Ten Pin Bowling

This is a true story (starts next paragraph) based on an event in my life that I unfortunately had to endure thanks to my own stupidity. The moral of this story is if you’re struggling to get into a pair of pants, maybe it’s time to reconsider those pants. I love muffins as much as the next guy but that is no need to mudding top like your life depends on it. I also just want to add that if you desire to be in a situation I was in in this story please ignore this advice and continue on your way. Otherwise please enjoy this story as I wrote it from my heart, I call it a memory I’ll never forget but ten pin bowling felt more appropriate, Thank you.

T'was a windy summer night, I had just finished playing a game of tag in the back yard with my siblings. wet with sweat from running around as a chubby teenager, I hoped in the shower and prepared for the night ahead.

We were going bowling, I hadn't played at all at this point in my life, I had no idea what to expect, I dressed in my Sunday best, A tight pair of jeans to make sure everyone around me knew how hip I was and a baggy shirt to make sure people couldn't see that I was in fact hiding a muffin cause by my ill fitting jeans.

As soon as we arrived I knew I had made a bad decision wearing these jeans, that wasn't going to stop me from doing my best though, I had to win to make up for my terrible loss at tag earlier today. My aunty went to the count and handed cash over while I watched people play, seeing if there was anything I could learn.

We all sat down changed our shoes and this was the first mistake, I had told the guy behind the counter I was a size 8 in shoes, I was not. I was a nine and still to this day am in fact a size nine in women's shoes. All good, I'll power through this, if I can walk around in these jeans with no issues, I can wear these shoes that don't fit me.

After what felt like a lifetime, it was finally my turn to play, I did okay, not great but I got seven and finished up with only one left on the floor. The whole night unable to get a strike I figured it was time to put my heart and soul into my last play. I do a little run and I release the ball, Now I'm not sure which happened first but while releasing the ball my ill fitting jeans decided to also release my chubby little legs.

"Strike!" my Aunty informed me in an excited tone, I was dumbfounded, she didn't realise what had happened to me, had my baggy shirt been just big enough to hide my indecency? It had been, so instead of walking back I hid my shame and embarrassing, life altering incident. Holding my shirt down, unable to celebrate my strike, I sat down and waited, the cherry on top of all of this was the cold chair I had to sit on, no one brought it up which I thought meant I got away with it, until I had to explain to my mum why my jeans were ripped front to back. little did I know that yes in fact parents do do the washing and I should have just thrown those god forsaken jeans in the trash.