Light Up The Sky

This is my response to Chloe Rose Violet's Song promt. You are supposed to pick a song, and tell your own story through it. At least that's the interpretation I took from it. Maybe you will find your own! This is her original post if you would like to check it out.

As for me, I chose a song called Light up the sky.

By Wooli, Trivecta, and Travis Stapp. Here is the link.

This song is a song that resonates with me deeply, and no matter how many times I listen to it, it still evokes tears. If you haven't heard it before and need a little inspiration, I really recommend giving it a try! I find it was a much more emotional/deep experience, playing the song along as you read. Hope you enjoy!

~*~

"I'm tired, I'm lost,

I'm lonely and counting the cost."

I have made some serious mistakes, I'm exhausted, and driving myself crazy from trying to understand why I made some of the the choices I did. But I made them nonetheless, and I lost both of you because of it. And now, I don't know what to do with myself, because the only identity I knew with my adult self was 'Mother'.

"Shooting star, fall down and take me, I've betrayed myself long enough.

I can't give up,

Just breathe in,

I know the change has to come from within."

I have spent so many years looking for the answer to fixing myself, outside of myself. And I have not given myself the credit where it is due, and so, many times, I have sold myself short. When all this time the answer has been right inside of myself."

~*~

"So light up the sky,

Bring it to life,

Nothing's forever,

Just moments in time.

Let lightning strike,

Let thunder cry,

Nothing's forever,

Just moments in time,

Moments in time."

I am learning the importance of being present and in the moment. The past is the past, We can't change it, we can only appreciate and be in the now, and make better choices, for a better future. But what is important, is being able to be present in the moment, through the good times, and the bad... through any storm. Because these are moments we will never get back.

"In a world I don't know,

Don't be afraid,

Stay in control.

An Ocean of clouds,

I can't see now,

Release everything that's holding you down."

This world can be a cold an unforgiving place, sometimes I feel like I don't belong. And not everything is always as it seems. So I have to learn to trust myself. And I need to let go of my guilt of loosing you, because it is the only hope I have of getting you back into my life.

I tried to publish this once and they did not approve it, probably cause of the word count. I'm kinda close!!!

I guess to summarize this song is to say that I really am tired. I'm not lost, but I'm not quite found. And even now, I am recognizing ways I am compromising myself. Maybe not quite like before... But enough. Enough that it's time to stop. It is time to stop not believing in myself, and doing stupid little things to keep subconsciously holding myself back. And it is time to stop looking for answers outside of myself. Because deep inside I know what is truth. I just have to be brave enough to see it for what it is and pursue it.

Thanks so much for reading... this was an emotional piece to write, But also very cathartic. Thanks Chloe!