10 signs they secretly hate you.

1. Backhanded compliments.

Does this person ever follow up a compliment with if or for? “You'd be so successful if you tried harder.” “You're so good-looking for a fat person.” The chance is big that they're trying to keep you "in your place", because they don't want you to realise your worth and surround yourself with better people. 9/10 times this person actually believes you are better or have the potential to be better than they'll ever be. This person is just a weight tied to your ankle. Unfortunately this is the most common with family members.

Advice: Tell them you're good enough the way you are.


2. Constant criticism.

While some choose to hide their criticism behind backhanded compliments, some openly criticize you to make you doubt yourself. They usually use the phrases “Wouldn't you rather hear it from me than a stranger?” or “I just want what's best for you.” These people are not to be trusted. They are not trying to build you up, they are keeping you small. Usually these people are projecting their own insecurities onto you. They pick at your "flaws", because they feel powerless about their own. These are not good people to surround yourself with.

Advice: Tell them that only you get to choose who you are and you love yourself.


3. They hate everyone else you're close to.

Have you ever noticed that this person gets upset when you talk about other people? This usually comes from the belief that you will at some point find out that they hate you and leave them for better people. Sometimes they're even actually tryingnto get yoj away from them so they can swoop in and steal those other people from you. They just find so many things to say about the people you love. They also encourage you to ditch them and constantly meddle in your affairs.

Advice: tell them that you love those people and that if they truly love you, they won't make you go against them.


4. They only talk about themselves.

I think we've all met that person that is constantly playing the victim and doesn't care about what's going on in your life. This person is most likely using you so they have someone to vent to and they will complain about you behind your back. This person is untrustworthy and thinks you're a background character in their life. Do you really want to be around someone that treats you like a free therapist?

Advice: interrupt them during their monologue and ask if you could get a word in for once or just say you gotta leave. Their response says a lot about how they see you.


5. They're only nice to you when they need something from you.

So let's say there's something you're really good at and this person knows that. Do their messages always start with “Hey can I ask you a favour?”? Well they're using you. Especially if they usually don't speak to you or they are extra fake nice when they need something. You should be around people who love you for who you are, not just what you do for them.

Advice: tell them you can't do what they ask of you and ask them if they want to hang out anyway. If they make excuses or respond coldly, you know enough.


6. They get upset at your happiness, especially when it's without them.

It's a serious red flag when someone only smiles at you when you're upset. Some people might wonder if those people even exist; they do. So this person can usually only muster a wry smile when they say they're happy for you, but can't contain themselves when you're actually in pain. Yeah, no. This person CLEARLY does not have your best interest in mind.

Advice: ask them if they're actually happy for yoy and keep asking until they reveal the truth. If they get angry or play the victim instead, ditch them.


7. They compliment your partner too much or are your partner and compliment literally everyone more than you.

I doubt this one needs explaining, but this person definitely doesn't love you the way they are supposed to. And I don't mean a “their hair looks nice” compliment, no I mean “I would definitely do nsfw things with that person, because they look absolutely delicious” compliments. It's absolutely terrible. Never let someone treat you like this.

Advice: ask them if they really think it's appropriate that they're saying things like this and if they justify their behaviour, tell them that the fact that they don't see what's wrong with their behaviour is already a gigantic red flag.


8. They threaten you or use violence.

Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, that truly loves you would want you to fear them. Please tead that again. This is not and will never be an appropriate love language. Fear is not love. Violence is not love. Force is not love. Love is built on mutual respect and this person trying to hurt you just proves that they don't love you.

Advice: alert someone you trust and can confide in. If you don't have someone like that, there are many anonymous online local hotlines you can talk to and they can help you get away from this person.


9. They constantly one-up you and compare themselves to you.

Have you ever met the type of person that would wear a wedding dress to your wedding? Yes, that kind of a-hole. I literally would rather eat a dirty used up sponge than stan someone this horrid. People like this are convinced they are literally way better than you and that you can never have anything for yourself. 19/20 times they will start crying when you address their behaviour, they're not worth your time.

Advice: cut them off and don't give them the time to explain anything. They will play the victim and cry regardless, so just throw them out and be your gracious self.


10. They're ungrateful of everything you do for them.

People like this will never give you the recognition you deserve for all you've done for them. It's not worth it. No matter how much you try to please them, they step on you. It's time to move on, they secretly hate you.

Advice: stop doing the things you used to do for them and watch them learn about gratefulness.



If you've made it to the end of this, THANK YOU FOR READING! No matter who secretly hates you, I LOVE YOU!🌼