I need some space.

This isn’t an article about what to do when your partner says they need some space. In this situation, there is only one thing to be said. ‘Okay, I understand.’ You keep it cool, calm and collected. You can read all about, how you should handle it like a pro on the internet. They’ll all tell you to be understanding and take this time as an opportunity to be with yourself.

So what is this article about if it isn’t about how to handle it? This is more like what you want to say but cannot and should definitely not say to your partner.

What do you mean you need space? What the hell? What is the problem? What is it that you see as such a big deal between us, that you need space? I don’t want space. Not from you. We can talk about it and we can work through it. Please don’t do this to us. I know we had differences in the past but I’m willing to do my part and meet you halfway. What did I do wrong to push you away? Was it something I said? Please, this is breaking my heart. I love you, I love you with all my being. Please. Don’t you love me anymore? Won’t you miss me if we are apart? What about our relationship, aren’t you scared to let it go? Doesn’t it mean anything to you anymore? You told me you loved me just this morning. Was that a lie? I slept with you last night, I let you in my bed, in my body. You didn’t look like you wanted a space then? Why now? You know, you’ve made mistakes in the past but I’ve never punished you like this. I never let go of your hand, so how come you can’t do the same? I must have been a fool to not see this coming. How could I though when you have been so present and invested in me? If you go now, you’ll lose me forever. Don’t you dare leave me now only to come back in a few more days? You won't be welcomed anymore. Do you hear me? I won’t forgive you! If you leave now, we are done! Pack your shit and go, just go. I meant nothing to you. NOTHING. I knew you would leave me. You were always so distant. This is why your last relationship ended too. You are just too scared. When things get a bit serious you try to walk out the door. I can’t believe you are doing this to me. I can’t believe this is how you want to end us? I won’t forgive you. EVER. JUST GO.

I know the pain is real. You’ll go through a rollercoaster of emotions like disbelief, pain, disappointment, anger, denial. You’ll go through them all. Do the hardest though. Do the hardest and tell him that you understand and give him his space. There can only be two outcomes from this scenario. He’ll either take the time to readjust and come back as a better man for you, or he’ll leave and won’t be back again, which will be way better than being with someone who isn’t all in with you. If you tell him what goes through your head when he says he needs space, you’ll lose him and you’ll regret it for so long. So do yourself a favor, keep your mouth shut and just cry alone. It will pass before you know it.

With much love,

Miss A.