Reed Alexander
Bio
I'm a horror author and foulmouthed critic of all things horror. New reviews posted every Monday.
@ReedsHorror on TikTok, Threads, Instagram, YouTube, and Mastodon.
Check out my books on Godless: https://godless.com/products/reed-alexander
Stories (309/0)
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Hell Fire' (2015)
Audio! Fucking audio people! There was so much echo and feedback it was hard to hear what people were fucking saying! I shouldn't have to watch an English movie with the subtitles on! Especially one that was loud enough to be heard normally if it wasn’t for all the earsplitting distortion. Man, don't get me wrong, the dialog is solid and even natural, and the soundtrack is pretty smart too. But Jesus FUCKING Christ, wish someone had checked the levels on the god damn audio. Thought I was going to have a migraine.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Shellmont County Massacre' (2019)
I'll give them this, for an independent film that was made with zero budget, they had the right idea. Actually, for a brief moment, they bordered on brilliance. I really wish they'd seen the movie inside their movie, and developed that instead. I'll have to get to that in the spoilers, but suffice to say, it was a really solid moment in what was otherwise a generic slasher. It proves they can do better.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Sand' (2015)
All right, this movie got a bad wrap. The way people talk about it, I was expecting full blown Birdemic or even Troll 2. Okay, it was bad, but basically it was bad because the CGI was fucking shit. This is a shoe-stringer from an independent studio. I expect the kind of quality that I'd get out of Gravitas or Uncorked. AND, on the rare occasion those studios produce a gem.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'American Cult: Horror Anthology' From MHP
Seven masterful stories about the deep state, which deliver predictable, but devastatingly dark depictions of those who fought to make our country an Oligarchy, and rob us of our liberty.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Dagon' (2001)
The movie was awful and campy and tropey as fuck! AND IT WAS FUCKING AMAZING AND I LOVED EVERY SECOND OF IT!!! My god, seriously, stop what you're doing and go watch this bizarre shit show. Make a fucking riff party out of it! Get a couple bottles of booze, some good friends, order pizza, SIT THE FUCK DOWN, and watch this movie.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Signal' (2007)
Yeah, it was pretty entertaining, being just on the horror side of horror/comedy. It's a lot like Yellowbrickroad in many ways as it's a slow descent into madness. I bring up, Yellowbrickroad a lot and for damn good reason. It's one of the best examples of cerebral horror movies. Check out the review below.YellowbrickroadANYWHO!... back to "The Signal." It just gets wackier and wackier. Yeah, it's really bloody violent, and people are marauding around killing each others, but it's not simple or unhinged like The Crazies, it's almost silly like everyone thinks they're in a fucking cartoon.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'White Noise' (2005)
You know, it's not a bad movie, but it's just so lukewarm compared to movies in its class. I'd compare this one to Stir of Echoes, and every time I do, I'm just going to end up saying, watch that instead. We can pretty much cut to the punch line here. Everything this movie does, Stir of Echoes does better, just with fewer shameless jump-scares.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Let the Right One In' (2008)
My God, this movie was both heart warming and terrifying at the same time. Look, if you lack the maturity or IQ to realize that Twilight is garbage, watch this movie and it might help you understand why. And by the way, liking Twilight does count as a mental deficiency in my book, fuck what you think...
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Perfection' (2018)
MY GOD this movie was agonizingly tense. From the first scene, they just gripped your nerves, and refuse to let go even during the moments of ease. There might be a break in the on-screen tension, but you are ever aware of its lingering presence.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Xtro 2: The Second Encounter' (1990)
This movie is so forgotten I practically had to do a deep web search to find a watchable copy. Seriously, just try to type it into the regular search and see if you can come up with a watchable copy. It won't come up. In fact even major horror fan pages don't mention this movie in their "complete list" of Alien themed movies. I have the distinct feeling this was a straight-to-video production. It took me forever just to find a bootleg copy that wasn't dubbed in some language I don't speak. When I finally did find one, the quality was so poor it was almost comical. Kinda like watching scrambled porn. The recording was clearly from an old VHS and the auto tracker kept popping on the screen in Spanish. If you know what either of those things are, you probably had some pretty kick ass horror movie memories like me.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Intruder Within' (1981)
Look at that retro 70s-80s VHS cover art! Look at that hammy rubber monster mark. That shit was straight outta Fangoria! And I thought Xtro II was hard to find. Again I had to use an alternative search function to pull up the IMDb archive page, and even deeper to find the full movie (which had subtitles in three different languages). I kept getting error messages trying to bring the page up on IMDb. It's probably so deeply archived there's some lone external hard drive somewhere that likely had to power up when their server tried to get the info.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror