Saint Valentine

Saint Valentine’s Day! Celebrated every February 14th since the Middle Ages, reflecting a tradition long known to be associated with “courtly love”, accentuating nobility and chivalry.

Chivalry, according to Lexico.com is defined as “courteous behaviour, especially that of a man towards women”.

You’ve got to be kidding me? It turns out that valentine’s day, where millions of love crazed lunatics, participate in a retail frenzy beyond comprehension to prove their love, is solely rooted in men being courteous to women. Seriously? Could the bar be set any lower? Obviously, this day was created for all the under achievers in the world.

This revelation, without a doubt, epitomises the indignation so rightfully felt by many fueling the anti-valentine flame. The trailblazers who initiated the “anti-valentine day” movement of the last century deserve to be placed on a pedestal and adorned with a gold crown!

To this day, Valentine’s day, the primitive ritual, continues to be observed in every elementary school classroom around the world. The pain and agony inflicted on all children equally deserving of love, snubbed by the ridiculous choosing of the King and Queen of Hearts and disappointment of not receiving the ever so precious valentine day card. The never-ending fabrication that coupling equates to true happiness.

Let’s just pause and think about 'coupling' for a minute. If you were to survey one hundred, no, one thousand people and asked them if they have ever been in a relationship that disintegrated at some point or another, the answer would be YES! Absolutely Yes! Coupling, for a large percentage of the population inevitably ends, and for most, not amicably.

So, is love just a myth? A tortuous parable created as a cruel joke re-enacted every February 14th for all the love-sick puppies out there. As a singleton I relish in the respite from the insanity of it all! Pink hearts, chocolates, flowers, and the over-indulgence in trying to prove love for one another. Shouldn’t proof of love last more than just one day? Shouldn’t it be 365 days a year, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week?

As Paul McCartney declared “you'd think that people would have had enough of silly love songs”. Right? Maybe it’s time for a major over-haul. Saint Valentine, consider yourself dumped! I am breaking up with you and guess what, it really wasn’t that hard to do! In your face, Neil Sedaka! To quote Demi Lovato, “Sorry, not Sorry”.

Saint Valentine, there are “New Rules” in this game called love. Although the traditions and customs of years gone by evoke familiarity and comfort for you, try as you might to convince me to reunite, “We Are Never Getting Back Together” as Taylor’s Swift recently reminded me. You’re so Vain! I am done with bad romance! Stop lingering, I am moving on. You may want me to stay, but “you can’t always get what you want” as so eloquenting lyricized by the Rolling Stones. So long, Mr. No Good!

I will survive without you Saint Valentine! Gloria Gaynor said it best, “at first, I was afraid, I was petrified. Kept thinking I could never live without you by my side. But then I spent so many nights thinking how you did me wrong. And I grew strong.”

With the support and encouragement of my love tribe, “I learned how to get along”. Although I may stumble from time to time, a huge shout out goes to “The Bebs – Love Yourself” for reminding me of all the times you rained on my parade and made me feel small. No more!

As I embraced the power of self-love, it was like I had the “Green Light” to be “Dancing on my Own”. Now, maybe it is time for you to “Go Your Own Way” because “loving you isn’t the right thing to do”.

Saint Valentine, this designated celebration you fabricated is nothing more than a charade. I am done! It’s over! To commemorate this colossal milestone, I curated this “anti-valentine” playlist especially for you. Now remember big “boys don’t cry”. Bye, bye, bye!

For all the singleton's out there, gender assigned or not, I leave you with my thoughts on why these particular songs made my anti-valentine playlist.

Silly Love Songs - Paul McCartney

When I listen to this song, the word “silly” just seems fitting when it comes to describing love. Really rather silly to think that loving someone else is the only way to true happiness.

Sorry, Not Sorry – Demi Lovato

Being true to yourself is never something to be apologetic about. Living an authentic self takes courage and that is nothing to be sorry for!

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do – Neil Sedaka

It’s true, breaking up can be hard. But life goes on and sometimes the break-up is the best thing that could have happened. It opens up all kinds of doors and that is an exciting place to be don't you think?

You’re So Vain – Carly Simon

I think we all carry a certain about of vanity. Knowing it and doing something about it is totally different.

Bad Romance – Lady Gaga

Haven’t we all had a bad romance. The secret is to survive, move on and learn from it!

You Can’t Always Get What You Want – Rolling Stones

Relationships are challenging. Our hopes and desires don’t always materialize. Move on and find something else that makes you happy.

Mr. No Good – Bombargo

Haven’t we all had a Mr. No Good in our lives at one point or another. Someone who had us wrapped around their finger like they knew that they would. Well, so long, Mr. No Good. Good riddance!

I Will Survive

This song just says it all! Relationships come and they go. Ultimately we are all capable of surviving on our own.

New Rules – Dua Lipa

No matter what life throws your way, you always have choices. You define the rules you want to live by.

We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together – Taylor Swift

When a relationship ends, getting back together, although as dreamy as it sounds, would just be the stab in the heart that you just don’t need. Take control and look for greener pastures! There out there, belive me.

Love Yourself – Justin Bieber

Sometimes you just need a reminder that some relationships are poisonous and limit your ability to be yourself. It’s a reminder that family always has your back, no matter what.

Green Light – Lorde

Love bites. Don’t wait for permission to move on when the relationship no longer feels right.

Dancing On My Own – Robyn

Being a singleton is the best thing that ever happened to me. To be able to dance/stand on your own is really, really powerful. Embrace it!

Go Your Own Way – Fleetwood Mac

Letting go is part of the process. Although going out on your own is scary, it is also very liberating.

Boys Don’t Cry – The Cure

Break free from the chains. Create your own path. Hitching on someone else’s wagon won’t bring you to joy you deserve.

Bye, Bye, Bye – NSYNC

Saying good-bye to anything that holds you back from being the best version of yourself is totally okay!