Sister of a Sister

One of the first people that can be there to inspire a woman is their mother. Anyone who grows up with their mother around them is given their first possibility for a role model, someone who brought them into the world and will help to lead them through it as they grow up. I was lucky enough to have my mother with me throughout my life, so there are many stories I could write about my experience with her.

This is NOT that story… But, it might as well be, because Bryanna, my older sister has acted like a mother figure throughout my life.

Bryanna was five years old when I was born, and everyone who was there told me that she was SO excited to get to be a big sister. So many of my oldest memories include Bryanna, with us playing games, her reading to me, looking after me when we were alone, we just spent so much of our time together. In fact, my most grumpy moments would be the times she didn’t want to hang out because she needed some time to herself. But, no matter how old we were, or what problems she would end up having, she always managed to make time for me.

Throughout my life Bryanna has been able to teach me things without even knowing. She would always read to me, and after a while I was able to read those same books because I learned the words and style of reading from her. I loved her presentation so much, that when it came time for school, I would be disappointed hearing other kids read, because they didn’t have the delivery that she had. When I really think about it, Bryanna was one of the first people to get me into creativity, not just with reading, but with public speaking and performing.

Growing up in a Catholic school and house, I also didn’t learn much about sexuality, and the first few things I was taught about them came from her. I came into the living room and saw a scene where two men were kissing and when I asked her what was going on she said that they were together. I didn’t understand it, because I had never heard of the idea of two men or two women dating each other. I thought it was weird, since it was a concept I knew nothing about. Well, Bryanna ended up fixing that too, talking to someone about how homophobia makes no sense because those people dating affects no one negatively. I wasn’t even a part of the conversation, and yet I still managed to learn something from it, without anyone else noticing.

A few years later, I began to realize that I may not just be an ally to the community, but actually a part of it. I didn’t know my exact identity, but I knew as soon as it came up, I would be able to trust Bryanna with it. She was the first person I told, and I had no fear telling her and I still feel her support for me to this day, talking about people I like, and even going to some events with me despite her anxieties.

That’s just who Bryanna is; someone who will support and care for those she loves, and do what she can to show it. She’s been a role model to me, even if we only have a few years of age difference between us. She’s my older sister, my best friend, and an amazing woman who made me into the queer black woman that I am today. She is my sister of a sister.