Card Game Fantasy

Jenny is a twenty-seven-year-old blond-haired, brown-eyed Chicago native. She traveled to New York to pursue a career in acting, but quit when she found it too competitive. Now she makes good money as a waitress at a ritzy hotel restaurant. Her success with her high-end clients at the hotel has landed her side jobs at their charity events and casino nights.

"I've always acted out my sexual fantasies, and for the longest time I couldn't understand why other people didn't do the same thing. When I was acting I had tremendous rushes of power. I felt very turned on to everything and everyone. Some of my best sex happened after I had performed in a play—I guess I was still wrapped up in make-believe and really let myself go. One of my last serious relationships ended when I decided that the acting career wasn’t a thing anymore. Sex with my (now ex) boyfriend wasn't much fun by this time, because naturally I couldn't be happy with a man who'd witnessed my ambitions come to nothing. Selfish? Of course, but I'd never pretended to be anything more than I was. Now I fantasize a lot. If I'm working a side job for one of the restaurant customers at a casino night, I pretend I'm really a high-priced call girl. If I like the looks of one of the men who comes into the club, I make a date with him, but the real excitement comes from imagining that I'm an expensive and sexy prize."

Stakes are High

"My favorite fantasy involves a high-stakes card game where I'm the prize. I imagine myself getting ready for the game. I take hours making myself beautiful. I wear the sort of thing a movie star in the 40s would have on—a black sheath dress, very low cut and tight in the waist, sheer black stockings, high heels, and a white mink coat. As I smooth perfume over my throat and between my breasts, my hands tremble with excitement. Promptly at 8:00 PM a limousine arrives to take me down to the private club where the game is being held. I am escorted up to the game room by a uniformed guard. I pass through the oak door and find that all eyes are on me. 'Gentlemen—the prize!' the guard says, and he leads me to a velvet couch, gives me a glass of champagne, and touches his cap. The men sit at a table covered with green baize, in a room with blazing chandeliers, oak paneling, and floor-to-ceiling mirrors. In front of them are enormous piles of money. Somebody reads the rules: $100 ante and unlimited raises—straight poker. Thousands are riding on the game... on me!"

"The men begin to play, and I watch. They are all attractive, elegant—but there's one who especially appeals to me. He's the classic tall, dark, and handsome, and I like the way he holds his cards. I can picture his hands on my body. The very thought turns me on. I want him to win—want it so much I almost moan with disappointment when he loses a hand. My skin feels sensitive—tingly. Every time I recross my legs, little jolts of excitement run up my thighs. I make sure to do it extra slowly so that he may get a glimpse of my panties. I sip my champagne and try to look cool, but my face is becoming flushed, and I'm sure there are beads of perspiration on my upper lip. I can't control my breathing very well. I keep thinking about what his penis would look like, about how it would feel if he undressed me very slowly and let his big, elegant hands run over every inch of me. He's got to win—and soon! I'm too excited to sit much longer, waiting... waiting..."

"At last they play aces to open, and the pot gets so huge that it's clear that everyone but the winner will be wiped out. One by one they turn over their hands. My man is the last to show. The guy next to him has a full house—jacks and kings—and my heart almost stops. Slowly, teasingly, my man turns his cards over. Straight flush. For the first time he turns to look at me directly, smiling straight into my eyes. He pockets the money—thousands!—and gets up from the table. Knees weak with desire for him, I smile. 'Well, gentlemen,' he says, 'looks like I'm the lucky man.' Then he gives me his arm. 'Shall we?' he murmurs. I turn with him, and together we walk from the room. Every eye is on us. That's it. The sex part isn't what turns me on. It's the game—the fact that they're playing for me."

Doctor Cartham's Comments

"Good sex" comes from feeling good about ourselves, as well as feeling fully involved in what we're doing. Some of us experience such self-esteem and involvement in our daily life in both relationships and jobs. Fantasy can either enhance those feelings we already have, or make up for what we lack. Fantasy is tuning in to turn on, not just to sex, but to ourselves in general.

When Jenny was acting, she let herself get fully absorbed in what she was doing and gained a sense of worth, power, and self-esteem—the very feelings that make sex good, too! Now, withdrawing from her career and her relationship, she uses the stage of her mind to re-create the sense of involvement that she once got from life. Jenny's imaginary performance turns her on in the same manner her real performances once did. Her fantasy has all the pomp and flair of a Hollywood production.

Acting the make-believe on our mind-stage requires the same absorption, commitment, and creativity—and results in the same turn-on—as acting the make-believe onstage with a real audience. Fantasy is drama where everything is controlled by the fantasizer. There are no casting directors to win over, no audiences to please, and no other actresses with whom to compete. In her fantasy, Jenny sets her own stage and stars in the scene to regain the sense of self she once felt in her real life—admired, desired, and prized.

The world of real or imagined theater can be either separate from or integrated into reality. Jenny escapes, like a Cinderella, from her humdrum life as a hatcheck girl into the exciting role of a high-class call girl. She can learn a great deal about herself by examining the play she produces in her fantasy. While fantasy itself does not change our reality, the clearer the picture in our minds of where we would like to be physically and emotionally, the closer we are to achieving it. In this way, we are able to write, produce, direct, and star in our own play of life—and it's guaranteed to be a hit.