A Guide To Stress Free Parenting During Covid19 Pandemic

With only 24 hours in the day, it’s hard to keep your job and your kids entertained at the same time. Many of us are faced with the new reality of working from home and some might not make it out alive. Let me show you how you can make it more tolerable:

Set Boundaries

This is uncharted territory for many of us, with no commute, no separation between work and home, and no childcare. It’s time to show little Kevin where to draw the line. If he isn’t aware already, make it clear that your office is a no-go zone. Who cares if last week it was his bedroom, you need your space. It’s best you set traps to make sure Kevin fully understands the consequences of his actions. The old gags are the best. A bucket of water sitting precariously on top of the door. Or try a Home-Alone burner. Type-A achievers may now be thinking, “I can do it all!” But guess what: It’s a myth that anyone can “do” or “have it all” — and it’s unrealistic to try. Your manager may be frustrated if you’re not being honest about what you can accomplish, and your kids will be annoyed if they’re being totally ignored.

Sometimes less information is better

Instead of announcing the hours you can’t work, simply block them out on your office calendar. Culture is in your favor! Everybody expects men to knock-off early so they can meet a client. Whose to say you’re no longer meeting clients? Fake it. Make use of your calendar for some relaxing downtime. Always wanted a bed in the office? Well, now you do. Have a snooze. Extend your lunch. Finally show your partner some affection during ‘downtime’. Men who didn’t explicitly say they were heading to their kid’s soccer game, for example, were just as likely to get promoted as men who actually worked eighty hours a week. As long as you’re still finishing your work and hitting key goals, this quietly shifts your workday from the outdated idea of “face time” to what you’re actually achieving.

Senior employees should be outspoken about responsibilities outside work

Pandemic or not, high-ranking employees set the culture at most companies. Speak up. Let your employers know you want more time to complete your adulting Lego set. Or that drinking at 10am is perfectly acceptable when you’ve had a hard morning sharing breakfast with the toddler. Ensure that the people who report to you, or work with you, know it’s okay to prioritize their hobbies too. If you’re a senior-level staffer, and you want a loyal team and an accepting culture — then it starts with your actions.

Turn on the TV

This is no time to be holier than thou about screen time. Judge-y comments aside, when you look at the actual research, you see that screens can be a wonderful tool. Most importantly, don’t beat yourself up if your kids are spending a lot more time than usual looking at screens. These are not normal times. A 12 hour marathon of Doc McStuffin is perfectly acceptable. It increases your child’s endorphins. It also helps set realistic expectations of how to succeed as a doctor. In fact, research has shown that any children’s program does considerably less harm that inflicting pain on animals. Short of gagging the wee ones, it’s the ultimate weapon in silencing children.

Embrace boredom for your kids

When your kids start whining about having “nothing to do,” let them whine. There’s a lot of pressure on parents to schedule every minute of their kids’ lives, but kids left on their own to figure out an activity become more resourceful and creative, which are two important life skills. Place a tracker on the kids so you can at least tell the police where you last saw them. A mobile phone is perfect for this job. Then set them free in the house. Yes, there’s danger involved, but life is full of danger. As soon as you accept that reality — and heck, you’re living in a LOCKDOWN — then everything becomes more acceptable. What’s the worst that can happen? House fire? Broken limbs? Dead child? We’re in unusual times, anything is acceptable.

Kids also learn through playing

A Harvard Graduate School of Education research paper says parents should look for three key signs that our kids are benefiting from play, whether it’s structured or not: choice, wonder, and delight. “Choice looks like kids setting goals, developing and sharing ideas, making rules, negotiating challenges, and choosing how long to play. Wonder looks like kids exploring, creating, pretending, imagining, and learning from trial and error. Delight looks like happiness: kids smiling, laughing, being silly, or generally feeling cozy and at ease,” the paper states.

That’s right…Harvard state kids need MORE choice! That can equate to more TV channels, more website access and more roaming with weapons. They’ll be delighted to make those weapons themselves- it’s a double win! Watch the delight on Kevin’s face as he smashes another vase. Let him wonder how he’ll make it out another day alive as you invoke martial law and hunt him down. Let him choose what corporal punishment best suits his crime of disturbing you. This is a pandemic and everything goes!

If all else fails, laugh

Seriously, what else can we do? These are surreal times. I guarantee we won’t look back in 20 years and say, “I really wish I’d finished that spreadsheet faster during that global pandemic” or “I really wish my kids watched less Netflix while we were all quarantined in our house from coronavirus.” (And if those are our biggest worries, we need to check our privilege!)