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Inner Peace

by Dalila Abdelkhalek 3 years ago in dating
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A Lesson Learned the Hard Way

I was texting this guy I met on a bus from Bristol to Portsmouth. I only saw him once, for no more than three hours, but with the use of technology still had an opportunity to get to know him.

Saying that it didn’t go as either one of us had thought it would, would be a severe understatement.

We argued a lot and even though I can be very blunt, I didn’t mean anything by it. For me pointing something out to someone does not mean I'm attacking them, even though I'm underlining something I see as a negative feature. Saying I don’t like something about someone, does not mean I’m saying that don’t like them.

It quickly showed how wrong I was in assuming he would understand that.

We argued a lot and a few weeks later he blew up like a bomb that had been ticking for too long. Out of nowhere, he mentioned everything that he thought was wrong with me. He had a list of things pressing on his chest that he yelled out, but only one of them was truly interesting.

He said ‘a successful person is one who knows that they have a lot to learn,’ and I couldn’t agree more.

So instead of yelling back, commenting everything that I didn’t like about him, trying to crack his confidence and self-worth in the way he tried to do with mine, I decided to take this as an opportunity to learn.

I didn’t say anything of negative nature back. Instead of insulting him, I simply asked if there was anything else he wanted to say. He replied with another insult, and I smiled. When he asked if I wanted to add anything, I politely refused. ‘I’m not like that’ I said. And with that, I realised a lot.

The amount of peace you feel once you realise that someone’s opinion does not in any way say anything about your self-worth is amazing. Realising that even though someone chooses to be negative towards you, or feel negative about you, does not have to affect your inner peace, is amazing.

See I finally reached a state of mind in which I feel so confident in and happy about myself that no one's opinion can change that. I reached a state of mind in which I can only see or feel positive things, regardless of what someone else thinks or says.

So even though he might not agree, I'm very happy to have met him.

dating

About the author

Dalila Abdelkhalek

a 22-year-old girl, born and raised in Amsterdam, with many interests.

One of them is writing.

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