How To Tell If a Girl Is Really Into You, or Just Being Nice

Avoid the stress of mixed signals and understand the hints girls give off to tell if she is really into you, or just being nice.

How To Tell If a Girl Is Really Into You, or Just Being Nice
Photo by Refinery29

"Oh, sorry hun, I don't like you like that! I just was being friendly."

Hearing these two sentences hurts, and believe it or not, it's something that almost every guy has heard at least once. The truth is that girls can be pretty cryptic when it comes to showing interest, and it's really easy to get the mixed signals.

As hard as it may be to do, you do have to keep an eye out to see if women are interested in you. Otherwise, you may end up in a very awkward situation. Though most of these tips aren't surefire signs of interest, they are strong indicators that a girl may have the hots for you.

The Universal Flirting Look

Though not all women do this look, this is one of the few body language moves that has remained consistent across all cultures. This Universal Flirting Look, or as we'll call it, the UFL, has a woman lowering her chin, looking up at you, and giving a coy smile.

In some cases, the UFL may also be accompanied by lip licking, lip biting, or pursing one's lips suggestively. They may also twirl their hair more or smile around you more.

Body Language Mirroring

Mirroring is a subtle, subconscious thing that people do when they're feeling very "in sync" with a person. When girls flirt, they often will start to pick up your mannerisms and gestures.

Girls who are just being nice or friendly might also imitate your gestures if they want to be your friend, or if they're agreeing with your viewpoint. However, if you notice this sign with others on this list, you may have some serious flirtation going on.

A girl who's just being nice and is hoping you'll go away, on the other hand, won't imitate your gestures at all. It's a very subtle way of saying, "We're not connecting."

Lots Of Smiling And Laughter

Obviously, seeing a girl who's smiling at you or laughing at your jokes is a good sign. This means that, at the very least, they are somewhat comfortable in your presence and you're probably not creeping them out. At the very least, you've got a female friend talking to you.

There's a decent chance she may be flirting with you, too, especially if she touches you, snuggles up to you, or holds eye contact for a slightly long time after she lets out a giggle.

The only time this isn't true is when you notice that it's a nervous laugh, and that they're regularly looking away from you or stepping away from you. That means you've probably weirded them out, and you may want to just excuse yourself.


Most of the time, girls won't touch guys unless they're flirting.

Obviously, there are ladies out there who are touchy-feely with everyone, but they tend to hug, touch, and grab hands of everyone around them. Even among touchy girls, there are certain places where they don't touch unless they're interested in you.

If you notice that she's touching your upper arms or your legs, she's interested. If she grabs your crotch, she might be too interested. Oh well, right?

Bringing Up Sex Frequently

Artwork by Anna Sudit

Though this could just be because she has a raunchy sense of humor, you should definitely raise an eyebrow when you hear a girl regularly reference sex around you. More liberated girls may even get straight to the point and ask what you enjoy in bed.

Most of the time, when girls talk about what they enjoy during sex, it's because they want to have sex with you.


Photo by Clem Onojeghuo

Strutting is something that could be a coincidence, or it could be a sign that she's legitimately into you. When a girl makes a point of walking around you, swaying her hips, and seemingly trying to get your attention, she may be strutting her stuff to see if you'll talk to her.

Of course, there are women who just have a natural way of walking that seems like strutting. So, this may just be her walking. Check for other signs of flirting just in case - and proceed with caution.

Prolonged Eye Contact/Staring

Artwork by Anna Sudit

You know how you can't help but gawk when you see a woman who's stunningly beautiful walk past you? Women do the same thing when they see a guy who they're really into.

Prolonged eye contact is also a good sign that she may be into you on a more-than-friendly level. Scientists have also noticed that a person's pupils tend to dilate when they are looking at someone that they want to sleep with.

So, if you notice her pupils growing large around you, it could be that she's a bit smitten.

Initiating A Lot Of Contact

Photo by Refinery29

Unless the girl in question is very extroverted, friendly, and gregarious, a very high level of initiating contact is often a sign that she's interested in being more than friends. If she's asking for your number, regularly hitting you up, and making a point of showing how much you two have in common, there's a relatively decent chance that she's interested.

A big sign that she really wants you is if she regularly "corners" you by showing up in places that she knows you'll be with the sole purpose of chatting you up. Should this happen, you may need to take a hint and ask for her number.

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Ossiana Tepfenhart
Ossiana Tepfenhart
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Ossiana Tepfenhart

Ossiana Tepfenhart is a writer based out of New Jersey. This is her work account. She loves gifts and tips, so if you like something, tip her!

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