Dating: Do's & Don'ts
Dating: Do's & Don'ts

Effective Dating Tips & Advice for Men

by Rose Sours 9 months ago in advice

Sometimes a man just needs a little 'pick me up' to get him started. This lens introduces a guy to some basic dating tips, different dating perspectives and techniques, and some comedy videos to let go of a serious attitude. Humor with relaxed confidence is the best attitude to have when approaching or dating women.

Effective Dating Tips & Advice for Men

Be the guy she lusts over.

Women lust after guys for many different reasons, and there's no way that any guy can make every woman lust after him. However, there are some things that you can do in order to make yourself attractive to as many women as possible. Many of these suggestions are simple to implement and yet once you perfect them, you'll have many women lusting over you!

The first selection of suggestions is with regard to your appearance. Although most physical attributes are subjective, and different body shapes appeal to different women, there are some things that are universal. For example, women like their men to look clean and fresh. Turn up on a date with a five o'clock shadow, covered in ink, and wearing a crumpled shirt and jeans, and you're not likely to get a good response from your date. Turn up recently shaved, with the same clothes, but with them freshly laundered and your date is going to have a better first impression of you. Other physical things are a white dazzling smile and a decent haircut (although hair length and style again is a subjective area!). If you can get your eyes to twinkle—or even get that George Clooney eye-crinkle thing going on, you're off to a great start!

Next comes the personality traits that most women love (or hate). A sense of humor is often at the top, or near the top of a list of "must have" attributes that women look for in a guy. This isn't necessarily a Simpsons or South Park sense of humor, but rather showing yourself to be a person that can laugh and who doesn't take himself or life too seriously. Although she probably won't appreciate you making a public spectacle of yourself (and her!) with outrageous behavior, if you can make a woman laugh, you hold her in the palm of your hand. Other personality traits are listening to what she has to say, not monopolizing the conversation, not being too macho in your approach to who picks up the check, not appearing to be needy or high maintenance, and having an air of self-confidence that doesn't border on arrogance. If you can manage to hold a conversation that doesn't revolve around sports, then you're going to score even higher on her lust scale!

Although the stereotypical woman lusts after a six-pack abdomen, and shoulders the size of Texas, this isn't what the average woman is looking for. Although women do go for this kind of thing in certain situations, as with guys, this is usually a social thing rather than a personal choice in a partner. To be a guy that women lust over, you don't necessarily have to attend charm school or be their dissertation editor and spend three hours in the gym everyday—just be attentive, quietly confident, relaxed, and sincere, but above all, be yourself. Nothing is more attractive than a man who is comfortable in his own skin!

Can you trust a beautiful woman?

Women are women are women! Beautiful or not, they are all individual, unpredictable and have their own ideas about what's right and wrong.

They often don't pay attention to logic, and have a tendency to change their mind without any warning. How physically attractive they are is no indicator as to whether or not you can trust them.

What you need to be concerned about is how she acts. Does she act in a flirty manner with other men for example? Does she use her looks to get what she wants? Does she flirt with your friends? How she behaves is far more of a "tell" than her beauty. Beauty is just packaging, it's not an indication of the person inside.

Girls who aren't so beautiful are no more and no less likely to be trustworthy. Their values are not necessarily linked to their looks. The difference between them is that the beauty has more opportunities to cheat offered to her, but it doesn't mean that she will take them. Nor does it mean that the less beautiful girl would stay with you should another guy try to tempt her away.

Trust is one of the foundation stones of any relationship. You have to trust your partner; otherwise you need to let them go. If you have a relationship with a beautiful woman and you suspect she's going to have an affair with every guy that makes a pass at her, then your insecurity of what she "could" do is going to do more damage to the relationship than her beauty will! It will also drive her away because her reassurances that she's not interested in the other guys won't ever be enough for you to trust her.

Envy is another thing you need to watch out for if you're dating a beautiful woman. Even amongst your closest friends there will be those who will look for an opportunity to see if he can take her from you. Yes, this could also happen with a woman who isn't so pretty, but it's far less likely to be an issue—and this is where physical attractiveness comes into play. Depending on how your friends are, they could feed your insecurities by telling you that she does respond to their flirting, or they've seen her talking with other guys, just to see your reaction. You have to learn to trust your instincts. If she says she's not cheating, she spends most of her free-time with you and is usually where she says she's going to be, then what opportunity does she have? If you have reason to doubt her, then check out her story quietly—just make sure she doesn't find out, otherwise she'll walk out of the relationship not because she wants to be with someone else, but simply because she doesn't want to be with someone who doubts her word.

How much does one date matter?

The answer to this question very much depends on two things, whether or not this is a first date, and how much you like this girl.

If this is a first date then one date matters immensely, especially if you hope to see her again. In this situation, the old cliché of first impressions being important couldn't be more accurate. During this one date you are being "interviewed" to see whether or not she likes you enough to have a second date. Now if you don't care very much either way, then it doesn't matter so much. If, however, you really like her and want to get to know her better, then consider that this one date is a trial to let her see how you work out!

For a first date, you need to prepare in advance of meeting up with her. You need to think about the kind of girl you're meeting. Is she well educated and have a good job? Or is she a student? This kind of information will give you clues about where you're going to take her, what to wear to fit in with the other people who will be there, you need to know what kind of topics you should be talking about to appear interesting—but not weird—and informed without being geeky!

You should arrange a date that's within both your comfort zone and hers. To place either at a disadvantage is not going to get the date off to a good start. If you're both feeling relaxed, then your true nature will show and if she likes it, you'll get that second date! If one of you is feeling ill at ease, then the conversation won't flow and one date will be all you'll get (or maybe want!) with this girl.

Another thing to think about on this issue is what are you looking for? Are you looking for a serious relationship with someone special? If so, then the first date scenario is really important. If, however, you're only looking for a companion, someone to spend a few hours with, nothing heavy, nothing serious, no commitment, then one date might be all you'll have with them. In this scenario, the date probably doesn't matter so much as how much fun you can have with the person you're sharing the date with. Chances are you're both just looking for the same thing—a good time that doesn't really matter if it is repeated.

Whether or not one date matters is directly connected to the kind of relationship you want with the girl you're meeting. If you hope it's serious, it matters a lot—if you're looking for a one-night stand, then it doesn't matter at all!

Rose Sours
Rose Sours
Read next: 'Chocolate Kisses'
Rose Sours

I am an experienced copy editor, proofreader from PapersEditing. I have more than 20 years of experience and can help your writing be clear, concise, and error-free.

See all posts by Rose Sours