Over Time, the Narcissist Exposes Himself and Is Publicly Seen for Who He/She Is

The best thing that you can do is stay far away from narcopaths. You will rebuild yourself while they tear themselves down. Focus on you. They are headed for disaster.

Over Time, the Narcissist Exposes Himself and Is Publicly Seen for Who He/She Is

Narcissists and psychopaths lie. They are reliant on the reactions of others to feel alive, be relevant, to exist—they talk continuously. When they are not interacting and getting reactions (supply) from others, they are irrelevant. Think of a phone without a battery in it. That is how they feel. A sense of nothingness.

The combination of non-stop talking and pathological lying sets them up to expose themselves. Since they operate with magical thinking, a mode of thought used by children during ages three to five, they are unable to anticipate the reality that people eventually become suspicious of them.

People who initially found them to be charismatic, intelligent and engaging later feel, creeped out, uncomfortable, irritated or disgusted by them since they lie and constantly, their stories do not add up. People begin to wonder why they have constant problems that do not reach resolution. They grow tired of their tales of woe and painting themselves as victims. Normal, integrated people feel "dirty" by their smearing of other people.

Narcopaths maintain a strong mask or series of masks by changing their locations, homes, jobs, social groups, and partners. They have long, complicated stories about why they move from one situation to the next. Often, it is the fault of some third party. Something someone else did landed them in the situation they are in now. People get tired of hearing the victim stories. People begin to realize that the person they blame for their situation is often the person who they target. People eventually distrust them, then fear them.

When they fall out of favor in one location, they move onto the next. When they sense a group of people are not fooled by them, they move on. They plow through their options and eventually run out.

People talk. When they take advantage of one member of a group, other people react. When they burn bridges professionally, word spreads throughout the industry. People are reminded of them due to their presence in numerous places, groups, industries, friendship circles, and congregations. They are remembered as being in places for brief moments. They are not taken seriously and viewed as being chaotic, all over the place, failing in one area and moving onto the next. People roll their eyes, twist their lips, almost whisper and brush them off. They are spoken about in the past tense.

"Oh yes, he was in town a few weeks ago. He hit up Jon for a place to stay for a month. John can't stand him. He knows he's a user. He told him that he rented his flat out to his other friend."

People are weary of them. Embarrassed for them for how many times they try to take advantages of others. How their glib charm no longer works. How the truth behind their stories is out... yet they keep lying. People cringe at how brazenly they ask others for favors when the people they are asking want nothing to do with them. People learn that they have failed in numerous situations and have moved onto a crowd that is new, foreign, not "in the know" or naive.

When they blame their situation on others, people simply do not believe them. As they fail in one group, job, situation or community, those members speak. Word travels. Eventually their long history of blaming, using and failing is common knowledge.

You do not have to try to expose a narcopath for who they are. In time, they expose themselves. The very best thing that you can do is move far away from a narcopath and all his/her flying monkeys. The further you move away from them, the faster they collapse. Without you there to mirror, imitate, borrow the reputation of and moderate their behavior, they are left to manage themselves. While you move on, stabilize, regain your positive energy, feel alive again, they are left spinning. Eventually they spin right off the rails. Make sure that you are far away from them when that happens.

personality disorder
andrea wainer
andrea wainer
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