4 Signs You're a Perfectionist & What To Do About It

If you think you're a perfectionist and worry for a moment with just a few thoughts, don't worry. By understanding some of the signs and learning to ease yourself, you can probably reduce the stress you are feeling and accept results that are not right for you. As Health Central pointed out, perfectionism has its good points. It is your desire to work hard to be successful. Think a little about the goals you set yourself. Are they reasonably achievable? According to Health Central, you may find yourself constantly stressed by continuing unrealistic activities. Focus on what you can achieve and use your willpower to get there. For those who can relate to me about this, here are seven signs that you are a perfectionist and why it's okay.

1. You always try to please others (and yourself)

If you are one of the teachers, parents, and / or children who please and impress yourself, always aiming for a high score, consider this the first sign of perfectionism. Psychologist Monica Ramirez Basco told the Huffington Post that one of the main problems with this idea as a kid is that if things don't go the way you want, it can frustrate you in the future. rice field.

"Pursuing perfection can be painful because it is often caused by both the desire to do well and the fear of the consequences of what goes wrong," Basco said. Shatter those fears and remember that it is absolutely impossible for everything to always go perfectly. Expecting it is to live in fantasy.

2. You have the idea of ​​"all or nothing".

Dr. Elizabeth Lombard, a clinical psychologist, best explains the idea of ​​"all or nothing" in her article on everyday health. She said she messed up the meal with one cookie and then-because you've already blown it-may be as easy as picking an entire cookie packet. Lombardo also used the example of not having enough time to meditate for 30 minutes, so she isn't meditating at all ... it's all or nothing.

This is very common in perfectionist thinking patterns, but if you relax a little with this harsh thinking, it's easy to understand that the world doesn't always have to work in black and white like Lombardo mentioned above. .. Instead, it's very comfortable in the gray zone.

3. Unknowingly set criteria for how others should act.

Health Central said the main sign of perfectionists is that they tend to set standards for how others should behave, in addition to the standards they hold. rice field. It may mean having the judgment and judgment of others, especially when you strive for the perfection of everything around you.

According to Psych Central, it may also mean treating them harshly when you are impatient with others and their actions do not match what you want them to do. You can have your own standards, but be generous with the standards of others. There is no way to control the behavior of others, so don't emphasize it.

4. Not particularly open to feedback

Receiving critical feedback as a perfectionist is like being thrown into the middle of the ocean like a non-swimming person. According to Lombardo, perfectionists often see feedback as an attack on their core values, which can lead to feelings of embarrassment.

Lombardo said: Even a simple comment like "may have tried X" is interpreted in his mind as "you are worthless". When such critical comments come in, you may cry or yell at you and overdo it. According to Lombardo, the best way to deal with this is to stop correlating feedback directly with your value and use it instead to move you forward.