I Love You

You meet a person, you date, you make things official and bam, one of you pops the three glorious words: 'I. LOVE. YOU'

DAYUM!

Now there are various reactions that people have to those words being said to them. In my situation, my partner said it to me on text. I said something cute and he replied with I love you.

When I got that reply, I was like wow. I definitely felt overwhelmed, confused, and unsure. This was the first time someone I was dating said those words to me. I was also a bit cheesed he said it over text messaging but I have learnt not to take it to heart. I am romantic so I am a sucker for the cliche stuff.

I didn't reply to him after I got that message. It was late at night and I was seeing him the next day. Like bruh, you could have waited till you saw me. He got me in a mess that night. I could not sleep properly, I kept thinking and thinking about what he said. "He loves me?" is that really genuine or he felt the need to reply to what I said with that.

But then again, what do I know about real love? I know nothing. I am in my early twenties and do I understand what real love is. Am I really in love? Took me a few days to reply him. I knew this person was special. Even when he pisses me off and he talks to me, I become calm. If he takes like 9 hours to reply, I get cheesed but I am a patient person so I don't spam him with 10 more messages. So when he does reply, I feel relieved and also calm but low-key annoyed he took that long.

I looked in him in the face and said "I love you too"

He smiled and replied with "I love you more"

I am like more? That even took me more off guard. I am not used to someone professing their love that openly to me especially someone I was romantically involved with. In fact, it is the first time a partner had told me they loved me.

So you could imagine my doubt like really? How do you love me more? Like I could not comprehend it. I had my doubts for a few days. At times now I still do. My expectations for what people do when in love or act in the beginning stage is different from the actual reality I am facing.

What really is love?

To me, my idea of love is

Making that person a priority.

Making time for them.

Doing the little small things

Making them feel like they are the most important thing in the world without them asking.

Love is not giving the person doubts of your feelings for them. Love is about the actions. Although words do carry meaning but actions carry the bigger meaning. Quite frankly, the actions are the real deal.

I don't know how people express their love. I don't know how other people understand or interpret it. There is no 'one' certain interpretation to what LOVE is. How does it feel when you see your partner? How does it feel when you tell them you love them? How does it feel when you hear them say it? I make the effort to show my partner I care and love him. He goes I don't need to do all of that to show my love for him but would I listen?

No I won't. That is way of expressing my love for someone. I devote myself to this person that they have the power to crush me both emotionally, and physically. The funny thing is that even though I have been hurt a couple of times, I haven't let myself think that all potentials are like my previous partners. Yes, I am still skeptical of the things my partner does or say but I am really trying my best to truly trust him without having a hint of doubt. I have had a partner lie to me. Ever since then, subconsciously, it has really affected me with a new interest.

For all you readers out there, if you are in love, in the process, have loved, or looking to fall in love one day, LOVE is a beautiful thing that should make you feel on top of the word not the other way around.