Thick and Thin

True Friend

Thick and Thin

We knew of each other for years before we became friends. Two hood chicks from Mt. Vernon, New York. Me from 3rd & 3rd and you from 7th & 3rd. Both us known for getting that paper!

It was 2009 and we was both locked up doing a bid. I was on my way up north, thankfully you ain’t have to go up. We became so close during that bid. That’s when we became Sista’s.

As soon as I saw you when I got home I noticed the change in you but it was kinda minor I figured. But as the years passed you fell deeper into that never ending pit of intoxication. Even still I would defend you to the public. I had to really put my love for you aside and look at the true picture.

Even though I wouldn’t turn my back on you, I see why people feel how they do about you. Your a sweet person deep down. But when you on that dust, k2 and alcohol you’re a different person.

I wish you would really take a look at yourself, a clear headed look. I hate seeing how far you’ve fallen. I try to help as much as I can but shit I’m struggling too sista!

This COVID-19 pandemic got everyone tryna stay afloat. And tryna stay free on top of that is struggle enough. Don’t you miss the old you sista, I do! Everybody does.

I know you be carrying a lot of pain in your heart. You always say to me it’s like everyone just turned their back on you. Don’t ever feel that way. Stop dwelling on who not rocking with you no more. You still got me and a lot of other family and friends who still got ya back.

Even though when you twisted you be buggin out, I hate that you really struggling right now. But that’s what be pissin me off with you. You won’t got to a program and you know they’ll help you with housing. You rather sleep in the streets because you don’t wanna stop getting high.

On some real ish sista, now isn’t the time to be constantly lost in a cloud of smoke and sleeping from pillar to post. This pandemic is real and people are dying. I’m scared for you.

On top of all that every time I turn around your fighting somebody. Cowardly men out here putting their hands on you over shit you probably should’ve gotten ya ass whooped over but still. And don’t think I’m coming at you because I’m really not. I just don’t know how else to get through to you. I feel like we’ve run out of options. I hate even saying that because it sounds like I’m giving up on you. But you already know I’m not that type. I would never turn my back on a friend who needs me. So pray, meditate, chant or do whatever you gotta do to get the old you back. And when your ready to take the steps towards getting back to you, I’ll help as much as I can......

To Be Continued...

People say addiction is a disease. In a way that’s true I guess. I mostly feel like addiction is a trap. Easy to fall prey to but hard as hell to get out of. Sometimes it can take years to break outta that life. Addiction is a topic that sparks many emotions and opinions. In my opinion any struggle is harder when your alone. I wouldn’t ever suggest turning your back on someone, especially if you love or care about them. I would suggest being completely honest and upfront about your boundaries. Just show you still care.

Janita Robinson
Janita Robinson
Read next: Never In the Cover of Night
Janita Robinson

See all posts by Janita Robinson