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When Confidence Becomes Arrogance

Confusing them can ruin a life. Here’s the difference

By RabihPublished 2 years ago 3 min read
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There is reality, and there is an interpretation of reality.

There are two ways to understand.

The first one is by sticking to reality — the facts. Guts.

The second one is by interpreting reality — surrounding the facts with ideas. Mind.

When something is obvious, we don’t discuss it — it’s a fact.

When something is confusing — we speculate.

Give enough time to speculation, and it becomes a belief.

Give enough speculations, and different beliefs are born.

Give enough beliefs, and the world becomes divided.

Paris is the capital of France. It’s a fact.

Everyone goes to heaven. It’s a belief.

No one derives a sense of stability out of Paris being the capital of France. There’s no need for it.

Everyone derives a sense of stability from different beliefs. And that’s why everyone fights with everyone else. If beliefs are threatened, people’s foundations are. Who would they be without those “handpicked” speculations?

Do we believe therefore because we don’t know?

If our sense of stability and rootedness into the world is created on the weak foundations of speculations — isn’t it obvious that we’ll keep fighting each other to protect our worldviews?

When we face an irrefutable fact, there’s no need to fight. Everyone just accepts it. No one speculates about Paris being the capital of France.

But when something’s not so sure — not an irrefutable fact — we feel the urge to give it a meaning, and this meaning becomes our source of stability.

That’s why we have to defend it. That’s how we become arrogant. We believe in speculation. We want others to believe in this same speculation. The more people, the truer it feels — and the more secure we feel.

We know this. But a reminder is always good.

Confidence isn’t loud. Arrogance is.

We’re confident when we know. Facts.

We’re arrogant when we assume we know. Speculations.

It’s okay to pretend that we have all the answers at first, to fake it until we make it.

Let’s just not take our games too seriously.

Whatever the area of your life in which you feel you need more confidence — accept it as it is first.

Next, find the source of the lack of confidence.

Are you trying to live up to someone’s expectations? Are you comparing yourself to people who worked really hard to master the craft? Are you believing in some false ideas about yourself someone told you in the past?

Whatever it is we're trying to conform to, it comes from something we've accepted from the world around us most of the time. We need to truly take a look at all those 'sacred cows' within us.

It must come out. And once it does, you find how absurd it is in most cases, and it’s over. You won’t need to believe in something. You’ll have the facts laid out. The circus is over. No need to buy into lies anymore.

And this is confidence. You’ve got nothing to prove. You’re just okay with where you are. And it feels damn good to live with clarity. From this place, you can now build a healthier existence. And pursue whatever it is that you want.

The world has wasted too much of its time trying to be right about its speculations. It made us more arrogant. And arrogance clouds understanding.

Instead of being a ring for ego fights, offices are supposed to solve problems.

We need to be a little more humble. It’s okay not to know everything from time to time. We can’t know everything anyway. It’s fine. That’s what it means to be human.

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About the Creator

Rabih

I write about spirituality, not only to inform but most importantly to transform.

https://linktr.ee/Rabihh

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