Can you still believe in love after two failed relationships? Can love really be cultivated?

The first first love was when I was in college. At that time, the love was very sweet, carefree, and pure. I only saw each other in my eyes, and I loved each other deeply. At that time, I had no money but I was very happy. After talking for two years, the other party was younger than me, and the family conditions were slightly better than mine. His parents did not agree. At that time, I was 23 years old. When we were together, he was young at that time. First, he didn’t graduate and didn’t have a job. Second, it was a hard injury at age. , I was so firm, but he swayed and gave up. After a year of entanglement, he finally failed to reach the end. It took two years to come out.

Later, I went to work and met a boy who was three years older than me. This boy was very handsome. He was 183 and had two houses in a first-tier city. But God was very tricky. We got along for half a year. At that time, I was deeply In love with him, he confessed to me that he was divorced and had an eight-year-old son. At that time, I knew that the sky was about to fall. I never thought of looking for a divorced man with children. Convince myself to accept it slowly, because I love him, I just learned the fact that he is divorced and has children. In order to keep me and stabilize my heart, he used the strategy of slowing down and said that we would get married and give me a house, which made me feel a little more secure. But in fact, I never took the initiative to mention it for the next six months. Every time I talk about the issue of the transfer of the house, it is delayed again and again.

Until recently, because of Valentine's Day, he didn't say that the two of us were unhappy about this incident. This incident was the fuse, and he ignored me directly and violently. Our relationship ended here. On the first day of violence, I took the initiative to break up with him, but he didn't respond. Later, I also reflected on myself, did I sometimes get angry with him indiscriminately and made him unbearable? It was about 15 days of cold violence, and I took the initiative to message him and contact him. He apologized and said that he would change it in the future. After 20 days of practice, I asked him to explain why he was so cruel and cruel to me. He said that his family could not meet my requirements for marriage. The savings are only 100,000, there is no betrothal money, and there is no money for the wedding. As for the issue of the house, he doesn't talk about it. Now that I think about it, this is just what he said. , He thought that in the next few months we had no money to fall in love, and we didn't even have money to eat. I would feel aggrieved if I was unhappy and made a face, and I was also aggrieved because he lost 50,000 by giving his credit card to a friend to open a store. He repays 2,000 a month, and I was so stupid that I would pay him a salary to help him pay it back and face it together. As long as two people love each other, I am willing to accompany him to endure hardships. He said that he will wait until the epidemic is over. Now think about what you have. How stupid, maybe it's just an excuse for him to be tired and don't want to take responsibility, I still believe it

In the past month, I have suddenly collapsed countless times, and my spirit has been tortured. To be honest, I still miss him, but I hate him in my heart. My reason tells me that he is not worthy of my love, let alone my love. I should put it down and start again. Life, no matter how sad it is, I will only hide in the bed and shed tears in the middle of the night, not letting my family know, I suffer in silence, and I don’t want them to worry about me. Looking back on the little things I have gotten along with, maybe my brain is flooded. , I trusted him too much, so I was deceived by him. Seeing his parents was delayed again and again. We didn't see his parents until we had been together for ten months. He was late when he met my parents. His parents helped him to smooth things out. He said that it was because he had no confidence and dared not face my parents. I said that I had done ideological work with my parents, and they had accepted this matter, but in fact, there were only I know how difficult it was for me to persuade my parents, how many times I felt uncomfortable about this matter, how many times I was wronged, and how many times I let my parents worry and feel sad, because my parents were very extreme and firm at the beginning, saying If I look for him, I will cut off the relationship with me, but the final result is still not good.

(ps: In fact, I talked to his ex-wife about the reason for the ex-wife’s divorce. The ex-wife was beautiful and felt more reasonable in chatting. The ex-wife said that the main reason was that he cheated. He has been with him for a year, and the last year was almost violent, so he decided to divorce, but from his words, he passed all the responsibilities to his ex-wife, saying that his ex-wife had an affair, and his ex-wife said that he had also talked before talking to me. Several of them called him a liar. They couldn't accept that he had children. In the end, he broke up coldly and violently. It should be a common trick. In short, I also saw some problems clearly. The appearance of a man is really not the most important thing, but the inner quality and responsibility It is very important to be responsible!, now that I think about how I was really carried away by love at that time, I can forgive him for all the things that ordinary people see unacceptable)

Right now, I am actually very confused. Seeing that I am almost 28 years old, I am still a little anxious. After all, I have also entered the team of older leftover women. In fact, I am afraid that I will not be able to marry. No, there are still many boys chasing me, but I don’t feel the ones who like me. Sometimes I feel like I’m very jian. In my mother’s words, I don’t love those who should love me, and I prefer to love those who shouldn’t love me. I look pretty, She is sweet and has a good temperament. She has taught dance outside before. She is 163 51kg and can dress up. She has a good job and is very stable. It is also relatively popular, and the family background is OK. I have a suite in a first-tier city. Although my parents are very disappointed with me, because they introduced me to many blind dates with good conditions, but they were all rejected by me. I am a stubborn person. If you love someone, you will give up and don’t leave a way for yourself. Although my parents say they don’t care about me anymore, but, my own daughter, it’s impossible to just ignore it. She is still worried about my relationship issues, and she is also active. I was looking for someone, and my family introduced a local boy. He was a month younger than me. He was very ordinary, but I just didn’t like it. I don’t know what to do now. , I feel sorry and uncomfortable. I am actually a very filial girl. When my mother is uncomfortable and needs something, I will be very considerate and buy some practical things for her inadvertently. It can be said that my parents are caring My little padded jacket, I am more careful. Sometimes my parents can’t handle things, I will help them easily. I am also diligent at home. I do not rely on my mother to wash my clothes. I occasionally cook and mop the floor. In this case, I have disappointed and worried my parents

I often wonder, is this my life, should I accept it? Give up love and find someone my parents like that I don't feel good about. But I can't pass this test in my heart. I'm afraid that I will regret my choice, and I'm afraid that my marriage life will be unhappy in the future. My mother often says that love It can be cultivated slowly, as long as the man is good to you and has a conscience, the quality of a man is the most important, I also want to listen to my mother's words, I also want to be a good girl, but it is very difficult

I hope that someone who has come over can give me some advice and experience to share, so that I can slowly convince myself and get out of the shadows