I'm Not Getting Married and No I'm Not Dying Alone

I was 15 the first time a guy mentioned marriage. No haunted trail or house could ever be as terrifying as finding out your 16-year-old boyfriend is planning to ask you to marry him in high school!

I have nothing against people getting married young. If you're happy and ready to support yourselves, go for it. For me, I never cared about marriage or even being in a relationship. I was just happy having friends and enjoying my life.

I wasn't the typical little girl who dreamt of her wedding day. I couldn't care less. I dreamed about writing a best selling novel. I imagined my life living on a beach somewhere, saving every stray cat possible, and writing songs people would sing for generations to come.

A floofy white dress, big cake that's probably dried out from being made days ago, and a giant party with two different families trying to get along just sounded like a horror movie come to life.

Luckily, I grew up in a generation that's becoming more okay with not getting married. My family still thinks it's strange. My married friends have moved on, not liking that I don't have a partner to double date with them. To be honest, I'm probably more mature than any of them, but hey, if they don't like me because I'm not married, their loss.

I found myself in a long term relationship and actually thought marriage might be on the table. It was years before I realized the truth. For a while, I felt like everyone might be right. If I didn't fall in love and get married, I was doomed to die alone.

Then, I got a grip on reality and realized nothing had changed. Whether I was with someone or not, I was still me. As long as I had myself, I'd never be alone.

The relationship eventually ended after about a decade. He had this nasty habit of blaming everything he did wrong on me and expecting me to fix it. I wanted a partner, not a spoiled brat who couldn't take responsibility when he screwed up.

I'm not one of those women who think all men (or whatever you're into) are bad. I'm honestly just not interested in the fairy tale romance, getting married, or sharing my bed. Seriously, I like my space and don't need someone trying to steal my side of the bed.

Like I said, I'm not alone in this. Women have felt this way for generations. But, many were forced to marry just to meet societal norms. Today, the norms can screw themselves. Frankly, I think it's become far more common to not get married for a variety of reasons, such as:

1. Women don't need someone to support them financially. We're perfectly capable of working and taking care of ourselves. Now, more than ever, women can do most any job they want.
2. Dating has become a joke. It's too much about hookups than it is really getting to know someone. Plus, there's only so many crappy relationships you can handle in one lifetime.
3. It's okay to be a single mother. Women who wanted a child years ago had to get married to become a mother or be shunned by everyone. Now, it's fine to co-parent with a friend or just go to a sperm bank.
4. Sadly, women are expected to be the perfect housewife and go to work and be a mother. That's on top of taking care of their partner too. If the partner isn't chipping in, what are you really gaining in a marriage? Of course, I always love seeing relationships where chores and parenting are equal.
5. Compromising sucks. Yes, this sounds selfish, but if you've ever been in a relationship where compromise meant always being the one to give up what you enjoy, you'll fully understand this one. Besides, if I can be perfectly happy without always compromising for someone else, why not?
6. We like having our own space. Marriage or even just moving in together means suddenly having someone else around all the time. The idea of dating, but having your own separate places sounds heavenly. You get a relationship, but still get to come home to peace quiet later.

I'm not saying I won't ever date again, but I can guarantee I'll never get married. Never wanted to and can't find a single benefit. And for all the naysayers of all ages, no I'm not dying sad and alone.

I have myself, I have friends, and of course, I'll always continue to save every stray cat I find. They're far less bitchy and annoying than any husband.