The Narcissist vs The Empath

She spread her wings and flew the nest. On the track to college where she knew things would be different than her small town. She had a bright future ahead of her, she could feel it deep in her soul. She was loved on campus for her beautiful spirit and contagious engery. She took risks, she made strides, she was happy.

She took classes that challenged her core beliefs growing up. She was awakening to a world that had been covered up by forced religions and ancestral beliefs that were passed down through generations. Feelings she carried that were not her own. She was still young, not even in her twenties yet. She did not have the tools for the darkness that was coming...

She met a man that was in her classes. She was excited, someone that shared the same interests as she did. He was charming and amusing. She did not hesitate to open her heart and soul to him without delay. This is what he wanted, this was his plan.

Her self awareness began to fade. Her focus was solely on him now. She began to disassociate. Disassociate from her passions, her friends, her clubs, and sadly disassociate from her soul. The gaslighting began as his insecurities came to the surface. She did not know this at the time, she was still awakening to the darkness this world held. She did not know that sociopaths, narcissists, and psychopaths walk amongst us every day, let alone be in a college and not a prison.

The first time it happened, he came at her like a freight train. Tackling her to floor. Unable to move she screamed for his roommate. However the roommate never came. She was in complete and utter disbelief that this was happening. “You made me do this,” he screamed in her ear. “I saw you talking to that guy in the quad, you’re such a whore.” As he put his hands around her neck, she gasped words of apologies, saying anything to calm his rage. After what seemed like forever, he got off her and went to the kitchen. She gathered herself and followed him there. Still apologizing for the “mistake” she internalized.

You see the violence doesn’t immediately start. The unknowing soul is baited with love bombing, an uncontrollable lust and desire is created and the trap is set. The soul falls into it and is constantly seeking a way to get the normalcy back, constantly trying to fix what never was to begin with.

The weeks went on and the rages now became normal. She was finally ready to leave. He was not going to allow it. He pinned her down, she bit and clawed, finally freeing herself. She jumped out the window, fleeing to her car, he ran after her. She knew if she could just get to her car she had pepper spray and would use it. She sprayed his face and fled the area. She was back to her house when the cops showed up. They took a little black book from their pocket and wrote down her statement. The next words were forever in her head, “place your hands behind your back, you are under arrest.” She buckled at the knees how was this happening to her, she was the one being abused.

She never spoke to him again. The darkness was not gone, she now adopted it. She became toxic. She covered it with drinking, anything to not feel. The second dui happened, this time the judge through the little black book at her. Little did she know, this was the beginning to her awakening to find herself. She became sober, and learned to love herself. She became involved in what she loved again. Her self awareness was strong and continued to grow.

A few years passed, and finally she was whole again. She fell in love with a man who was completely opposite of what she had been with before. It was perfect. He showed her what true love is suppose to be. He took care of her in every way, mentally, physically, and financially. He was successful. He gave her all the money she ever needed without a clause or hesitation. The large sums of money was nice sure, but what she really valued was the peace she had finally found.