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Opening Back Up

Opening Back Businesses and Self

By From the Mind of NobodyPublished 3 years ago 5 min read
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Over the last two weeks, we are slowly getting back to “normal” life as theaters, restaurants and other public venues, are opening back up due to COVID-19 restrictions being loosened up just in time for everyone to enjoy the summer. Last week there were Juneteenth celebrations held outside and with the upcoming 4th of July holiday (in honor of the Original Illegals, aka the “Founding Fathers” and the Declaration of Hypocrisy) will surely bring about more festivals, outdoor activities and chances for people to come together.

I’m sure there are a lot of you out there looking forward to going to your favorite bar, nightclub, or just hanging out at the pool. I am not one of them. I prefer the pandemic lifestyle because it closely resembled my lifestyle of isolation. Staying closed in with my family was great, even though my wife worked at home, seeing her all the time made me happy and helping my son with his virtual school gave us time together (by the end of the school year we shared a hatred of 3rd grade math). You have to admit the pandemic life wasn’t that bad; it saved lives (see Mom and Dad, all that time you said I was wasting my years staying cooped up in the basement playing videogames wasn’t worthless), virtual school and working at home meant you could sleep in and still be on time for work ( don’t lie….working in your pj’s was awesome) and if you had to go out, getting around was a lot more bearable (it was the first time I’ve ever been able to go to Wal-Mart and get an actual parking spot in which I didn’t have to worry about getting back to find it like Indiana Jones in the Temple of Doom). Now don’t get me wrong…I’m not anti-social by nature. I’ve always tried to meet people and be engaging. I’ve been told (by more than one person and on more than one occasion) that I’m sweet, funny and a good listener. I’ve had an awkward discomfort and almost anxiety levels of dread when meeting people for a long time. I think I make a good impression but not a lasting impression. Growing up, I had kids I would hangout in school but very (very) few friends outside of school. As I’ve gotten older it’s pretty much the same thing but replace school for the workplace. The best example I can give was my senior prom, when a group of us (guys and girls) plan to go as a group and have a good time. We all planned the times for the one person who could drive to pick the rest of us. So, on prom night, I’m sitting in my living room all excited and ready to have fun, just wanting to see the car pull up to enjoy this milestone in my life. About 30 minutes past, I was still waiting and excited. An hour had past and I was still waiting but not as excited. After 2 hours I was done waiting and just devastated. No one called me, this was before everyone had cellphones but we all had home phones (in which no one called mine and the number’s I had the others already left). The following Monday, I talked to one of my “friends” in class and after I told them nobody picked me up, offered an apology but said they just forgot all about me. They just forgot about me like Thanos snapped me out of existence. I already felt bad about not going to the prom but not going because my “friends” forgot about me was just a kick to the nuts. It was confirmation that I didn’t belong anywhere, that I was the real-life Invisible Man, that I was the exception of “no man is an island” …that I was truly a nobody.

Now I understand I’m no longer a teenager. I’m a grown man with a wife and kid so these feelings of isolation should’ve gone away. It’s true, my wife is my best friend which is kind of funny since I met my wife shortly after moving to another state to reinvent myself and be more adventurous and meet new people. I love them dearly but they add a new dimension to my situation, especially being a father because I fell like I’ve gone down in the pecking order in term of relevance. To best explain, think of the Jackson family. My son is Michael Jackson, everyone loves Michael Jackson, his songs are known to everyone on the planet, and everyone will sell their soul to go see Michael Jackson in concert. My wife is Janet Jackson, everyone loves Janet Jackson, her songs are known to everyone on the planet, and everyone will sell their soul to go see Janet Jackson in concert. I am Jackie Jackson; you probably don't know who Jackie Jackson is (he was a member of the Jackson 5 and had a solo career after) no one knows a single song (Stay off his 1989 album Be the One) and no one is coming to pay real money to see Jackie Jackson in concert.

I know I’m not truly alone. I know that I’m not truly insignificant. I have a wonderful family (wife, son, parents, siblings, nieces, nephews, cousins, in-laws, etc.) that love me. When I’m with them; I’m truly happy and at peace. To some of you, all this won’t make sense and all I can say is …it doesn’t; emotions are not logical (according to Spock). We all react differently to situations and all we can do is fell what we feel. You just can’t say “just get out there” or ‘cheer up.’ and it’s all fixed. There maybe some of you that can relate to what I’m saying. You understand that you can feel the loneliest in a crowded room. As everything is opening back up, I’m going to try and open back up and get outside. I’m going to try to make some connections and have some adventures. Some adventures I’ll have with my family and some I’m going to try to have on my own. Maybe I’ll make some new friends, maybe I won’t but I’m going to try. I’m just going to try a little at a time, one day at a time (or maybe over other day) because the one thing I’ve learned from the pandemic lifestyle is that first and best adventure is to step out of your comfort zone.

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About the Creator

From the Mind of Nobody

The whimsical, unusual and sometimes brilliant rantings on a variety of topics, from comics to sports, from a complete nobody with nothing to say.

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