Fantasies...

You don't know, that the fantasy has been the same for years but I have always been looking for the best man to fill the role. For months, it was him, his eyes, those beautiful blue eyes. He didn't know and I would never tell you that the thought of you is what gave my mind a place to go where anything was possible. I know you didn't even do anything to apply for the role but just the way you spoke to me quickly made you the star of every fantasy I have ever had, the way you stood there a beacon in the hurricane that was more a heroine in need of a Hero, my hero. They were more than just lust, but dream to be felt. They were fantasies of you , coming home from work, me sleepily waking up and asking how was your day. You smiling and saying that I didn't need to worry about it. Me needing you, needing you to be close enough to make me feel something other than the numb. Lying in bed, in a tank top and panties craving you like I always do. 

 Watching you take off your duty belt, secure your gun and take off your uniform. The heat, rising in me as I blushed with need. You saying "Babygirl come here." Me smiling and pulling you on top of me. Then it began..the love drunk passion as you consumed ever part of me. The feel of skin, on skin. Your hand slowly sliding up my neck. Me begging you to make me come. Your hand closing around on my throat. My breathing stopping as our bodies bucked with passion. The feeling of complete and sweet surrender as your name passes my swollen lips. 

 A judge wanted me to marry a man like you. He would turn away in shock at the carnal knowledge you have of my body whenever you please, however you please. The text messages I send you during the day, hoping for this very moment. 

  I held on to those in the moments you were my only escape from the insanity of the every day. For months, fantasies of us alone playing house, baking for you, fucking you. Those eyes were my anchor. The quickest I could I came to you. I needed you to rescue me from what no one else has. I wasn't yours and you were not mine but it could have been. A sheriff deputy would get the girl. 

 It wasn't you that I had hoped would come when I went to you. It was the opposite of you. So another chance faded away. 

 Then you were replaced in my dreams by another. Same accidentally meeting, same moment of connection. Finally safe somewhere, finally it was over. He reminded me of my ex boyfriend, strong and kind, in charge of the situation so I didn't have to be. That moment turned into the fantasy of everything I ever knew coming back to me and home. His skin on mine, every curve, every inch safe in his arms. Nothing more than a fantasy of everything I ever wanted, ever needed. 

 Then there was you. The perfect way you calm my mind, and entwine my heart merely with a few written words, I read between the lines and know enough to see your heart and bravery. To have moments late at night when I can't sleep where I pretend my head is on your chest, I am wrapped in your arms after you have taken what you need from my body for us. The way I look at you tells it all, the way my heart and body feel bound to you. You my protector, me your submissive. I will never tell you the way I see you. It isn't my place. You are not mine but I am still yours. I can't help but want you, I can't help but trust you, I can't help but think about what I would let you do to me, conquer my body like you have my mind. The thought of your disapproval kills me as it should. However the images that I create in my mind are of things you would never forget and sins I need you to commit. I never like the bad boys, they never pass my mind, but the good guys like you fill holes that need to be stitched together. The wounds of pain filled with love and lust that forever chain us. 

 Even on the bad days, like today lying in bed alone sick from a migraine, I crave everything about you. You would think a migraine would make it lessen, would stop the hunger for you. It doesn't. It makes it more, because I am weak, that is when I need your strength, like a succubus. I need your energy to be able to be strong enough for battle again. I need to recharge. The heat only makes it worse. The fire inside of me for you and the physical heat only make the insatiable hunger multiply. 

When you treat me like a princess, especially when I am weak, it makes me want you even more. It makes me need you, even more. There is something about you I can't get out of my mind. It invades every moment of my existence without you. I can almost feel your hands on my thighs, and on my body, had you simply spoken to me a second time it could have been reality. Our reality. My King, my worshipped one. The one I trust with my life. The one who conquers the dragons, and steals the princesses to safety to become the greatest love story this world has ever seen. To have you by my side as we conquer evil and rewarded with all that a King deserves, to be the creator of my universe, who takes the princess to bed every night and does things that others have lusted for eons.