4 Telling Signs You're Invisible To Your Partner

Relationships are hard work. And nobody should tell you otherwise.

Successful relationships are built from sweat and blood. There are moments you compromise on personal preferences. Some days, one partner muzzles up and plays along, acting the fool. Together, couples relish uplifting moments and endure the downcast moments.

A long-lasting relationship hinges on a mindset of service and sacrifice. Each partner serves the other instead of expecting to be served. Relationships only blossom when partners truly see and acknowledge each other.

Tradeoffs are necessary to sustain and grow relationships. Humans are fallible. Occasionally, partners will ruffle each other's feathers. Relationship requires commitment. It's all hands on deck activity. Both parties must be present and involved.

Commitment and equal investments from both partners bring good odds to a relationship.

A relationship is a team sport. And as obvious as this is, people enter and turn it into an individual sport.

One partner becomes the performer and the other the spectator. An unconventional dynamic. But this unconventional dynamic could work if the spectator is at least supportive. Supporting, cheering on, and acknowledging the performing partner. But usually, this isn't the case. The spectator partner in the relationship is distant, aloof, and uninterested.

Many relationships have the dynamics of an individual sport. One partner is selfish and self-centred. The performer in the relationship takes on the full brunt of the relationship. They shoulder all the work necessary to sustain the relationship.

Such relationships break my rule for building healthy and long-lasting relationships.

You must see them, and they must see you in order to build a successful relationship.

A relationship is bound to careen to a grisly crash if couples fail this rule.

Failing this rule creates an imbalance in the relationship. One partner sees their partner and satisfies their needs. The other doesn't see their partner and their needs.

Such a relationship dynamic is unbalanced.

Navigating such an imbalance relationship like this is both frustrating and enervating. Such relationships will reel to an ultimate separation.

Here are five telling signs you are in a lopsided relationship.

1. You constantly feel overwhelmed

When a relationship weighs heavily on one-sided, the entire brunt of the relationship falls squarely on one partner. Eventually, that partner caves in. They become overwhelmed - physically and mentally.

At the beginning of a relationship, partners are excited and feel privileged to serve the other partner. There is fulfilment and satisfaction. They understand their presence and actions bring excitement to their partner. However, that changes down the line in the relationship. Because the constant dependency of one partner on the other starts to have its toll. One partner singular becomes responsible for keeping the wheels of the relationship turning.

Are you complaining quietly or openly about your obligations and responsibilities in your relationship? Well, you're possibly in a lopsided relationship. The signs often are clear. You take on more responsibilities than you should. You're the performer in the relationship, sacrificing more than you're receiving. Your partner has become a spectator.

You initiate conversations, plan outings, and activities that involve the two of you. You make financial plans and decisions. Every aspect of the relationship depends on you. Too much expectation is leaving you with no wriggle room, which explains your constant exhaustion.

2. You are inexplicably anxious

This is a mortifying fear in the pit of your stomach. You feel it. You recognize it. But you don't fully comprehend it. Or maybe you're choosing not to understand it.

This anxiety could be an implicit response to missing reciprocity from your partner. It's a protective mechanism, signalling the uncertainty of your relationship's future. This fear could be a discreet caution that you are uncushioned emotionally in your relationship.

Call it covert intel about how precariously your relationship is moving.

The fear usually is a call to action.

You must confront this fear. Explore this fear. Follow its trail to wherever it would lead you. Don't shrug it off and continue to look at the glass half-full. Decide to follow the doubt and uncertainties etched at the back of those fears.

Remember, dealing with anxiety alone can be ineffective. You should consider a shrink to help navigate your fears to find the underlying triggers.

3. You feel empty (and stagnant)

Different people experience this differently. Some feel empty, others feel stagnant - as though marking time without obvious progress.

It's typical for performers in a lopsided relationship to feel this way. Emptiness or stagnation is a common emotional response to heavy investment in a relationship without obvious gains in terms of recognition and growth.

Here, your partner doesn't fill you up the same way you fill them up. You make time for them. You are present and strive to be involved in their lives. You put in the effort to reach out to them. Make constant thoughtful attempts to build a solid relationship. You go beyond yourself to make them happy. But tables when turned, they are doing very little in same regards for you.

They don't pour out into you as much as you pour yourself into them.

In simple terms, your well is drying up.

Your incentives are dwindling, and your energy for the relationship is diminishing. The effects are rippling to other areas outside your romantic life. - work life, social life, and whatnot.

You consider your partner's love and affection contrived or inadequate. Your relationship feels like you're swimming against the tides. You feel stuck, even with earnest effort.

4. You initiate communications

One partner initiating and sustaining communication is a clear sign of a lopsided relationship.

In your chat conversations, you're always the one inquiring about them and their dealings. Your partner is only reactive and rarely inquires about your affairs.

If your call logs are any indications, it shows there are more outgoing calls from you to them than incoming calls from them. Admittedly, they could have a busy life to commit their entire day calling you. But one-way phone calls are surely a glaring sign of an unbalanced relationship.

Another noteworthy sign of a one-sided relationship is your partner acts shallow and dodgy in sharing information. They know more about you than you know about them. Yo have questions and doubts about personal and important areas of their lives, including family, career, ambitions, etc.

If they've shared with you any personal and important information about themselves, ask them again. Probably they weren't being truthful. They only told you something to shut you up.

Note that busyness is their resort tactic to avoid deep and intimate conversations with you.

Closing Thoughts

One-sided relationships should be easy to spot. But it appears not always the case for the players of the love game. People become emotionally entangled, abandoning logical reasoning. They ignore the red flags. They hold on to optimism, expecting a positive mindset and one-sided commitment to bring about change to their relationship and partners. But that hardly happens.

Remember that balance is important: you must see them, and they must see you.

Assessing your relationship objectively and rationally periodically is essential. Start today. Figure out if you're wading in a one-sided relationship by considering these symptoms

1. You constantly feel overwhelmed
2. You are inexplicably anxious
3. You feel empty (and stagnant)
4. You initiate all communications