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The Write Equipment

287th May, Story #148/366

By L.C. SchäferPublished 25 days ago Updated 25 days ago 3 min read
Top Story - May 2024

So many wannabe writers these days. I mean, yes, they write. So that makes them writers on some level, sure. But they aren't content just to pick up a pen, or sit down at a keyboard. Oh, no. They want recognition. Payment.

Poor buggers. Most of them have no chance. Not because they're bad, because lots of them are great. Not even because of the sheer volume of competition, even though, damn, there's a lot.

No, it's because they aren't using the right equipment.

I work for a well-known writer. I won't drop his (or her) name, but trust me, if I did, you'd know it. Ahh, heck it all, let's stick with "him", just to make it easier.

What do I actually do, you might ask. Well, I'm an inventor by trade, but my day job is assistant to this famous writer. I run errands, do odd jobs, help out. I see the process up close and personal. It helps me with other projects. I see what writers really need.

The secret: a specific typewriter or word processor you can use to churn out successful stories. I'm working on an attachment which does the same thing and will link up to any PC or laptop. I've got another that collects blood sweat and tears and feeds into the same device. That helps, but it's not enough. For a story to really sing, it needs flesh, blood and bone. Sacrifice. Soul.

In the morning, I bring him his coffee, help him wash and dress, wheel him to the desk.

"Are you ready?" I say. Sometimes he nods, grimaces. When he shakes his head and cries, I do my jolly hockey sticks school nurse act.

"Come on, you know it needs to be done. Are you going to do it, or shall I?"

Most days, we use this thing, like one of those lady shavers, but bigger. We get a good chunk off him, and feed it into the processor. This is what gives the story some juice. I patch him up while he sweats, bleeds and writes.

Occasionally, we need to lop off something more substantial. Half a finger. Last week, a leg.

Still wannabe a writer?

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Word count: (excluding author's note): 366

Submitted on: 27th May at 22:55

Edited to fix a typo. Apologies for the crazy typo in the subtitle!

*Quick Author's Note*

First, and most importantly:
thank you so much for reading my story! The ha'penny that Vocal will toss in my hat for your eyeballs landing on this humble piece will be well-spent. My tenth holiday this year, maybe. A golf course for guests.

If you enjoyed this one, the very best compliment you can give me is to
share it, or read another!

A Year of Stories: I'm writing a story every day this year. This one continues my 146 day streak since 1st January!

Please do consider lending your support to the other creators who are also on this madcap "a story every day" adventure. They are putting out excellent content every day!

Rachel Deeming

Gerard DiLeo

Leave a comment: Please do leave me a comment. It makes it easier for me to reciprocate the read.

The story behind the story: Not telling you which author I imagined carving up into little pieces. Imagine your own!

“There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.”

― Ernest Hemingway

Thank you

Thank you again, most especially if you are one of the wonderful people who has been staunchly reading these daily scribbles since the start of the year. I see you, and appreciate you very much indeed! 😁

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About the Creator

L.C. Schäfer

Book-baby is available on Kindle Unlimited

Flexing the writing muscle

Never so naked as I am on a page. Subscribe for nudes.

Here be micros

Twitter, Insta Facey

Sometimes writes under S.E.Holz

"I've read books. Well. Chewed books."

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Reader insights


Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

Top insight

  1. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

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Comments (43)

  • Murali18 days ago

    Congratulations on your story being a Top Story in May 2024!

  • Mark Graham18 days ago

    Yeah, to be a writer you must have the right equipment even if you only write a few words a day at least you are writing. To be honest I hope you read my work on Critique and please comment it would truly be appreciated.

  • Fantastic writing.

  • Andrea Corwin 21 days ago

    All I can say is WTH! Wow. 🤩 🤩

  • Sweileh 88821 days ago

    Interesting and delicious content, keep posting more.

  • Novel Allen22 days ago

    Wait, the ha'penny is you and not Hannah, cause I have been honoring it to her every time I use it. I could not remember who for sure. It's all good. For a minute I thought this was real, got ready to chop off a finger or two. Whew! Kudos/congrats.

  • LC, back after 2 days for saying congrats!

  • shanmuga priya23 days ago

    Congratulations 🎉.

  • Babs Iverson23 days ago

    Magnificent microfiction and loved it!!!💕❤️❤️ Congratulations on Top Story!!!

  • The Dani Writer23 days ago

    That was that unexpected type of exciting! Cool! Well done on racking up another top story!

  • Back to say congratulations on your Top Story! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊

  • Raihana H.23 days ago

    This piece caught me off guard 😂 did not see that coming! Amazing creativity!

  • Real Poetic23 days ago

    What a story! I completely agree that being a writer requires a lot of hard work. Writers have to really love what they’re doing to keep on going. Congrats! 🎉 I enjoyed learning more about what you do.

  • JBaz23 days ago

    So messed just scared half the writers away and the other half are wondering why they didn't write this magnificent piece. Congratulations

  • Caroline Jane23 days ago

    Love this! Dark and bitter, just how I like my sweetmeats.

  • Ohhh such dark humor with a twisted end! Excellent 👌💕

  • Shirley Belk23 days ago

    very creative...poor nurse, though, having to chop off fingers and such! gasp

  • angela hepworth23 days ago

    Compelling and absurdly funny!!

  • D.K. Shepard23 days ago

    Yikes!! Definitely having second thoughts…Congrats on Top Story!

  • I liked this a lot, putting yourself into every story! That was great and I really didn’t expect that to be where it was going to go! An excellent short tale!

  • Heather Hubler23 days ago

    Loved the dark turn this took!! Great piece of fiction? I swear some days it could be non, lol. Congrats on TS and for being an inspiration :)

  • Amanda Starks23 days ago

    OH MY GOD, I thought I knew what I was reading, and then you start throwing words around likes bones, blood and sacrifice and I became so much more intrigued. I don't know what that says about me ( I'm a dark fantasy writer it really shouldn't be confusing ) but in all seriousness: this has to be one of my favorite pieces I've read on Vocal in a while!! The first line that really started the wheels churning in my brain ( and just an excellent line in general ) was this one: "For a story to really sing, it needs flesh, blood and bone. Sacrifice. Soul."

  • Donna Fox (HKB)23 days ago

    Back to say congrats on Top Story, Again!!!!!! 🎉

  • DragonFly23 days ago

    Nice one, dark yet funny. That's the personality of a scriptwriter. I don't understand how people can write a story every day. I can only write for a few minutes, and that too with months in between.

  • Cathy holmes23 days ago

    Congrats on the TS.

L.C. SchäferWritten by L.C. Schäfer

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