Awkward First Romance

Chapter 5: Alex

Well I’ve jerked it three times and I am still wanting more. I’ve been trying to sleep for over an hour now. I can’t believe I kissed him on the cheek. What’s more is I can’t believe what it has done to me. I can’t stop thinking about how great it felt to kiss him on the cheek. I can only imagine what a real kiss would be like. This confirms it for me. I am completely attracted to my best friend. I can’t say I’m gay. I just know I am sexually attracted to Jack. I should clean myself up but I am finally tired. I close my eyes and drift off to sleep.

The next morning I wake up to the sound of my Dad calling me down for breakfast. Crap, I’m naked and have dry cum all over me. I grab my athletic shorts and shirt from yesterday and put them on. I’ll just have to shower after breakfast. I make my way down to the dining room but stop when I hear Jack and Dad talking. “You never did answer my question last night.” I hear Dad say.

“Yes I wanted to avoid it but to answer your question . . . yes I do.” What is he saying yes to? Is it about what happened with us? I thought everything was ok now. “Do you feel better getting that off of your chest? I support it and I hope for the best, truly I do.” Dad says. What are they talking about?

“I’m worried about how Alex will react.” Jack says. So they are talking about me. What is it? Why are either of them hiding something from me? “I wouldn’t worry about Alex, you know him. He cares about you more than himself. Nothing you say or do will ever make him hate you. If anything it will bring you two even closer.” Dad says in a reassuring way to Jack. What exactly is it that Jack is doing or will do that might make me hate him?

I walk the rest of the way in and greet my Dad and Jack. I take a seat next to Jack. He is blushing and looking away. I really want to know what is going on. It’s kind of frustrating that there is a secret my Dad and best friend are keeping from me. I act normal and try to stir the conversation during breakfast but everyone is being quiet but me. The air is thick with awkwardness.

“Dad, are you leaving tonight or tomorrow morning?” I ask. “Tonight around nine. I put money in your account for food and stuff while I’m gone and you have the credit card. Please be responsible with it. No party.” I roll my eyes. I’m usually good about not indulging.

“So it’s just going to be me and you? For how long?” Jack asks. Is that nervousness I sense in his voice? “I’ll be gone for a few days at a medical conference. I’m sure you two will find ways to keep busy.” Dad says. What does he mean by that? I look at Jack who has no color in his face. Is he coming down with something? I put my hand on his forehead. “Are you ok? You look sick.” I say with concern.

Jack is frozen in place. “I’m fine. I just didn’t think we’d get to have the house to ourselves. Me and you. Just us.” I take my hand off of his head. “Yea. I was going to tell you today. I thought we could do a Star Wars Marathon, only the numbered movies.” I say. I liked Star Wars and Jack loved it. It is probably one of his favorite things in the world.

“That sounds awesome. We haven’t done a marathon in a while.” In truth I had to come up with a new plan since the original plan of seeing if maybe he wanted me the way I wanted him isn’t going to happen. Star Wars was the first thing that popped into my head. The rest of breakfast is spent chatting about random things. Finally the odd tension is gone. Though Jack is still acting weird.

Afterwards I head up and shower in my bathroom because I need to not have dried crusty shit all over my abdomen and thigh. I kept thinking of Jack and had to relieve myself again in the shower. I truly wanted him to be mine in every sense of the word. I also wanted to be his. I clean up and get out of the shower. I close my door and lock it so Jack doesn’t walk in while I change. As I am putting on fresh clothes for the day I can’t help but notice my lube is out on the nightstand. I know I didn’t leave it out last time I jerked it in my room. Did Jack really do that in my bed?

I find myself turned on and irritated at the same time. I can just picture him stroking himself and crap I’m hard again. I get ready to hop on my bed and pleasure myself real quick when I hear knocking on the door. Jack needed in for clothes. I’m in athletic shorts so I can’t really cover my erection. “Screw it.” I say before unlocking the door and letting Jack in.

He looks me up and down. “Didn’t realize you were showering.” I look away and rub the back of my head. “Yea, I was dirty and gross from yesterday.” I turn away because I am still hard as can be. There is no way he doesn’t notice. Jack stands in front of me. “Hey, I just wanted to really apologize again for yesterday. You’re my best friend!” Jack says before suddenly pulling me into a hug. Oh god no! My erection completely crashes into him as he pulls me tight.

There is a long pause as I feel Jack tense. “Dude . . . are you . . . are you hard right now?” He asks. I feel the heat rise to my cheeks. I push him away a little. “Uh yeah, I was going to ya know and then you knocked. I wasn’t expecting you to pull me in a hug.” Jack’s face turns beet red and he backs away. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to, um it’s not weird or anything . . . I mean totally normal!” Oh he is panicking.

“I know it's normal man. I just didn’t want you to know I was about to. Let’s not talk about it. The last thing I want is my Dad coming up and seeing me with a tent.” I say. I hope Jack will drop it now. I could be an ass and bring up, I know he jerked and came all over my bed but I don’t want to add to the awkward situation.

The rest of the morning is without incident and I lock the door as Dad leaves for work. I hope Jack won’t be mad but I have plans today with a couple of friends from the football team. Kyle and Landon. They’re gay, no one else knows. They told me last year after we won the homecoming game. I remember they were so scared to tell me but I told them how happy I was for them. I need them now for advice.

