9 Principles for Anyone Who Wants to Succeed in Love and Life!

Discover the 9 secrets of Success in Love and Life in the vision of the expert Henry Cloud!

Professor Dr. Henry Cloud is a specialist in clinical psychology and a leadership consultant, but also the author of over 20 books. As a businessman and as a psychologist, Cloud gained extensive experience that allowed him to connect with people who were successful, professionally or personally. In order to identify the components of success, Cloud studied their lives.

Success is for those who strive to achieve it, is the conclusion reached by Cloud…

Success is the pursuit of things and actions that you consciously do, and not a matter of karma or luck. In the book "9 Things You Simply MUST DO to Succeed in Love and Life", Henry Cloud introduces the 9 characteristics of successful people.

Here are the 9 steps (principles) in Henry Cloud's conception that can bring anyone close to fulfillment and success in love, but also in career and life.

9 things to do to succeed in love and in life

1. Unearth

The first principle that Henry Cloud mentions is one that invites self-discovery. Let's appeal to what is inside us, the specialist advises us…

Successful people know their dreams and want to follow them. This is where the real-life is. Inside each of us are sheltered piles of dreams, desires, passion. 

Discover them, take them out of anonymity, let them come to the surface, find them a crack through which they can free themselves. Once you have discovered your dreams and desires and realized them, act in a concrete way to achieve them.

2. Remove the masseuse

Professor Cloud uses a metaphor to explain this principle, while also appealing to its own meaning. There are many people who refuse to face their fears. A sick mass can be a source of infection.

Over time, if left untreated, it can affect the health of your entire body. But there are many who dismiss the thought of going to the dentist to extract a mass that has been causing them pain for a long time.

On the other hand, there are many who overcome their irrational fear of the dentist and face the pain of removing the mass so that later they can get rid of the pain once and for all.

These people are people who know what success means, Cloud explains. It is not at all pleasant for anyone to face their pain. But successful people do it, knowing that only by facing their pain can they get rid of it permanently.

Henry Cloud advises us to remove from our lives the things, the memories, the past, the feelings that hurt us. It is vital that we get rid of bad and negative things so that we do not have time to take up space in our lives and hurt ourselves even more.

3. Play the movie

In the book "Things You Simply Must Do to Succeed in Love and Life", Henry Cloud offers us an excellent exercise, that of playing a movie of your own life, a movie in which you are the main hero. The purpose of this exercise is to see your life as it is.

Why? To be able to live it as it deserves. At the same time, successful people, says the specialist, do not act without considering the future consequences of actions.

Successful people look to the future not only when they make big decisions, but also when they make secondary decisions. Successful people ACT to be able to control the things in the future that can be controlled, but also to direct their future in the direction they want to go.

4. Do something

Successful people are lively, proactive, involved. Initiates create, establish, does something that did not exist before, determine something, etc. 

Successful people take action to make things happen. "Successful people do not see themselves as victims of circumstances." Successful people want to correct difficult situations and take steps to do so. And wanting to solve a problem, whether it was caused by you or someone else, is a necessary step in fixing it.

5. Behave like an ant

People have something to learn from ants, according to Henry Cloud. Slowly, slowly, with steps forward, the ants get where they want, to the crumbs they were looking for.

Ants know what work and effort are all about while accepting the moral standards of hard work. Ants are persevering and do not give up. And I know how to gather and build.

6. Smell good

As human beings, it defines what we love and what we hate. What we love says a lot about who we are. But what we hate can say just as much about who we are and can help us understand who we are.

When we hate something, we aim to be different, different from what we hate. It is important that when we hate something we do it objectively.

If we hate hypocrisy, abuse, deception, we will try to be on the opposite side. If we hate subjectively instead, then hatred can become toxic and poisonous to the person who hosts such feelings. Successful people stay away from what they hate objectively, trying to be the reverse of what they hate.

7. Don't always play right

Playing right means taking into account the "eye for eye and tooth for tooth" principle. Correctness means responding positively to good action and responding negatively to a bad action.

This fairness, according to Cloud, can ruin any relationship in your life. This kind of fairness can be disastrous if you want to build a healthy and happy relationship that will last. The secret of successful people is not to treat others the way they are treated, but even better.

8. Be humble

Humility is constructive when it is healthy, Cloud tells us in his book. The humble attitude is what allows you to be who you are, removing the need to be more than that.

The humble attitude allows you to accept your mistakes and failures, to be able to correct them, and to learn from them. Humility also allows you to forgive the mistakes of others and rejoice when they are successful. Indeed, "pride is concerned with those who are right, and humility is concerned with what is right." (Ezra Taft Benson)

9. Upset the right people

Successful people care about others. They avoid hurting them or making them suffer. But when it comes to making decisions, successful people don't make them based on fear of how others might react to their decisions. Nobody says not to be a nice and kind person to those around you … It would be wonderful to do that.

But you should not give up your identity, your principles, and your values ​​just to make sure that you do not cause dissatisfaction among others and that you do not upset anyone.

You can't live your life to its true value if you are one step ahead of it, caring about the attitudes of others. You need to know that successful people do not try to avoid upsetting someone. But if it upsets someone, make sure they are the right person. And most certainly, they have good reasons.