Where Everyone Knows Your Name…

One of the reasons why I have never chosen a life of crime was because I am one-hundred and twenty-five percent sure I’m not built for jail. I’m short, non athletic, and ever since my 🤯, I get overstimulated easily so the constant chaos would kill me.

Anyhow, anywho, how’s it goin; how are you? This blog has been brought to you by an intrusive sunrise 🌅, ice water, and a Sativa Expresso Caramel 🍬 but MiMi is tired this Mawnin.

I would be remiss if I didn’t tip my hat 👒 to my fellow members of the Cannabis community and didn’t wish everyone a Happy 420!!!!

Let’s be clear , 🌱 is my medicine and as I have stated several times in many blogs, I don’t enjoy being “high” or “out of control”. But I DO enjoy being pain free and content, so depending on how I feel later I may step out and smoke a Raw Cone filled with Cookie Face 🤷🏻‍♀️ .

I may or may not do that later, but for NOW I’m going to tell y’all the story of how I understood how Norm from Cheers felt each time he entered the infamous bar. The issue with me being lauded is that I wasn’t entering a bar, but a “behavioral health facility” .

Rewind ⏪ back to part 1 when MiMi told y’all she tried to harm herself and was being transported to a behavioral health facility to get better. It was in the middle of the night, so for all intents and purposes the place was quiet and there were just a few employees and clients meandering about as the loud ambulance and EMT wheeled my gurney into what I assumed was a reception area.

I had stopped crying by then and was anxious just to get some sleep. I remember speaking to a few people, answering a myriad of intake questions and the general consensus at the time was to get me back on my medication regimen and provide me with some necessary coping skills along with therapy so that I could go back home.

After the intake, I heard someone very excitedly yell “Heeeeey! I know her! She was in one of my classes at school!!! She did a play for class and she wore a blue wig!!!”

😳

Cautiously, I raised my gaze then eventually I lifted my head to see a woman in a room across the hall smiling, pacing, and pointing at me.

Apparently she recognized me from college. In hindsight, I suppose that’s flattering. Even as a non-traditional student, I feel the best I had ever looked was when I was an undergrad. 🤭🤣.

Oh but the absolute horror and embarrassment I felt at the time being recognized at a behavioral health facility by another patient, who now has told any and everyone who would listen how she knows me from college complete with a reenactment of part of the play I did as part of my assignment.

And I didn’t remember her, at ALL 😳. Not even her name. 🤦🏻‍♀️ But no worries MiMi, you would have plenty of time to get to know her because she was, in fact,my roommate. 😳

I 💩 you not, I was told for the duration of my stay “Marie” would be my roommate.

“Marie” is not her real name.

My face exploded upon hearing those words. And what I mean by that is apparently hearing my new roommate situation triggered me to start crying and my sinuses decided to shoot snot and tears out of my face at the same time. 🤦🏻‍♀️ And I would bet my life that I also let out a squeak sounding reminiscent of a dog’s chew toy.

It was the squeak of defeat. 🤦🏻‍♀️🤣

The staff who was in charge of my intake at the time must have deciphered every bit of distress that was expelled in my squeak, handed me a packet of tissues asked me if I smoked.

Staff then guided me over to another door, took out some keys, unlocked it, handed me a Newport. He opened the doors we stepped outside into a courtyard and walked over to a picnic table where he then lit my cigarette. I thanked him. I don’t remember his name either, but he shall be named “Kevin”. Kevin explained he “kinda always” had extra looseys for us as long as we didn’t over-do it with the asking. He also had my file with me and was reading it over when he whispered a cuss word under his breath then looked at me.

“You had a brain aneurysm rupture?”

I nodded while blowing smoke out of my nose.

Kevin was still reading the file and asked with a surprised undertone “And you’re an English Professor?”

🙋🏻‍♀️⏸ I know this was many years ago but I don’t ever recall telling anyone what my occupation was unless it’s listed upon intake 🤷🏻‍♀️.

I dunno why Kevin askin me that made me more emotional but it did. And he noticed, so when we came back in the building and Marie began waving frantically calling my name and asking me about the college class we had, he immediately interceded and guided her away from me. Another staff member took her to get “cookies”.

It was at this point I giggled and thought to myself…

…I can’t make this stuff up. 🤷🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️.

For whatever reason my giggle triggered Kevin and he laughed and shook his head before taking me to my room.

“Ima give “Marie” her meds so she’ll be good and sleepy by the time she gets back here. This way she won’t keep you up all night. And if she thinks you’re sleeping, she won’t try to talk to you.”

I sat down on the bed, nodded and yawned. Kevin handed me a paper cup with my Rx and a mini bottle of water and said he’d see me in the morning.

And it WAS EARLY!!!

I’m saying that with emphasis because have you ever seen a show where someone is in a a really dark room and then the door opens flooding that room with light and you get a shot of a person squinting???

Well that person was ME , 🤣but “Marie” did not budge. As a matter of fact, her snoring got LOUD.

😳 then, in hushed tones, Kevin came in and said “grab all your stuff, someone is leaving now and her roommate left already, so you will be in a room by yourself, is that ok?”

*** all giphs courtesy of GIPHY

So I swear I heard the theme from “Mission Impossible” in my head as I was moving rooms.

And later that morning when we entered the common area for breakfast and upon seeing Marie, I kinda waved and smiled at her. But the look Marie shot me was one of betrayal . 🤦🏻‍♀️🤣

This was day 1.

Later on that week, I was hit on 🤣 and I’ll tell that story too, but until then…

✌🏼💜💨

Peace Love Exhale