A Young Mother’s Journey Through Adversity and Faith

A testament to survival, faith, and a mother’s unyielding resolve amidst turmoil

The second time I learned I was pregnant, I was in a foreign country. This pregnancy was accidental. The father was a raging and abusive alcoholic. Even so, I decided to keep the baby.

In my third trimester, I started experiencing significant pain in my ribs. After a few weeks of this, my symptoms developed into pain all over my body, a nonstop migraine, and intense nausea. At this point, I decided to go to the hospital.

The doctor there told me I was experiencing pregnancy poisoning or toxemia. My condition was so bad I told the father of the baby that if he had to choose, he should save my child’s life.

One night, I got so sick I couldn’t even move. I was stuck in my bed, thinking over my life, and I had a night full of life-changing realizations.

In the middle of the night, I started desperately praying to Jesus. I believed in God, but I was not a spiritual person; I was desperate. I asked him to take away this horrible pain.

He was here, alone in my bed, that I first felt the presence of the divine.

At this point in my life, I was living through hell. I was alone in my ex-husband's country without a family or a support system. Every single day, my ex manipulated me, isolated me, and humiliated me.

My ex had me wholly trapped. Since I had my first child in his country, he had already put measures in place to gain full custody of my kids if I ever left him.

Perhaps my experience with toxemia had a higher purpose in my life. Maybe it was meant to make me so sick I couldn’t do anything but reflect on my life’s choices.

I knew I wanted to leave my ex. I knew this would be dangerous. I knew I’d risk losing my kids. I just couldn’t do it anymore. Something had to change.

These realizations made me feel like the odds were stacked entirely against me. How would I escape with my first child and a newborn baby?

In that room, me, my kid, and God, I felt this strong motherly energy wash over me. My daughter’s entrance into this world was an emergency caesarian procedure. This surgery was so traumatic for my body that I had to spend several days recuperating in the hospital.

When it was time to go home, I tried to keep the peace. I tried to pretend everything was okay — that I was okay. I felt like I was walking on eggshells. My heart was very heavy. I spent every single day trying to plot my escape.

I didn’t want to fight. I didn’t want to rock the boat. I didn’t want to make it angry.

In this state of helplessness, I started praying to God daily. I asked him to remove me from this situation. I was quickly running out of hope, and since I could see no options in front of me, I surrendered to God’s plan.

One day, a feeling of gratitude washed over me. When everything seemed impossible, I realized God had more in store for me.

I had to survive this because I was always meant to stay this.

I just knew I wasn’t done.

God never left me alone. He gave me my daughter to help me realize that I needed to take responsibility for creating a better life for myself.

Despite my challenges, I am grateful for my blessings.

Thank you for reading my story.