Blood makes you related, loyalty makes you family.
Thank You Mom
Dear Mom, There are so many things I would like to say to you, but sometimes the words are hard to get past my lips. So I write them to you. Even though you know how I feel, I feel this urge today, this need to leave on paper a trace of my love for you.
One cannot be too sentimental
People are emotional animals, this is an undeniable fact, it is because we are flesh and blood with feelings of people, so we will have a lot of distress and trouble from the emotional side of things. People do not have feelings not called people, but if people have too many feelings, will also become one of the important reasons for their own distress.
I Love You, Mom
In the second blog I ever wrote, I talked about how drastically different Father’s Day is perceived and celebrated compared to Mother’s Day. It was a funny little take on how Mother’s Day was the Super Bowl and Father’s Day was the Duke’s Mayo Bowl (which is an actual college bowl game). There have been seemingly endless number of commercials from jewelry stores, department stores and even day spas since April and with many states dropping mask and other COVID restrictions, restaurants and their parking lots will be overflowing with people giving their mothers a day out with a good meal.
A Mother's Love
This Mothers Day, we celebrate all the mothers in the world. The ones that are always there when we need them in our life. Mothers are the ones who take care of us when we are sick and when we need a shoulder to cry on when things are not going the way that they should. Our mothers are the ones we run to when we need advice about what to do when our children are acting out; and doing things that they should not be doing. She remembers one day when her children decided to become cooks with everything in her kitchen. She called her mother to find out what to do because she would have done something drastically wrong. After all, all the food that she had was now on her floor and everywhere else that you could think. Can you imagine five dozen eggs all over the floor, a bag of flour all over the children and on the floor? Now we sit here and make fun of the things that our children have done in the past because they are older! How we miss the things that we cannot have anymore. Not a day goes by that I do not miss talking to you and looking at your beautiful smile. You were the glue that kept this family together and talking. Now that you are not here, it seems as though our family has gone their separate ways from one another. We spend our lives arguing and fighting over the things that happened in the past, and sometimes it; is harder to let go of the past. It is hard to let go of the past and live our life the way we should because sometimes the past comes back into our hearts. It is part of our life, and sometimes you know that you should give in to the past because of the hurt and awful things that happened in our past life.
Dear Mother’s Pregnancy Journey
Dear Mother’s Pregnancy Journey, You met the partner you thought , you will spend the rest of your life with. You both decided to have children together.
A Letter to My Mama
Dear Mama, Mothers Day is approaching and I’ve found myself reflecting on how far our relationship has come. I started thinking about how grateful I am to finally feel able to celebrate you from a place of pure appreciation for all the things big and small you’ve done for me in the past two years and appreciation for the large role you now play in my every day to day life. I used to be jealous of my girlfriends who were close with their moms and chatted daily on the phone with them. I regret the time that I’ve wasted being mad or distant from you. We’ve had our highs and lows and in those lows, I would often ignore the urge to reach out to you and for that, I’m so very sorry. I’m learning now more than ever that becoming a parent is the hardest job in the world! There’s no instruction manual and you just have to try your hardest while it’s inevitable that you mess up along the way! We all just have to pray it all works out and our kids turn out okay. I’m sorry for ever putting you through hell as a teenager, disrespecting you and getting brave with my rebellion or disrespect. I’m sorry for not listening to you when you warned me I was making dumb choices just like you had made and regret yourself and choosing to make them anyways. I now have my own regrets that shadow yours that wouldn’t exist had I truly listened to you and heard you. I can’t imagine how frustrating for you that must have been. I’ve learned to turn these regrets into lessons, but sometimes it takes messing up and making mistakes a good six or more times for the lesson to really sink in. Im sorry you had to watch me go through those things while I recreated your own past and pain . I’m sure that couldn’t have been easy on you and now that I’m a mother, my heart aches for your mama heart. I wish we would have talked through those things more often. I’m sorry for any time I’ve ever hurt your feelings coming from a place of judgement and ignorance having never been a mother myself, yet. I’m sorry for the resentment I held towards you for years instead of working on my own healing and healing our relationship. More important than my apology, is my gratitude for showing me that people truly can change if they want to bad enough. Thank you for making me feel like I’m worth that effort. Thank you for trying harder to be more present in my life. Thank you for helping me so much with my babies. Thank you for doing all the little things you do for me what feels like pretty often these past few months, not one moment has gone unnoticed or unappreciated. Thank you for being the mom I’ve always wanted and needed. I’m so glad I get to talk to you every day now. I’m thankful you are always there for me to fill in and talk to about the serious stuff and the mundane things. It’s all equally important to me. I’m sorry if I have done a poor job of expressing how much you mean to me until now, but I thought it was long overdue. I would be lost without you! I’m so proud of the woman you have become. I have seen you grow emotionally and internally and now spiritually! Getting baptized with you on Easter Sunday was one of the best days of my life so far! I am so thankful to have such a special moment with you to cherish for the rest of my days. You have a loving and giving heart and you’ve put in the work to become more patient and present for those you love over the years and I see it and I’m grateful for it! You inspire me to continue to strive to become a better woman, mother, and daughter myself! I love you so much. Happy Mothers Day!
