see each other. No spending time with him on school nights and limited time on the weekends. As I entered high school the rules lightened up and I was able to see him every day as long as all of my homework and chores were done first.

Then came college. We went to class together, parties together, and everything in between. I’m an introvert, so it was hard for me to open up to people or feel comfortable in a room full of strangers. Having him by my side saved me from a lot of socially awkward moments.

We’ve both changed a lot over the years, but we’ve always remained close. Lately, we’ve been inseparable. Some days we sit and listen to music for hours. Sometimes he just lets me vent. I know anything I say will stay between us and he won’t judge me for it. I can’t think of one place I would go where he wouldn’t go with me. When I open my eyes in the morning, I look for him, and when I lay down at night, I need him near me.

Our closeness has caused tension in my other relationships. The last serious boyfriend I had broke it off with me because I wasn’t making our relationship a priority. My friends complain they rarely see me and even when they do, I’m always focused on him. He really has a way of making people jealous. I try to explain I’m not intentionally blocking anyone out. They just don’t understand.

My coworker Matt and I had been flirting back and forth for a few months. He officially asked me out on a date last week and I excitedly obliged. I hadn’t been out in a while, so I wanted to look my best. When the night came, I had to consult with him. Any time I needed advice or had questions, no matter how small, he always had the answer. This case was no different. He helped guide me through some beginner level makeup tutorials as I fumbled with a curling iron to style my hair. I could count on him to keep me up to date on the latest fashion trends. As we scrolled through a few celebrity social media accounts, I picked out a red jumpsuit from my closet that brought out my inner sexy.

Of course, we had to snap a few pictures of the finished look. He takes the best pictures. I never thought I was the photogenic type, but he knows how to get the lighting and angles just right.

I tried to talk him into staying home this time, but as usual he gave me a million reasons why he had to go with me. I packed up my purse and we headed out to the restaurant to meet Matt.

We met at my favorite steakhouse in the city. Matt greeted me as I walked in the restaurant and we were quickly seated at our table. We both chose to go with the chef’s special which was a grilled rib-eye, garlic mashed potatoes, and sauteed green beans, paired with a glass of Merlot. It was the perfect ambiance. Jazz music played in the background, while candle flames danced all around us. The food was amazing and so was the conversation. Everything was going great.

Suddenly, I hear a sigh of frustration. Matt looks over at me with concern in his eyes and says, “I really like you, and I’m glad we’re finally getting this chance to get to know each other better. But if I’m being honest, you’re not here with me. I know what it’s like to feel lonely even when a person is sitting right across from you. So, for the rest of the night, can we just unplug and be here with each other in this moment?”

It was like a light bulb went off inside my head as I looked down at him on the table. Without fully realizing it, I was juggling my attention between him and Matt for the past hour. If I had any real chance of saving this date and finding true connection, I knew what I needed to do. I picked him up, powered him down, buried him deep inside my purse, and slid the purse underneath us. As I straightened back up in my seat, I looked over into Matt’s eyes with an intentional gaze.

Placing both of his hands in mine, I said, “Now, where were we?”.