How to Identify Hyper-Responsibility (And How to Get Rid of It)

Do you often feel like you've ruined someone's life? Or, on the contrary, are you sure you can make someone happy? You think you have to work at home, or at work time is catastrophically insufficient (who else but you?). Do you have remorse when you leave the child in the care of the grandmother/nanny and leave for the whole evening?

Most likely you have a problem - you try to take on a burden that is beyond your control and you try to keep everything under control.

Hyper-responsibility test

If you suspect that you are suffering from hyper-responsibility, answer the questions below:

• Are you often overloaded?

• Do you have time for yourself?

• Are you willing to take on new tasks?

• Do you know the feeling that you are permanently indebted to someone?

• Are the problems and feelings of those close to you important to you?

• Are you inclined to control the actions of others, believing that without them they will not be able to cope?

• Are you irritated by people who do not control the situation and consider you irresponsible?

• Can't you say "no" to your relatives, loved ones, bosses, as if this were forbidden or if nothing good will happen if you don't get involved?

If you answered yes to at least four questions, then hyper-responsibility characterizes you.

How to reduce the symptoms of hyper-responsibility:

• Just declare yourself the center of YOUR life

• Don't help people make important decisions. You don't have to suggest to children which profession will help them make more money. Don't offer help to anyone you meet along the way.

• The belief that you know everything better than others is an illusion. Others have their strengths, give them a chance to show them. Moreover, they have to make their own mistakes, which are no less valuable than achievements.

Be aware of where you start and where your limits end

Write down your responsibilities and defend your boundaries. Your task is to clearly understand what is up to you and what is up to others.

Is it your responsibility to complete the project on time? But to make a presentation for a client? Is it up to you whether your project will be accepted even if it is ideal?

By the way, this is true not only in the professional sphere.

Recognizes other people's personalities

Recognize that other people have the right to choose, the right to live as they see fit. They may not do what you think is right. It is especially important to understand this about children and elderly parents.

But if you do not delegate responsibility in time, then hyper-responsibility could later lead to war. But there is little to delegate responsibility. Make sure you allow other people to feel their share of responsibility.

It is very important to be satisfied with yourself and your life for people of all ages - both at the age of 2 and at 92. For example, a child must have household responsibilities, which he must fulfill without remembering. It is much worse to overprotect the older generation.

When you relieve your parents of all responsibilities (of course, with the best of intentions), they begin to feel useless, superfluous. It's a terrible feeling, so let the grandmothers knit socks and the grandma digs the garden.

They need these occupations to live. You can buy your mother all the socks in the world, and bring her father potatoes for 10 years before. But don't do that.

Spare yourself and you will find out how much emotional power you have if you do not make an effort where it is not appropriate. Allow people to carry their burden - this is the meaning of life.

The world will not be lost without your support. Stop being an omnipotent being and you will see how wonderful it is to be simply mortal and to carry a burden on your shoulders.