A Letter to mom
I was up early, making sure that I saw you before you went to work,before I went to school. I loved being with you in the morning time . It was so quiet and peaceful. Just us. I remebered you always had something pretty on,wether it was a dress and tennis shoes or jeans and a new flowy shirt. (As i'm writing this I'm actually realizing how much I get my fashion from you.) I also remember the smell of your perfume and how you'd sometimes spray just a tiny bit on my wrist, so that I could smell good like you. I even remeber the time, you didnt wake me up because you wanted me to get some extra sleep and when I woke up and realized that you had already left, I went nuts. I was crying, couldnt find my clothes, giving my big brother a hard time so we ended up missing the bus. My dad had to take us to school and I remember him being so confused as to why I was so upset. Running through my head was thoughts of never seeing my mom again. What if you got in a car wreck? What if you wouldnt be able to come home after work? Once I did see you after school I was so happy and you promised me you would never do it again, and you didnt. But, this particular morning was different. As you got the rest of your things like your lunch bag, your purse, and paper work together and began to finish the rest of your coffee you asked me out of the Blue, "What would you do if your little sister got hurt really bad, or if you weren't able to see her again?" My little eleven year old mild was caught off guard a bit. I wasn't sure, I hadn't thought about it before. I felt really sad. She observed me and asked once more, "What would you do?" I folded my arms and looked down mumbling the words, "I dont know." My little sister was so annoying to me, she always followed and always wanted to play with me. Whenever our cousins would come over, I would make sure that she had enough toys to herself, so that she wouldn't play with us and annoy us. I felt like she always got what she wanted,whenever she wanted, however she wanted it; it wasnt fair. She always got me in trouble when she would pass a lick and when I returned the favor, would cry to our parents, and I would get in trouble. I looked back up at you to read your expression.You leaned on the counter and said, "How would it make you feel?" "Sad." I replied "Blake, you only get one sister and she loves you very much, but you are so mean to her. You dont let her play with you and you always say "no" when she wants you to play with her. You are a big sister and you are not being a good one." My eyes watered a bit. I hadn't realized that she loved me, and wanted to play with me,or even cared about me. I only saw her as a annoying little sister. I looked back down at the White kitchen floor. You looked at me and said, " Think about what I just said Blake, long and hard." You hugged me as usual and told me to have a good day at school. I got ready and would take a look at my little sister as she got ready and felt so guilty. From that day on I made it my business to be a better big sister. I played with her more, to the point that I would ask her to play with her, shed get so excited. We ended making dance recitals ,plays, and movies on your ipad with our dolls. Momma that day you didnt just help me become a better big sister. But a better daughter, little sister, neice, cousin, woman, and person. You made me think twice before I speak and to be kind. To smile at strangers and to say hello to the "odd one out." To work hard, but never forget to stop and smell the roses, to always put a little perfume on and a cute outfit. Thank you, Momma.
I Thought You Should Know
People act as if being happy is as simple as saying -- hey, I'm happy -- and BOOM there goes the serotonin. It's full of fickle emotions, consciousness of the fact you are you, and that you could die at any moment. Life, for anyone, is terrifying. We are forced to figure out how to live and be satisfied within it, while our joy is weighed in personal choices of uncertain variables. The older I get; the more I get life. The more I get you. The more I am you.
Happy UNmother's day to you mum. xox
Dear Mum, This sunday will be Mother's day. But unfortunately there will be no mother's day present for you, no well wishes, nothing. It will be as if you had passed on...when you haven't. You're still very much alive, so instead I thought I would write this to you.
So Much More!
Motherhood entails so much more than I imagined. We cherish all the precious moments of our child’s life. We watch and help them through their days and continue to nurture throughout their milestones. Motherhood is full of experiences. It requires making changes, determination, patience, compassion and a lifetime of support.
A Day With My Father
There’s a little exercise that my Father likes to do. It’s called, “The Man In The Mirror.” I do not know the beginning of this concept, nor do I know its end. Sometimes, he likes to do this exercise all by himself. Other times, he does it with me or when I’m around. I remember the first time he ever did this. It was Sunday morning, and I was getting ready to step out when my Father stopped me in my tracks.
“Darn it! I can’t believe I killed another one.” Mom laughed. “Don’t worry. I’ll try and revive it for you.” I have no idea how she managed it, but she actually resurrected the plant. Its new life didn’t last too long but the plant lived for a few months before it decided it was better off without me.