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Foreign Women Dating: Is It Better to Be Similar to Your Partner?

You’re a team when you’re a couple.

By Vera TischenkoPublished 3 months ago 5 min read
by Tima Miroshnichenko on Pexels

Do opposites really attract?

It’s a conventional belief that being with someone different from you makes your relationship more likely to last.

No matter who you’re with, or even if you’re dating foreign women, it’s often seen as agreeable when you’re in this kind of a relationship.

What many of you might not know, however, is that researchers have found that your level of similarity to your partner tends to affect your happiness. It may sound complicated, but it’s true.

Now, is it necessary, or in this case, is it better to be similar to your partner?

To answer this million-dollar question, here are a few things you should consider and learn more about.

The Charm of Opposites

It’s fascinating to have the opportunity to grow as a better person when you’re with someone who has different traits and values from yours. It allows you to learn and accept the things you don’t normally believe in and makes you realize what you lack at some point.

You’re a team when you’re a couple. You complete and complement each other and are always there for one another. Similarly, your varied strengths and weaknesses integrate your relationship as a whole, making you function productively while being together.

Remarkably, this explains why some look for a person that is exactly their opposite.

The Influence of Similarities

Research suggests that you and your partner’s similarities help your relationship more than your complementary traits and values.

A study by the University of Kansas that included 1,532 couples found that 86% of them were similar to each other in nature and lasted longer than those who weren't.

However, it’s important to take note that being similar to each other doesn’t necessarily mean you’re identical. It remains a fact that we are all different and unique individuals no matter what.

Having the Same Level of Extraversion

As it turns out, having the same level of extraversion as that of your partner isn’t ideal for your overall well-being. It’s not always that our imperfections complement that of others’.

For instance, someone with a relatively low level of conscientiousness has to be with someone who has a far higher level of it because the similarity, in this case, isn’t optimal.

by Tima Miroshnichenko on Pexels

The Possibility of Being Similar

Unfortunately, being similar to each other can be a factor that makes your relationship stale. Because you’re too alike and you share almost all the same traits and values, you’ll likely end up being predictable.

It makes you too comfortable in your relationship that might eventually make you give less effort, believing that it’s less likely for you to break up.

At the same time, relationships are more sustainable with someone similar to you, and all it needs is hard work, just as all relationships do.

Choosing a Compatible Partner

Finding your match is no easy journey. Some get lucky, and some have it tough.

There are a lot of ways for you to approach foreign women when you’re in the dating scene. Whether you look for someone similar or totally opposite from you depends on how you think you can handle a relationship.

Here are some helpful tips you can apply:

  1. Look for someone you can be yourself with.
  2. It’s not necessary to look for the same qualities in a partner.
  3. Get to know more potential partners by stepping out of your comfort zone.
  4. Try to at least be with someone with whom you share the same values in life.
  5. Take your time. You shouldn't rush into relationships.
  6. Be with someone because you have feelings for them and not because you need them.
  7. Don’t try and expect your partner to change just to satisfy your standards. You’re there to love the person, no matter how different you are from each other.

Zones of Compatibility

The differences between you and your partner, including the zones of compatibility, influence the sustainability of your relationship.

1. Views and Perceptions of Life

Sharing opposite views on life with your partner makes it more challenging to achieve an amicable relationship. You’re most likely to argue, especially when going through tough times together.

However, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you ought to think differently about life all the time because learning from each other won’t be possible if you have the same way of thinking.

by Tima Miroshnichenko on Pexels

On another note, your varying views on finances, budgeting, politics, religious beliefs, and raising children are some of the common grounds that lead to strong arguments which will likely cause your relationship to end.

2. Hobbies, Interests, and Activities

Choosing a partner who is interested in almost all the things you do is one of the pillars of a strong relationship. Even while in the early stages, it's easy to be with each other because you don’t have a hard time thinking of something you both enjoy.

Again, you don’t exactly have to be the same. For some, it’s an adventure to try new things, especially ones that their partner enjoys, as a way to strengthen their relationship.

So don’t put pressure on yourself or on your partner to like the same things. After all, you can still make it work even by having to retain what you’re both interested in.

3. Sexual Drive and Intimacy

Varying sexual drives is one of the top causes of problems in relationships.

You’re likely to argue and fight when one of you wants to be more active while the other is readily fulfilled.

Regardless of who has a higher or lower sexual drive, it’s important to learn to compromise. Meet each other’s needs and respect each other’s capacities by finding common ground and balancing your activity frequency in the bedroom.

4. Basic Attitude

It’s helpful to have a similar attitude if you want your relationship to last.

True enough, meager differences make your partnership more engaging, but bigger ones won’t. In fact, it can even cause rifts between the two of you.

Handling Your Relationship Your Way

The answer is, it all depends on you.

As long as you know how to handle your relationship in your own way, your similarities and differences will matter less.

What applies to some doesn’t naturally apply to you, and what works for you isn’t always the same for others.

Love is way too complicated to follow one single rule, so don’t waste your time trying to choose between being with someone identical or opposite from you.

Vera Tischenko, Dating Coach and Professional Matchmaker for Kiev Women


About the Creator

Vera Tischenko

Dating Coach and Professional Matchmaker for Kiev Women

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