Masturbation is something women shouldn't be ashamed of.
It is a tunnel that we should all cross to better understand how we experience pleasure, and to take responsibility for our body.
If we take the time to consider what aspects of masturbation can benefit us, we may find a way to enjoy ourselves without depending on a man (or another woman).
I know this very well because I started exploring my body at the age of 12. This did not make me a more or less promiscuous person, but I am sure it is one of the reasons why I do not feel that I need a partner to be whole.
Today I want to give you a couple of reasons to make masturbation a method of self-knowledge, based on my personal experience.
1. When you masturbate, your pleasure does not depend on anyone
"I am too intelligent, too demanding, and too resourceful for anyone to be able to take charge of me entirely. No one knows me or loves me completely. I have only myself"
– Simone de Beauvoir
Your pleasure. No one else's.
The goal of masturbation is to discover yourself and to find pleasure within an individual experience.
When you masturbate, you can feel the same pleasure as when you have sex, but the feeling of intimacy is different. A new layer of self-consciousness develops.
You may even discover that it is not certain stimuli that annoys you when you are in bed with someone, but the way that person touches you and tries to possess your body, forgetting about your soul.
Women tend to have fewer orgasms than men. In fact, some of them never achieve orgasm with their husbands, but discover a surefire way to feel pleasure when they touch themselves.
This is simply because women need arousal before sex. Still, men tend to focus on penetration and not on the pre-stage.
Female masturbation comes to be a liberating experience that helps you understand that you are not to blame for not feeling pleasure when you have sex with a particular person. You are not guilty, but the main injured.
You are not a "Fuck Machine", but a sensitive creature with emotional needs. Let the world deal with it.
2. When no one else sees you naked, something interesting happens
"It's not my responsibility to be beautiful. I'm not alive for that purpose. My existence is not about how desirable you find me."
– Warsan Shire
When no one sees you naked, you discover that you can feel immense pleasure no matter what your body looks like.
If a woman learns to enjoy herself through masturbation, she will begin to understand that she does not need a slimmer body or larger breasts to have a full intimate life.
If you've had a hard time accepting your body your entire life, I think masturbation can help you a lot in the process because nobody can give you pain, hurt or humiliation when pleasure depends on you.
3. Masturbation helps you free your mind and creativeness
"I hate to hear you talk about all women as if they were fine ladies instead of rational creatures. None of us want to be in calm waters all our lives."
– Jane Austen
Masturbation is all about the self, and it does not take conscious thinking.
Let me clarify that it is not just about feeling physical pleasure, but about starting a journey of personal transformation. As Pamela Madsen writes in Psychology Today:
Consider the potential of sexual arousal to fuel self-transformation. This is what most women are really seeking when they see a therapist or buy a book on orgasm. They are wanting more, and somehow they know that it's there, in their own bodies. Perhaps they have seen it in other women, the French refer to it as "je ne sais quoi," it's a woman who sparkles from within.
Women can learn how to enjoy masturbation by letting go, enjoying their body, and appreciating the experience.
With the right amount of time, you can learn how to love yourself entirely, but you will also reconnect with the art of flowing and living without worrying about the consequences of everything you do.
So give yourself some pleasure today, you deserve it.
About the Creator
rtis
I write to put my pieces together.
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