3 Things I Endured Being Older & Unmarried - 64 Yr Old Bride Explains

For many of us while growing up in this world as we know it, we are taught that there is a 'life cycle', a correct progression on how life is supposed to go. You're born, you go to school, you get a good job, and eventually you get married and start a life of your own, preferably in your 20s or at the latest in your 30s.

But what happens when life has different plans and a person doesn't end up following this 'life cycle'? The subject of today's story, Erumena Amata found the love of her life and got married when she was the age of 64. Now, in a new interview with the BBC, Erumena is opening up about the kinds of things and comments she endured being a woman who was unmarried deep into her 60s. Here's what Erumena said.

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1. The Comments

According to Erumena (who spoke it in Pidgin which I've now translated to normal English for clarity purposes although the original video in pidgin still at the bottom of this post for whoever is interested in that),

They said, 'this one you will not marry,' that 'even if you see a husband to marry, 1) he'll be shorter than you, 2) even if he's not shorter than you, you will be like almost 10 years older than the man because you will not see somebody your age to marry. But has God not done it now? Has God not done it now? The man that I married is tall and not only is he tall, he's older than I am. Isn't that the work of God?

2. The Disappointment

Erumena said that when she went to weddings of her friends, while she danced and was happy for them, she couldn't always help but wait for her own. She said:

When my friends went ahead to marry, I was happy o! I followed them to rejoice. It was me that dance passed everybody. But every year I would say this December, I will spend this December in my husband's house. December will come and go and that is how it has been happening all this time till now 2021.

3. Watching a child grow and get married

Erumena said that the hardest thing for her was watching a child that had been placed in her custody grow from childhood into adolescence then adulthood, and getting married before her. She said:

The thing that pained me the most was that they gave birth to a child in my arms. That child grew, not only did they grow, they now married and I was there in the marriage. They now gave birth and I still carried that their new child. Imagine the kind of feeling a person would get, imagine the kind of pain.

Now, Erumena is married to a pastor who she describes as 'calm and understanding'. He's a widower whose wife passed away ten years ago, and Erumena says that the minute she stepped into his house in Warri, she knew that she was home. Everywhere was just to her taste and when she saw the coconut trees, plantain trees, scent leaves, water leaves, lemon grass, she just knew she was home.

Erumena's story is proof that there is no rules to this life and that life will happen how and whenever it will happen. Also, it is a reminder to never stop waiting or believing in your dreams while at the same time also celebrating the wins of others. It is such a beautiful story and I'm happy for Erumena and her new husband.

Happy married life!

That's All.

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Until next time, have a wonderful rest of your day.