You will always be my blue eyed girl.
My Blue Eyed Girl
She was my unexpected love. Who was she? How did she come to be? What did she feel when she first laid eyes on me? Until this day, I still don't know how she felt the first time she looked at me or how she came to be or who she truly was. All I know is that the first time I laid eyes on those beautiful blue eyes, those "butterfly" feelings you get in the pit of your stomach hit me like a ton of bricks. My heart raced. Breathing was heavy. My brain running wild. Every emotion was just... lost. It was all lost because of her. Those deep blue eyes made my whole world stop. Just for a brief moment, all I saw was her sitting across from and me standing, laughing like an idiot. WHO WAS SHE?
As I sat down with my friends in class, all I could think about were those blue eyes. I thought I would never get to see them again. Looking around the class, I had to distract myself and focus. Waiting and waiting until the whole class came in. Few minutes passed and who do I see, the beautiful blue eyed girl. Once more, my heart races, breathing was definitely heavy, my brain running wild and emotions was lost. This beautiful blue eyed girl was sitting across from me. Eyes met a few times and I couldn't help but smile.
Few weeks later, we talked. Exchanged a few "Hi's" and "Hello's." But this time, a full on conversation. The first sentence I blurted out to her, "Let go of my Hot Cheetos!" And she still swore I hit her with my Hot Cheetos bag across the face! A few days later, I had the courage to ask her to hang out. We went to Korean BBQ. That's when we found out we were both born on the same month, day, AND year! Crazy! Huh? I couldn't help but be flirtatious and be THAT type of girl around her. You know, the type that acts all weird and silly and touchy and laughing at every jokes type of girl. Even my cousin knew I had a crush on her. She was perfect!
Every day I got to see her, I fell more and more in love. But the most memorable moment of when I definitely knew I fell deeply and madly in love with her was the moment I had a panic AND anxiety attack during class. My friend took me out for air and told our Chef! He took me in his office and told me to sit, breathe, and relax. He even gave me a chocolate chip cookie from the baking class. (It was delicious!) My friend, then, informed my blue eyed girl of what happened and she called me right away! She ran through the whole second floor just to find me! Once she did, she dropped on her knees and started to tear up. She was very worried about me. She was as worried as if a mother saw her husband throw their child way too high up in the air. She held my hands and comforted me through the whole thing. She stayed with me until I could breathe again. She skipped the rest of class time just to make sure I was alright. She made me feel wanted and loved. Once I saw her kneeling in front of me, her eyes said it all.
Fast forward to days, weeks and months later. She was more than I expected. She was the kind of love that you knew was right, but also was wrong. We fought! We argued! We laughed! We cried! We hurt! We loved! We cared! We shared! We were the "#relationshipgoals" that our friends envied. We were the "cute couple" holding and walking down the street people would talk about. We were the "you're making us jealous" couples that everyone would say to us. But we were also toxic for each other. The arguments turned into fights. Love turned into hate. Happiness turned into sadness. And the "perfect" couple finally cracked.
A shy away from a couple years together was finally broken apart. My blue eyed girl was no longer my blue eyed girl... She was just a blue eyed girl. 'Til this day, I look back and wonder how would life have gone if I didn't meet her... if we did stay together now... or if all those obstacles never happened. What if? My blue eyed girl was now only a memory. A golden trophy in my mind. Another memory I will never get to relive again.
For one last final time, I had to say good bye to my blue eyed girl.
To my blue eyed girl, wherever you may be, forever will I love thee. For my feelings before was true. My heart will never be complete with out you. From the beginning until end. My heart will never mend. As rare as a pearl. You will always be my blue eyed girl.