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Self-Harm: The Silent Addiction

The Self Help Guide to Recovery

By Katie RolesPublished 6 years ago 3 min read
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What comes to your mind when you think about Self-Harm (SH)? Do you know someone that self-harms, or knew someone that did, or have you yourself battled through the hell that is Self-Injury?

The definition of self-injury; Non-suicidal self-harm/self-injury is when someone deliberately cuts, burns, scrapes, punches, or bites their own skin to calm an emotional pain or severe anger.

Self-harm is most common in early adolescent years and can lead into young adulthood. What causes self-injurious behavior is still unknown, but the leading cause is depression, and other mental illnesses/behavioral issues. What causes someone to want to self-harm, could be a number of things; low self-esteem, extreme sadness (depression), losing a good friend, the loss of a loved one, a bad break up, and bullying are just some that come to mind.

Now, you may be reading this and wondering who I am, and why I am writing about such a sad subject. Well, let me introduce myself. I'm Katie, a young adult (23) that has battled the godless hell that is self-harm. I was a cutter for 12 years, battled (and still am) depression, borderline personality disorder, and other mental illnesses. I have personally been SH free for 3 years. I will bore you another time with my life story, I will now get to the next section.

What to do when you see someones self-harm; I don't mean actually catching someone in the act of hurting themselves, but more along the lines of seeing someone's scars, cuts, or burns. Ask them if they are okay; never make a joke about what they are going through. You may not understand self-harm, but you have to understand that no one just wakes up one morning and thinks about hurting themselves. It takes months, sometimes years of emotional pain for someone to consider to start engaging in self-injurious behaviors. I will take you through 3 steps of what to do when someone you know is self-harming.

Step #1: Always make sure they are safe. If you are a parent/guardian of someone who is going through this, make sure you know they are safe. Never leave them alone when they are battling self-harm unless you know that there is nothing that they can harm themselves with. Be wise, they can use pretty much anything as a tool for self-harm.

Step #2: Always listen; self-harm is not a ploy for sympathy. When someone engages in the act of self-harm, they are battling something more sinister than what is shown. Remember, we can't see what is going on in their minds, only they can. Always make sure that they know you're not there to pass judgement. Let them know you're a safe person to come to for help.

Step #3: Find them help; search the web for different places in your area that helps people with self-harm and other behavioral issues. Make sure to let them know that it is okay to get help from an outside party. Don't let them feel ashamed of asking for the help they need to get on the path to recovery.

Now that I have told you three steps of what you should do when helping someone that self-harms, I will take you through the steps of what you should not do.

Never pass harsh judgment on someone who self-harms; this can lead to feeling more ashamed, sad, and angry. Which can lead to another episode of self-harm.

Never tell someone to "just stop"; just like in the previous statement, this can cause more negative emotions that can lead to more self-harm.

Show compassion to someone that self-harms. Let them know that it is going to be okay, and that it's okay to find the right help for them.

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About the Creator

Katie Roles

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