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On the difficulty of interpretation

examining gaslighting & other microaggressions

By Arsh K.SPublished 3 years ago 6 min read
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It is not easy to posit a reason or cause when faced with misfortune, even if the degree is relatively minor. The term gaslighting has been used to describe what in college campuses are occasionally referred to as microaggressions. The way these are treated tend to range from outright dismissal, as is often the case when the perspective which deems it such may have confronted rather more direct or abusive forms of violence. Or they are incorporated into what is commonly understood as the culture of a campus or milieu.

The trouble with the understanding of such occurrences is that they are not expected from the people they come from. Usually, colleagues, neighbors, and sometimes even friends and family - and this is what makes them difficult to swallow.

The animation of a response seems to be, at least peripherally their only notable objective, and yet - in the face of this, we often glean clues as to how we are seen in the form of the aggression encountered, much like racist abuse is indicative of how a culture may see who they deem to be an outsider.

Boredom, and a lack of purpose - does unfortunately appear to be what their proximate causes are, along with of course - envy and other forms of resentment which are habitual in a people. I believe it is important to confront such encounters at this stage because the unknowingness of both parties often conceals the possibility of any kind of agreement or reconciliation.

It is important to register the kind of space in which these occur. Communicational and social networks are not always public, and as with any form of closeted communication, regulation becomes an issue when the acts that pervade such phenomena are not brought to the light of day.

The difficulty that some, including myself have found in putting these happenings into words is the fact that we do not have with us as of now a register which they very easily fit into. These, for the most part are not acts of harassment, sexual or otherwise - yet the line that separates them from falling into such a register is probably one of degree, and not kind. By this I also mean that they are less motivated than the latter, and often instigated by an unfamiliarity or insufficiency in the outlook of one's own sentiment.

What is clear is that these are never interpreted to be acts of compassion, and those of us who have lived through years in colleges are aware of the ways in which racism, and other kinds of communal sentiment, not to mention questions of class and belonging, can discreetly make their presence felt in encounters.

What perhaps is a more dangerous development is when such practices, if these may be called, or rather, become that - become a part of the professional landscape in which people work.

I am inclined to think of microaggressions as points in our societal fabric where effective communication, either within a subject, or between others breaks down - and this lacunae creates a predisposition to express themselves in other ways, perhaps not unlike the way a dog pees on a lamp pole, not really out of any necessity but to mark turf and ward of other canines. In other words, such symptoms - if they can be thought of as that, underline antagonism which may already be animating the field yet have not been adequately, or should I say formally expressed publicly on a platform of some kind or the other.

Here, I must say that I do not believe that the confines of a clinic, nor disciplinary action such as sending a kid to the principal's room, or even a scolding from the class teacher or parent sufficiently addresses the cause. As stated earlier, this often happens during free time, recess, breaks, lunch, or the leisure hours of the evening - and serves very little apart from creating local impressions which are usually negative between proximate partners. This is of course, when they do not escalate into something more damaging, like a fight, argument, or other form of confrontation.

The relation between work and leisure here, as implied above is crucial to understand. Leisure, as is commonly understood as the way in which an individual or society relaxes, unwinds, in other words, allows themselves to rejuvenate and approach the day ahead, is a facet of any culture - and human societies have a way of using stories to do this, in a variety of forms, be it cinema, books, games etc.

They offer an affective respite from the tasks that are usually assigned at a workplace, from the encounters that we deal with, from acquiring necessities, keeping our places clean, to mundanities such as clearing the mailbox. More importantly, they are moments when we are able to reach out beyond our immediate confines to people and places that we may not encounter in our day to day life. A reminder and eye-opener of the vastness of the world we live in, which also allows us to reflect on and place our own position in it. This, I do not think is very dissimilar from understanding, the kind that arises between two people, or even within oneself.

If I were to try and find a precedent to such kinds of behavior, it is easy to point to period dramas such as John Osbourne's legendary Look Back In Anger - an explosive piece with captures the antagonisms and hardships of domestic relationships. The trouble is - life is often not as dramatic. How does one confront this then?

A beginning, and this does begin with oneself - is having a sense of who we are. And often, in society this is defined by what one does or is doing. Enthusiasm, in a gainful pursuit breeds motivation, a sense of purpose and this does allow us to situate ourselves vis-a-vis others. It also creates a ground for the possibility of a common understanding. A businessman, a scriptwriter and a personal trainer all have their own lives, desires, motivations and drives. As people, we also have anxieties about what it is that we may lose, even if it is as trivial as a sense of pride or place or even face. Having a grip on what you are doing reassures yourself, and those around you that you can be trusted, if nothing else, in the pursuit of the task at hand - and perhaps this is a beginning of understanding, when conversation and dialogue fails.

There is no easy remedy for the kinds of anxieties social groups have for each other, and often their concerns are very real, such as the relevance of my profession in the coming world, the means of my livelihood, the wellbeing of my family and friends, health, retirement, old age. Society has evolved to provide us institutions which are able to confront some of these fears yet they require us to approach them, to work with them, and perhaps via this - to come to terms with each other. Much easier said than done, but as Ernst Bloch once wrote "I am. We are. That may be nothing at all, but it is enough and we have to start."

humanity
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