Avoid awkward conversations with your child and open up your child's "conversation box"

In the past, I often heard parents such trouble: the children who used to love to talk, now become less and less talkative, usually, no matter what is asked, the child is either silent or with "um", "oh", "good "Such a simple word to respond, is simply the "golden mouth is difficult to open".

As we all know, the ability to express oneself is becoming more and more important for the future development of children, and the daily chat between parents and children is one of the important ways to exercise the expression ability of children. In the face of a child's lack of talk, many parents are worried that their child will become a non-verbal person in the future. So, what should parents do to avoid awkward conversations and open their children's "talk box"?

To open the child's box, parents just need to pay more attention to the way to chat with their children, which will often receive good results.

A parent with high emotional intelligence will be good at seizing the following four communication skills to open the child's "box".

01 Do not confuse chatting with lecturing

The two are not the same thing, simply put, chatting is chatting, and preaching is preaching, and the two should not be mixed up. But in reality, many parents turn chatting with their children into lecturing or questioning into chatting.

In the long run, children will certainly be reluctant to chat with their parents, and even if parents take the initiative to chat with their children, the phenomenon of awkward conversation is inevitable. The lack of normal communication between children and their parents is not a trivial matter over time, it not only affects the parent-child relationship but also leads to the lack of opportunities for children to talk and become inarticulate.

The root cause of this problem is that parents do not treat their children as an individual with independent personalities. Equal communication is one of the most important ways to open the child's voice. In this premise, parents in chatting with their children, one is to pay attention to creating a relaxed chatting atmosphere, not letting the child with a sense of tension chatting with parents; two from the child's concern about the topic of perspective, so that generally can quickly arouse the child's interest in chatting, both sides have something to say, not to make the child in the psychological sense of resistance so that the child in the chat to speak freely.

This is the case, generally, after the problem occurs, to make the child immediately realize where their problems are, parents promptly find the child to talk, at this time the child can be preaching, which is also very necessary. The tone of voice at this point is different from the relaxed tone of conversation; in most cases, it is earnest.

02 Let your child find a sense of accomplishment in chatting

My personal experience tells me that to open the child's box of conversation and let the child know everything, you must let the child find a sense of accomplishment from the chat, which will become the internal drive for the child to want to keep talking, and they will actively seek you out to chat next time.

For example, if a child finishes reading a book and finds the story interesting, he wants to share it with his parents, which means he already has an interest in chatting.

In addition, parents should also be appropriate to the child's ability to express themselves in the chat, whimsical ideas and other corresponding affirmation and encouragement, even if a little exaggerated, so that the child from a very ordinary chat can also experience a sense of accomplishment, so that the child will become more and more confident, greatly stimulating the desire to chat. The child will later take the initiative whenever he or she has the opportunity to pester the parents for a chat. In time, the child's ability to express himself will become better and better, and the parent-child relationship will become more and more harmonious.

03 Don't dismiss easily in chatting and be empathetic to your child

The fact that children can speak freely in the chat, unlike adults, is in itself a significant improvement. Some parents often like to deny their children's feelings when they chat with them, or interrupt them from time to time, saying that what they say is not right and that is not right. This practice is easy to make children feel that their parents do not agree, and do not understand what they say, the result is that the child is deflated, and the back of what they want to say is held back, becoming less and less expressive.

To avoid this, parents should adjust their mindset, not turn the chat at home into an extension of the school classroom, not easily deny what the child says without breaking the premise of the principal, and report empathy to the child.

04 Be a good listener to your child

Many parents are used to taking the lead in chatting with their children, and what should be a child-oriented chatting process has turned into a process where the parents are mainly eloquent, and the child has almost become a listener who has no opportunity to open his mouth to speak, which defeats the original purpose of chatting with our children, and one of the purposes of chatting with our children is to exercise their verbal skills?

The right approach is to let the child lead each chat as much as possible, not fight to steal the child's words, most of the time we are at ease when the child's audience is good, of course, parents in the chat can also interact with the child from time to time, active chat atmosphere, to avoid the occurrence of cold and other situations.