On the path (8/23/21)

Sometimes you get caught up in life. The weight of the world tends to hit hard. You start to worry. Can't think. It's these moments that you will seek balance consciously, unconsciously, or both. You'll seek balance physically, emotionally, and spiritually. It's easy to get lost if you're not careful.

I did.

I got lost in taking care of everyone else, and ignored my own needs. I lost so much of myself that I was no longer me. People noticed. I was not who I used to be....I was way different. I now know that I'm an empath. The energy that was being perpetuated by us both was affecting me emotionally and spiritually, and was having a negative impact on my physical health.

Thursday was my wife's birthday. The day before that was the 10 year anniversary of my father's death. But....I made the right choice this time. I didn't resort to self medication. I resorted to meditation and sharing reiki.

I made sure to wish my estranged wife a happy birthday. It felt odd....I didn't want to appear desperate and smother her, but also wanted to let her know I was thinking about her. Later that night during meditation, I shared reiki with her and our marriage. I make sure to do this nightly, not for selfish reasons, but to help her and I heal.

For years, I resorted to drinking as a way to address my stress and issues. It was my way to get rid of the anxiety and pain at the time. It eventually killed off a piece of me, and I became something I didn't want. I was unhealthy physically, mentally, and spiritually. What was once something my wife and I did to pass the time and connect over, eventually was our undoing. The anxiety I thought was being addressed was only exacerbated.

When she left me, I hit rock bottom. By reaching out to a friend, I was able to heal myself through reiki. There's still more work to be done.

Today during my morning meditation, I saw a tree spring to life. It was vivid...I could have touched it. It was amazing. I'm still trying to understand the message I was sent through this vision. As I understand this vision currently, the Tree of Life is growing strong. It is growing within me, and is continuing to grow within us as a collective spiritual body. I am certain that a spiritual awakening is coming...beautiful and peaceful...and that soon we will have a new Earth. It is up to us to nurture this tree...this awakening...and share healing and love with all who need it and welcome it.

The tree kept appearing to me throughout the day. At the moment, I'm sure that this is because of the spiritual revolution that is coming. I'm also confident that the tree has another meaning that is not yet known to me. I can't help but be attracted to seeking the entire meaning of the tree.

The intent of this journal is to serve my highest good. In sharing my experience with you, I intend to share the light that guides me and continues to heal me with all who need healing. My intention is to share my experiences in healing myself spiritually, mentally, and physically. In so doing, I can help others as well. I pray this journal and its succeeding editions guide you to a healing path of your own. With love and gratitude, thank you for reading. I look forward to the next time we meet.