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You Don't Have To Be Slim Or Look A Certain WayTo Enjoy Sex And Relationships.

by Carol Townend 2 months ago in body
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Accept the person, including their weight and flaws before you jump into bed with them.

You Don't Have To Be Slim Or Look A  Certain WayTo Enjoy Sex And Relationships.
Photo by Dainis Graveris on Unsplash

When I dress, I often look a little slimmer than I actually am. My body can be deceiving. I'm about 4ft in height, with a DD-G chest (depending on the shop that I use!). I have an apple tummy and chunky arms. My tummy is round and plump, it is certainly not washboard or skinny!

Men and women come in different shapes and sizes. Some are packed with muscle, others are thin, and others are bigger. The important thing to acknowledge is:

We are all human. We are all different; not just in personality, but in body shape too.

It is a sad world when sex or the thought of being sexy is only reserved for those who are slim. In my bisexual world, it is mostly the men who react this way.

Men! Please wake up!! Wouldn't you prefer the women that you have sex with to be able to enjoy their bodies and enjoy sex with you without feeling judged or like they have to change themselves?

I have nothing against slim women, however, I do feel for women when they are made to feel that they are less than perfect just because of their body shape. In fact, I tend to go for women who are of different shapes and sizes, just as I do with men.

For myself, there is no bigger sexual desire than desiring someone for their bubbliness or personality. This is hotter in bed than just shape! A man or woman who can just love themselves as they are and enjoy being with me is enough to get my juices flowing.

We live in a world where there is far too much focus on body shape, in the media, at the gym, through celebrities, fitness magazines, models etc. This in itself has created a world of people who now believe that they have to be thin to either get someone in bed with them or even worse be loved.

Being healthy is important, as is fitness. However, most couples you see on dating shows on television are slim or muscular, sending out the wrong message to the younger generation themselves.

They are sending a message that says:

In order to be desired, you must have a certain body type.

This is wrong and unrealistic.

Real love and dating are not based on body shape. Real human beings in the real world, desire people for who they are; not just what they look like. Sexual desire between two people can be sparked for many different reasons other than just being a certain shape. A bubbly personality, an attractive smile, a friendly face, and a caring nature can all spark sexual feelings between two people.

Sex is not just about looks or shape. It is two people coming together and wanting to be intimate with each other because they like or love the person they are with, and this should be based on more than just body type.

In the real world, we have real people. Not all real people are slim, while on television or the web, they have the technology to make a person look however they wish. We are not all 'perfectly shaped.' We are thin, athletic, built, plump, tall and short, and we have freckles, pimples, spots, flab, loose arms and other flaws.

Sorry to disappoint you, but this is normal life

. It does not mean that we can't enjoy sex simply for the sake of liking someone for who they are.

The thing is, many people do not look the same in reality as they do on television. Make-up, camera tricks, and lighting can all make a person look very different to what they look like off-screen.

I used to wear make-up and costumes for dance shows. Make-up covered all my skin flaws, while costumes pulled in my stomach. Many dancers look different on stage. Often, when I got dates or boyfriends, they would see me naked or with no make-up on. They often looked the other way after that because I revealed the truth.

As we grow up, we age. We do not look the same forever. We also have accidents and medical problems that can change us forever, and we can suddenly develop a disability.

Next time you jump into bed with someone or decide that you want a partner for life; be sure that you are happy to sleep with them whether thin, plump, flabby, spotty or not; because if you have based your desire on their build or what they look like then you will be disappointed and cause the other person a lot of mental pain when the 'mask' comes off.

body

About the author

Carol Townend

I write about many issues, including mental health. I also write fiction including sexual fiction for the filthy community. I don't believe in sticking to one niche!

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Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

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Comments (1)

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  • Paul Stewartabout a month ago

    Bravo! Excellent points well made! The media, the Internet and society in general has a lot to answer for! I couldn't agree more with what you said! I will definitely be reading more of your work.

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