Jack is sitting on the couch in the living room and typing away on his phone. “Hey.” I begin as I sit down. Jack looks up. “What’s up?” He asks. “Don’t be mad, but I have plans with Kyle and Landon. It won’t be all day, just for lunch. Afterwards we can go hangout and do something.”

“That’s cool, I was going to ask if you could drop me at the mall anyway. Me and Megan are going to shop for some stuff and then get lunch. How about we go see Jurassic World 3 later?” He asks. That sounds good to me. “Yea, how about I get you at the mall at 3?” Jack nods in agreement. That’s good. That is one less thing I have to worry about.

I look at the clock, it’s already 10. I ask Jack if he is ready and when he says yes, I usher him out the door so we can get going. I drop Jack off at the mall and make my way to Landon’s house. He and Kyle were in his pool. Luckily I had a pair of trunks in my car and I am able to get in the pool with them. They decided on pizza poolside for lunch. Which was fine with me.

I look at my friends and they make me smile. They are adorable together. I can honestly say I have no physical attraction to either which is why I am so confused about Jack. I am attracted to him. I hold off on the deep stuff until after the pizza arrived and we were eating in the pool. Kyle was in a pool chair with his sunglasses on. He had a slice in one hand and a can of coke in the other. Lucky for him the chair had a cupholder.

“So what did you need to talk to us about? You made it sound urgent.” Landon asks. I swallow the pizza I have in my mouth and take a drink of coke. “When did you guys realize you were gay?” I ask. They stare at me like I grew another head.

“Well . . . I was watching the Vampire Diaries and saw Kol Mikaelson and found myself wanting him to rip my throat out and pound me into the bed. Not sure how Kyle found out.” Landon says. Kyle lowers his sunglasses. “Mine isn’t as demented, I was curious and looked up porn and realized I 100% wanted that. Then I met Landon Freshman year when we both got to the team and we flirted for a couple of years before I finally built up the courage and just kissed him.” Kyle says fondly. He reaches for Landon who returns the smile and takes his hand.

They look at me and in unison ask why. “I think I might be gay or at the very least, in love with Jack.” Kyle laughs and shakes his boyfriend’s hand. “I knew it! You owe me dinner at Titanic!” Kyle exclaims.

“Excuse me?” I say. I’m a little confused. Landon sighs. “I bet Kyle a year ago that you weren’t in love with Jack and just an overly affectionate friend. If I won I get to top for a month. If he won I will pay for an OVERLY expensive dinner at Titanic.” Titanic is a great restaurant. Dad is friends with the owner so we get dinner there whenever we want. We pay full price but there is always a table ready for us.

“I’m glad my romantic life is a game. Come on, help me guys. You’re the only ones I can talk to. Am I gay? I mean I jerked off to him f . . . . well the amount of times are not important.” I say with a fierce blush.

Kyle chuckles. “I can’t say if you’re gay but maybe bi with an emphasis on Jack. You just have to explore. Watch porn, fool around with a friend. Landon do you think-” Kyle begins and Landon shoots him a glare. “No.” Landon smiles at me. “No offense, but you’re hotter than me.” I blush.

“I appreciate that but I’m good. It would be weird to do anything with you guys. I’ll give the porn a try. My Dad is also out of town, I thought about seeing if Jack wanted to try something but I’m afraid he will not agree and hate me.”

This time Landon laughs. “Dude I love you, I really do but you’re the only person who doesn’t see how much he loves you. He goes to every single game of yours and you play three sports, man so that’s a year long gig. He hates sports. The way he looks at you is how Kyle looks at me.” Does he? I’ve never noticed any indication that he has feelings for me. What if they’re wrong? What if he is just affectionate like me and I end up looking like an idiot or our friendship is ruined?

“So how do I go about bringing up my feelings for him? Do I just tell him? Do I do some kind of romantic thing?” I ask. Kyle slurps down the rest of his coke and tosses it onto the concrete away from the pool. “I wouldn’t. You need to figure out yourself first. If you really aren’t into him sexually you could just end up hurting him.”

They’re right. I need to figure out what I feel first and if I am gay. I decide since I have an hour before picking up Jack, I can go back to the house and check out some stuff on the internet. I thank my friends for the advice and fun in the pool. I get out of the pool and dry off. I turn around before leaving. “You guys really think I’m hot?” I ask. I give them a wink and head out.

I drive home and run inside. Dad isn’t home which is great so I can really explore. I connect my phone to my tv in my room and search for some stuff on the internet. I look for a while until I find two guys who kind of look like me and Jack. I hit play and watch. The guys are kissing and I find myself getting hard already. I continue to watch as they strip their clothes off and begin to fool around. I slide my shorts and boxers down and my erect cock pops out. I grab the lube and lather myself as I begin to stroke myself to the porn.

Things really heat up in the video. They are doing so many things I now want to do to Jack. They were actually having sex now and I was pumping as hard and fast as I could to it. I felt myself getting closer to climax. The feeling of pleasure wells in me and as I get to the edge I picture me and Jack doing it. I release into my hand and all over myself! “Oh my God! This was the best!”

I grab one of my shirts on the floor and wipe myself clean. I check the time on my clock. I have time so I go hop in the shower so I can get clean and not smell like pool water. I hope this weekend goes well. I know for sure I want him.