It's My Life

With most break-ups comes some heartache. Love hurts. But for Bailey, it was utter and complete devastation. It was more than just the pain of a shattered heart, it left her mind lost and her soul empty. Breaking up is hard to do.

Love Hurts by Nazareth

It was a cold December night when Josh tossed her bags in the street to make way for a new victim. Of course Bailey couldn't see it that way at first. She held on to false hope, after all, that is what Josh instilled in her for years. The relationship she fought so hard to keep was never real, never true. Love stinks.

Love Stinks by the J. Geils Band

It would take Bailey months to pull herself together, months to even want to realize life was worth living and moving on would be the best thing that could ever happen to her. People would tell her to let go but there was so much pain inside that as she began to heal, all the new and positive emotions simply surrounded a bed of hatred. She held on to the deceit, balling it up, storing it inside. But still, she was moving forward.

As her life took on a fresh start, she could smile again, she could laugh freely on the outside. But what people failed to see was that she was bitter, not against all men, just Josh. Amidst her newfound happiness she would remind herself daily of the tainted love.

Tainted Love by Soft Cell

She could no longer sleep. Her mind was too full of contemplations. She found it difficult to look at men with any sort of light despite not wanting to be that way. She analyzed every word said to her, every glance that came her way.

She despised Josh for taking so much from her, especially her trust and her want and desire to love and be loved. She would find herself driving past his house shouting inside her head, "I hate everything about you!" It was this kind of behavior that made her question her novel happiness. Was it just a facade?

As Bailey worked through her turmoil, she learned new insight on how to overcome her doubts of happiness. She learned the most important thing is to love yourself, because if you don't love yourself first, there is no way you can truly love another. It would only create an unfair love.

She learned to appreciate her time with other single ladies. That appreciation would soon turn to a love and passion. Girls just wanna have fun. Being single and free enabled girl time with friends, something she knew nothing about because Josh never allowed that.

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper

Bailey was a pretty woman, a sort of uptown girl. It wasn't hard to attract the opposite sex. In fact, she was amazed with how easy it was. Still unsure of what she really wanted to find, she set out on a journey powered by self love. As long as she had that, she could guard herself.

At times, she wondered if she was too cold, too hardcore, fighting against opening up to anything that would leave the possibility of heartache. She wondered if she could be complete without love from another. But she kept going, getting stronger everyday.

A Woman's Worth by Alicia Keys

She became a firm believer in a woman's worth and settled for nothing less than the respect she deserved. The happiness that she struggled to believe in was now empowering. With that power she felt if you didn't express yourself, you could not accept yourself. So she set out on a mission to live her life for herself and whatever came along the way, she would use to her advantage. As long as it would make her smile, it became worth her time.

Bailey would wake each day and look in the mirror saying, "Man, I feel like a woman." She needed this reminder because it gave her courage and strength. She turned to music throughout the day, it gave her a high. It made it easy to revel in her freedom. She was taking on the world and loving it.

Man, I Feel Like A Woman by Shania Twain

She had men in her life. Not one man, more than one and that was okay. She did it because she could. Nothing stood in her way. It's raining men! Young, hot men who took fun to a new level for her. She compared herself to Stacy's mom. She definitely had it going on.

Her friends were living vicariously through her. She was now confident and it showed. Her personality was so positive, it was her main attraction. Life was great. She could have anything she wanted, or anyone. But it did come with a small price.

There were still those little things that she would occasionally miss and there were lonely nights that highlighted those things. She knew she couldn't make those things a priority because it would set her back. She accepted the fact that one day, those things would come along but she knew they couldn't be forced. They would happen when she least expected it.

The one thing that comes with ridin' solo is independence. Anything less of independence would be a compromise and Bailey vowed to never compromise herself for anyone so she knew she had to keep living life the way she was...as a girl on fire.

It's My Life by Bon Jovi