PTSD in Family Life

When I was 24 years old, I decided to make a change in my life that would lead me down a completely different path. I was a single mother of two boys. I was living at home in my parent's house, working two part time jobs just trying to get by. I was wishing for anything that would allow me to provide a good life for my boys. I decided to go back to school, and become an Emergency Medical Technician. My first time through the program I had a hard time focusing; I ended up not making it past my midterm and had to start the program again. I worked harder the second time and managed to pass everything leaving the program with an A, and feeling really good about myself. I managed to land a job right out of school, with a private ambulance company, that handled emergency calls as well as general transport for the hospitals. I loved it. I was making good money in overtime, and was finally able to save up enough money to move out on my own with my boys. A year after I started working in EMS, I met the man I call my husband, he is a paramedic with 14 years in EMS and has seen more things than I could even imagine. We used to work on an ambulance together from time to time, and between the strokes, gun shots, abuse calls, codes, calls for children, and so many more bad calls, we still managed to make it through the shift. EMS isn't for the faint of heart, you have to control your own emotions for the people you are trying to help. There are those calls in EMS that will forever stick with you. The faces of those that you just couldn't save, that you just couldn't help, that you wish you could of done more for. Almost every EMT and paramedic in the field, no matter what town, state, or country they are in, suffers from some type of PTSD. Trying to manage a home life with a spouse and children while dealing with the effects of PTSD is a challenge within itself. Most EMS providers won't even admit that they have PTSD, or they will say they have it under control. I would know, my husband suffers from PTSD every day, and still tells me he doesn't have it. I have been woken up in the middle of the night to him screaming from having a nightmare of a call that still haunts him, or from him screaming a patient's name repeatedly and telling them in his sleep to stay with him. There are days you can see in his face that something has him looking back in those memories, those memories that could be triggered from anything as simple as something that is being said to something that was just seen on TV. Even on medication the effects of PTSD can still be seen in many EMS providers; effect such as burn out, distancing themselves, and sometimes even aggression towards the people around them. PTSD isn't something that should be taken likely, it should be addressed, and those suffering from it should seek help. Friends and family members of all EMS providers should be made aware of the signs and symptoms of PTSD, and should offer a safe place for EMS providers that may be suffering from PTSD.