My new fiancé left me two days after our proposal.

Friday.

As I stared out the window at that beautiful ocean view, I couldn’t get my mind off of everything that was about to happen two days from now.

Jason was the love of my life. Everyday for the past 6 years, it has been him and I against the world. I’ve cherished every moment of everyday with this incredible man. We did everything together. He’s my best friend. I can’t imagine waking up one day away from him.

The first night we met, I remember how handsome I thought he was at first sight. Wow. He was so shy, and still is to this day. We clicked. It was almost as if God was finally bringing us into each others lives as each other’s soulmates at long last. The amount of passion we each had for each other was real, it felt right. You know that saying, “When you know, you know.”.. well, that was the moment for me. I knew. He was my perfect version of who I had always imagined my future husband to be. And here we are, 6 years later.

Last night was the best night of our lives.

I couldn’t stop staring at my engagement ring. It was beautiful. Everything I had ever hoped for and more ever since I was a little girl and dreamed about getting married someday to a handsome man. It almost seemed unreal. What did I do to deserve such a wonderful man? Everyday Jason told me how beautiful I was. How wonderful I was. How much he loved me. I was on cloud nine.

Little did I know, he was keeping a secret from me.

After our amazing proposal on the beach, we sat on blankets he had prepared for us with twinkle lights all around us. Wine and cheese waiting for us to enjoy as we watched the sunset. I love him so much. Never had I felt more in love with anyone in my lifetime, and now Jason was my fiancé .

He held my face as he kissed me, the most romantic of kisses we have ever shared with each other. I couldn’t help but melt right into him.

It was getting late. As we prepared to head back to our hotel, I noticed Jasons face. I had never seen him like this before, almost as if he was being brought to tears. At first I thought, these must be tears of joy, as I knew he was just as happy to be engaged as I was. I asked him what he was thinking about, and Jason said, ”Honey.. they’re sending me overseas.”

Sunday.

I didn’t want to let go of Jason. It was as if I couldn’t do it. I held his face as we kissed so passionately (it seemed as if it lasted forever).

We heard the horn blow, it was time.

I could not stop myself from crying. “I love you baby.” Jason said to me. We held hands as he walked away. Both of us clenching each other’s fingers until the very last second.. and then our hold was broken.

I watched him walk up the ramp. As I watched him, I noticed him reaching up to touch his eyes as he lowered his head.. he was crying. I could not hold myself back from bursting into a frantic cry. I was going to miss him so much.

I waited as long as I could on that harbor, just watching the ship sail away (I was one of the last few that stayed that long). I prayed to God to keep Jason safe while he was in Afghanistan. I prayed he would come back to me safe.

As the sun was almost set, I stared at my engagement ring, still standing on that harbor where Jason and I had parted. It glowed and sparkled so beautifully in the orange lighting of the sunset. As I looked up, the ocean water sparkled just as beautifully, nothing but a million stars in front of me. Jasons ship was just a tiny speck now that I could barely see anymore. The sunset yellow and orange. I watched until the very last second until Jasons ship had reached the horizon.

And just like that, it was gone.