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The Long Term Effects of Bullying

And just how badly it can screw you over during adulthood.

By Stephi DurandPublished 4 years ago 3 min read
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Images from Pexels

Bullying. We've all heard a multitude of anti-bullying slogans and campaigns, how the act — whichever version of it you may think of — should be stopped.

If your school experiences were anything like mine, then bullying prevention went along the lines of this:

  • They preach anti-bullying, stating they'll do everything they're able to, to prevent it.
  • You go to someone about said bullying issues.
  • They do their part, which is usually the bare minimum.
  • The bullying resumes, but usually somewhat worse because you told an adult.

The sad reality is that for most places, the bullying isn't dealt with, and it never seems to end. Especially given how easy it is with the internet. Anyone can say anything they want, and it's always a damn sight easier when you're behind a screen.

But what we're here to talk about today, isn't bullying prevention. But instead, what some long term effects can be for someone who has dealt with essentially half a lifetime of it.

I will be using some personal experiences, things I have found difficult to do, even after leaving school six years ago. All to hopefully reflect some light onto why people really shouldn't be a dick from time to time — or ever, that would be better.

1: Eye Contact

You mean to tell me, I'm supposed to look at people when they speak to me? You also expect me to believe they won't try to intimidate me or simply make me feel worthless?

Eye contact plays such a vital role in adulthood. Interviews being the top priority.

How am I supposed to convince someone I'm the perfect person for the job when the slightest bit of eye contact reminds me of how easily I can feel inferior?

2: Confidence

While I may have written a Vocal post on how to be confident, I still have to refer to it from time to time to remind myself that I can be confident — even if I have to fake the hell out of it.

I constantly doubt my skills, my abilities, and even the things I enjoy. I easily become embarrassed over something I enjoy, simply because I'm afraid someone will mock me for it, and ruin it for me.

I once had my entire class laugh and make fun of me for liking a particular show. This didn't just last that day either. It was on and off by some people for most of that year.

So just how am I supposed to be confident and proud of myself now, when I've not only witnessed but quite literally experienced how easy it is for a room of 20+ people to turn on you?

3: Anxiety

My anxiety and I aren't in the best place right now. And sadly it's effecting part of my life in a way I truly don't enjoy.

I'm too anxious to leave my house alone.

I can't imagine walking to the end of my street (Which I am very close to), let alone a five-minute walk to the shops by myself.

It terrifies me, I don't feel safe, and just to be sure, I get an anxiety attack too.

Being near/around groups of teenagers makes me extremely uncomfortable. But that's not to be unexpected given it was that age-group who enjoyed picking on me.

4: Friendships

I'm god awful at making friends. Part of me doesn't see a point given they could all turn against, and abandon me at any time.

The only possible upside to this is knowing the very little group of friends I have actually want to stay in touch with me.

We have to at least try to find the good in the bad, right?

I could go on, listing a few more points. But the truth is, I wanted to write this out so I could see in words just what bullying did to my quality of life. I know that not every element is to be blamed on bullying, but sadly, an awful lot of it was caused by it.

Life can truly suck at times, and there are people who can make your life hell. It's awful, and I've even left jobs in the past to escape it.

But when possible, do good, be uplifting for others, anything that helps remind people that there is good in the world, and it definitely still exists.

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About the Creator

Stephi Durand

Indie Author | Content Creator

'Look Up' is available to purchase at all online book retailers in Paperback and eBook.

Writing here, writing there, writing everywhere...

Instagram: @stevie_dd

Twitter: @StephiDurand

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