Bill Codi | Gypsy Blogger
Bio
Star-crossed artist, closet singer-songwriter, open clairvoyant, INTJ, type O-, aspiring corporate sellout. A lil bit country. A lil rock & roll. I was Wednesday Addams before it was cool. I am Jill’s wasted talent.
Stories (13/0)
Seizure Dreams
April 5th, 2024: Another seizure dream. I had four partial seizures throughout the night. Probably one, or even two, tonic-clinic seizures. Feels like I’ve been hit by a semi. This dream was elaborate. It elapsed over the course of the night and continued where it left off over and over again.
By Bill Codi | Gypsy Blogger22 days ago in Journal
7 Stages of Grief
The 7 stages of grief. I hate when other people are right. About anything. You think, “Maybe this once I can avoid the know-it-alls and the lectures. Maybe I won’t have to stare them in the eye and admit they’ve just made light of the catastrophe of my lifetime and turned it into the Scientific Formula.” Darwin’s theory in action. There used to be 5 stages of grief. Then, “that guy” had to expand on the ever-expanding philosophy of philosophy that turns everything into an infinite question about semantics and reasons why. Let’s have an existential crisis for lunch this afternoon, shall we? The one thing you hate to hear, especially when you don’t want to hear it, usually turns out to be the root of truthfulness and the first step to healing. The spoken word closest to your truth that will ever exist is the one that hurts to acknowledge; a bad sympathy gag reel. Some cheesy advice guru’s cliché self-help quote must be running on a teleprompter floating right above my head. Eventually the sympathy stops coming, if it ever was offered. What is left is a wounded, dying animal in the woods who was abandoned by the pack. Really, I can’t blame them. Even animals in the wilderness can smell decay before it substantiates. When bad things happen to you, or around you, the people in your life distance themselves. You become contagious. As if the ugliness in your life is a cancer that will spread to all those who dare to come near. As if your tragedies and traumas will rub off when you bump into them. I don’t believe most of us realize we do that, but we do. All of us. I can’t harbor anger toward my loved ones who opted for self-preservation. Like a friend once told me, a former friend, “The world owes you fuck all”. He’s right about that. The world doesn’t owe me anything. We owe it to each other to stick together when someone can’t get back up on their own but we don’t. It’s every man for himself in this selfish, disconnected world. Even the word “friend” means something different depending who you ask.
By Bill Codi | Gypsy Blogger6 months ago in Humans
My Epilepsy Journal Part 2
I worry. A lot. About how I’m going to pay my bills now. Compulsively cleaning to keep my mind off of the reality that I cannot drive anymore. I am a stagehand who cannot work in hazardous environments. I am a rigger in training who cannot climb or work at great heights. Essentially, everything I depended on to survive and thrive isn’t an option anymore.
By Bill Codi | Gypsy Blogger7 months ago in Journal
Suddenly Disabled: Extended Version
PLEASE SHARE this story. I find myself in the heat of a battle that is every person‘s worst nightmare. My message is an emergency SOS not only for my home, my kids, and my own wellbeing but for every FAMILY IN NEED. Outside of Chicago, in the rest of the state of ILLINOIS, the majority of residents are experiencing economic crisis and job shortages. Little to none of the tax dollars we pay are being used to help our own citizens, not-Chicago residents, or fund repairs and community development to support our townships. NO STATE, COUNTY, PRIVATE, or PUBLIC SECTOR has emergency funds to HELP those who are truly, desperately in need of it. For the elderly and disabled, LIHEAP applications won’t open until October 2, 2023. I just received a letter from AMEREN ILLINOIS, a SHUT OFF NOTICE for September 8th. I have a few days to find assistance that simply isn’t available in a broken system that was not built to accommodate the disadvantaged.
By Bill Codi | Gypsy Blogger7 months ago in Journal
The Radiant
In the land of milk and honey not so long ago, in a land not so far away, there lived a young woman ripe with the glisten of life. She was tall and willowy like the forest trees. Her hair black as Mississippi River soil and as long as the river channel. A child of the land. She was a reflection of the earth that gave birth to her, the sun that forged her skin, and the moon that guided her soul to this world. The light of her spirit could be seen from every village, like a star breathing life into all things, shining love and warmth upon everything that surrounded her. Beautiful she was but naive to the ways of man and ignorant to the laws that governed their world.
By Bill Codi | Gypsy Blogger3 years ago in Fiction
Dear Mom
May 2020 Dear Mother, Here’s $400 cash for grandpa’s account. It will still be two weeks or so until I find a place to move. Maybe longer. I have several more leads to follow, numbers to call, applications to fill out, and legal documents to collect. Under the circumstances, for any landlord or seller to approve a lease application I will need proof of identity theft, copies of FBI reports, copies of communications from Cyber Crimes Unit, bank statements, court orders, anything else I have proving why my credit is in ruins, and a streak of damn good luck and damn good people.
By Bill Codi | Gypsy Blogger3 years ago in Families
How COVID Impacts Children & Families
Letter to District School Board: There’s an important issue I need to address. Before I begin, this new program is hurting all of our children, not only my daughter. The system implemented by the district is designed to benefit stay-at-home mother‘s and people who have the luxury of childcare. I’ve spoken with you several times. Begged for other options. My daughter was only four weeks old when I had to start my own business. It wasn’t a luxury. It was something I had to do because I could not find work or childcare. My girl has an IEP, ADHD, PTSD, a developments delay, and a learning disability. She needs special attention. Attention I give my best effort to give her but I am not a teacher. I don’t have the tools or knowledge to give her the education that she needs. Her beautiful mind it too complex for me.
By Bill Codi | Gypsy Blogger3 years ago in Families
Roadhouse Ranch
My Story: Hallween, year 2020. During the five years since my move from Chicago I continued to make a living from home by learning dozens of new skills and adapting to a market very different from what I was accustomed to. When you have kids, no family, no childcare, and no money you have to think outside of the box to put food on the table. The demand for cloth diapers dwindled and we had to start over again.
By Bill Codi | Gypsy Blogger3 years ago in Journal
My Brother’s Eulogy
You are a shooting star, brother. Your soul blazed brilliant. Fire and light illuminating the horizon, branding your memory on the hearts of all who witnessed. The stars that shine the brightest, carving streaks in heavenly canvas of night, in a flickering moment of awe fade out of sight.
By Bill Codi | Gypsy Blogger4 years ago in Families
