I'm a writer who enjoys studying different schools of thought, such as Philosophy, Theology, Sociology, and Psychology.
She's Into Silence
If you would, imagine a world with no one on it but you. Could be as big as our moon, or the moon itself, and there you are with a terraformed lawn and an anti-space dome to keep all that oxygen those trees are giving you. It's great we upgraded our technological advances for this scenario, because space droids go and find frozen water in the cosmos to keep you in fresh supply, minus the radiation and possible lifeforms. So it's just you, your home, and silence. Does that scare you? Knowing all the sounds you hear are your own could be jarring. I personally find it uncomfortable, in a good way. Part because I know I'll always be on the "lookout" for any indication that I'm indeed NOT alone, and other part: I'd be completely satisfied being judgeless for x amount of time.
Let's say, for the sake of argument, I self diagnose as "insane". A videogame told me once that the "definition" of "Insanity" is "doing the same, exact thing over and over, with the intention, hope, or belief that a different result will occur". I would then have to conclude that I adhere to this method of thinking and thus, there is a pattern I have found to be the "end all, be all" of tactics, my "Ace in the hole", even when the white rabbit dug so damn deep.
Instincts, In a Sense
How many people do you believe lied to you when you asked for directions to a specific location? The common answer would probably be the question of why someone would lie about directions in the first place. It's wise to keep thinking that way, but let's explore the hypotheticals. Say the right way was always left, but out of confusion or some other decision, someone told you "go right at the stop sign, you can't miss it". You don't "know" the right answers the first time around, and you're kind of forced to go and "find out the truth" for yourself. Now under normal circumstances, you end up getting more lost and you ask again, this time getting more details and landmarks to seek to ensure you don't get lost again. Now imagine you haven't left your bedroom yet. Who do you think you were talking to?
For the longest time, I've struggled with completing stories. I have no quarrel with long works, but the procrastination always felt like an emotional blockage rather than simple "writer's block". I've been doing self-research, or researching all the pseudo-science and "facts" I can about the particulars of my character, and I've come to find a new paragraph is written whenever I look into my own world for a bit. Sometimes I could get lost for days in pursuit of my identity; a dozen tabs ranging from astrology to the practices of "chaos magic" line my tabs bar from a few weeks at a time before moving on to the more practical things like work, relationships, and hygiene. I often forget too soon the joy I had finding the contents that aroused my suspicious nature. I longed for a narrative that gave me the freedom and wonder of googling for hours about things "related to me". So when I first came across Vocal, I didn't think I'd really be able to hop in and start making money, but it turns out I can, just nearly half the revenue per 1,000 reads.