satire
Politicians provide us with all of the comedy gold. We're only mere curators.
Second Stimulus Check is Coming
Alexa play Rihanna "B*tch Better Have My Money"! Alright everybody things are happening in Congress; things are finally happening. Apparently the second stimulus check has been approved, even though it should have been the tenth or eleventh check but no one is keeping track I'm sure. Is it going to be $600 (so disrespectful but are we surprised) or $2000 (less disrespectful but still rude). Let the fight between House and Senate begin. Is that how it works? I'm a millennial so I wouldn't know, shout out to my American Government teacher.
Merry Christmas, You're Fired.
Do you sometimes feel that, with the world tumbling in on us all, there's a very real lack of candour in our dealings with the powers-that-be? Here, at the Department of Social Scrutiny, we feel the same.
Beyond The Red Hat
Written by H M Hines December 12, 2020 Artist - BlackStar If you have a Bootlicker on your holiday shopping list, and we all seem to, you may be stressing out how to get them the perfect gift. Whether it's your uncle, the armchair constitutional law expert, your coworker and resident QAnon groupie, or your brother’s new knock off Tomi Lahren girlfriend, we all have that one person with whom we have so very little in common with on every level, that gifting is nigh impossible. If you picked the wrong name out of the Secret Santa drawing this year and are stuck scrambling for a gift for someone you’d sooner give the finger to than a present, have no fear, we have you covered.
SNROCINUTAFPublished 3 years ago in The SwampA Farewell to Harms
Dear President Tump, I am writing to you to thank you and wish you all the success that you deserve in your future endeavors. You have helped to make this a greater nation and I mean that with all sincerity. I agree with you on the argument that God wanted you to be president. Everything is part of some grand scheme, even the unpopular things. And on a smaller scale, how better to find out that fire is hot than to burn oneself? I am going to write about a few things that this country would never have truly known about itself had you not been elected to be the leader of this great nation.
James S. CarrPublished 3 years ago in The SwampGOP Furious Over Turkey Election Fraud - Declare Cobb the Winner
"Hi, this is David Allen at WNPD News and we're bringing you the Presidential Turkey Pardon ceremony at the White House Rose Garden which will start any minute. Of course, there is also the issue of Cob Turkey, the Republican nominee, who still refuses to concede and is holding onto the belief that he was really the one who won the Social Media Election. Now, we'll join Daniel Levine who's there with the celebrants. How's the atmosphere there Dan?"
Natalie Frank, Ph.DPublished 3 years ago in The SwampCOVID-19 Turned One Year Old
Happy birthday you crazy girl, you so wild. Our dear friend COVID-19 turned one year old. They grow up so fast. In this one year, COVID-19 has shown us that the government does not care about us (wow shocker I know right), other countries know what they are doing (wait so we're not the best country in the world?), and that money has no meaning.
THE OXYMORONIC TIMES
New Disease Plagues New World Order Future Overlords Ask "What the FRAS?!" You may be one of many adults worldwide who have been exposed to lethal levels of chronic bullshit, putting you at risk for developing Forced Reality Awareness Syndrome or FRAS.
Althea VeritasPublished 3 years ago in The SwampWhat’s Worse Than the Boogeyman?
I don’t know if my American brethren of a different hue truly hate people like me, but the idyllic institutional constructs created to share the dream of our founding fathers is steeped in systemic racism and economic oppression that my American dreams has been nightmarish.
Charles C. CampbellPublished 4 years ago in The SwampA Man Like Jim Tanner
Jimmy shuffled his feet on the floor of the headmaster’s office and rearranged his hands. Not happy with that configuration either, he shifted it again. His hands couldn’t find a happy way to sit on his lap. Absently, he kept at it.
Tom MartinPublished 4 years ago in The SwampThe Child President
Little Don Gold was a big town resident, living with his mom and dad; he told his mom he wanted to be President... he said that would make him glad.
Dennel B TyonPublished 4 years ago in The SwampMAYDAYS
MAYDAY 1818: SATURDAY, OCTOBER 10, 2020 URANTIA FIRST Do help me help Art. Help me help him to get us, to save ourselves. A puzzling mystery, this poem, penned by George Washington and since handed down — president, to president.
Miguel VeraPublished 4 years ago in The SwampThe Hope for American Democracy
As she opened her eyes, the brisk air filled her tired lungs. She wiped the eye crusties off and remembered that she hadn’t removed her mascara and bright crimson lipstick last night. She looked across the room and her roommate, Evellynne was passed out on the emerald velvet (faux velvet) couch with her stick-straight purple hair hanging in her face.
Sara SublettePublished 4 years ago in The Swamp