Losing Your Rights at the Loony Bin

I had the unfortunate experience of being locked up against my will in a psychiatric institution. Here are the series of events that led up to that incarceration. Yes, that's what I call it as that to me is EXACTLY what it was. I was put in a room (cell), held against my will, and had my freedoms taken from me. I was threatened with longer term incarceration for being quiet, which I was told was my right to do so, for dropping a cell phone four inches onto a padded chair and more. If you do not think for one moment that the under-privileged and minorities, mainly our black and brown (darker-skinned) brothers and sisters can be and are mistreated, THINK AGAIN. If I as a PRIVILEGED, WHITE WOMAN WAS and can be treated this way JUST IMAGINE how minorities can be treated by those who have prejudice in their hearts.

It was a Wednesday in May, a few years back when I went to Holy Spirit Hospital to look into an intensive outpatient program for more intense therapy after learning that my unemployment checks would no longer be arriving leaving me with ZERO income. My therapist at the time suggested the additional therapy to deal with the added stress.

During the course of the inpatient program you meet with various therapists for different activities and you meet with your psychiatrist (med Dr.). In Therapy 1, I was pulled to meet with my psychiatrist and during the course of our conversation she asked me if I was still taking the 10 mg of prescribed Valium at bedtime to help me sleep. Being the honest person that I try and claim to be I answered "yes" and told her that over the course of the prior five days I had exceeded the recommended dosage (taking 100 mg each day), but had been fine. I walked, talked, drove, attended church, had witnesses blah, blah, blah. She told me that she could no longer prescribe it for me and I was basically like "DUH", I could see that coming. All appeared fine, she dismissed me, I left and returned back to group.

At the second group (just as at the first) I alerted the therapist that I would not be returning for the afternoon as I had important appointments that needed to be tended to. Besides, I had not even committed to the program. I left at lunch to go about my afternoon errands and appointments and a few hours later received a call from an unknown number. I let it go to voicemail. I then promptly listened to the voicemail and it was my psychiatrist calling to advise me that it was urgent I get in touch with her. I phoned her immediately and it went to voicemail so I left a message. Thirteen minutes later she returns my call to tell me that she was doing a "302" on me and that I had to get to Holy Spirit Hospital by 4 p.m. or the cops were going to come pick me up and bring me in [by force].

Now, for those of you who are not familiar with a "302" it is when "someone has observed your conduct and feels that you present a clear danger to yourself or to other people. Within so many hours you will be examined by a physician. If the Dr. finds that you do not need treatment you will be returned to whatever place you desire within reason. If the Dr. agrees that you are mentally ill and clearly in danger of harming yourself or someone else, you will be [involuntarily] admitted by the county administrator for a period of treatment UP TO 120 hours" (=5days). Then under my Bill of Rights it states:

"If you have been involuntarily committed in accordance with civil court proceedings and you are not receiving treatment, and you are not dangerous to yourself or others, and you feel you can survive safely in the community, you have the right to be discharged from the facility."

Here's a few things that are VERY wrong with this situation and how my freedoms as an American citizen were infringed upon.

FIRST, according to the 14th amendment the individual MUST BE EXHIBITING behavior that is a danger to themselves or others in order to be held. The hold must be for evaluation only and a court order must be received for more than very short term treatment or hospital (typically NO LONGER than 72 hours).

------------If I was exhibiting such behavior that made me a danger to myself or others why did the Dr. let me leave her office to begin with that morning and why wasn't I pulled from the Intensive Care Program of which I attended not ONE, but TWO therapy groups? AND if I was a danger to myself or others, why did my psychiatrist instruct me to operate a motor vehicle to bring myself into the emergency room? Plus, I was never given a 72 hour option it was 120 hours or longer.

SECOND, is my 5th amendment violation. I was not free to remain silent. When you remain silent they use it against you (as per my psychiatrist when I was in the hospital) as proof of mental illness and then they can incarcerate you involuntarily for a longer period of time. With each time they go back to court the time frame increases and may be increased up to 12 months and you have NO RIGHTS TO STOP IT! Research what I am saying if you do not believe me. It is all true.

* They were supposed to provide me with transportation by law to the emergency room. I was not to be transporting myself which I did.

* A Dr. MUST examine me in the emergency room. That never happened. He came in, sat on the plastic cot and stated that he agreed with my psychiatrist and they would be admitting me. THAT is NOT an examination.

* I received no papers on the "White Paper" court order that I was to receive. Probably because a court order did not exist.

* I was not given the right to an individual examiner. There are two examiners and by law I have the right to choose one of them, meaning I could have chosen my own therapist and was denied that right .

* For an EMERGENCY admission, by law, the Dr. is to have OBSERVED MY ACTIONS FIRST HAND which she did not. She was merely going by what I had told her AND I had NOT USED the day that I was in her office... just the five days prior.

* I was to have a court appointed attorney and I never received one.

* In order to involuntarily commit they have to have reason to believe that I cannot care for myself, be safe in the community or will die within 30 days if not admitted. None of which was true. Like I stated I had people to vouch for me walking, talking, driving, congregating all perfectly fine.

* It was reported that I threw my phone at the check-in nurse when in all actuality I simply dropped it onto a chair from four inches high after I was advised I would not be allowed to have it while incarcerated. People with power can make your life miserable if they want to and there is nothing you can do about it, and of course who are they going to believe? The nurse or the "crazy" person?

So, how free are we REALLY in the great United States of America? From what I experienced, your freedoms can be yanked so fast it will make your head spin, turn your world topsy-turvy and make you feel more depressed than you felt when you were free. If you did not want to die before you were incarcerated you might after being locked away as I haven't even spoken of my living conditions, but that's a separate story.

When I was "302'd" and I arrived at the emergency room this was my experience. I was taken back to the looney room. It was not padded, but it has a plastic cot-like "bed" in the middle of the room bolted down with a thin "mattress", a sheet and blanket on top. There are two security cameras to watch you in the room, a red buzzer to use when you need someone and a very narrow, approximately 3x11 glass in the door by which you have to voice your needs. When you arrive a security officer brings you paper scrubs and tells you to change into them and ONLY if you ask will they escort you to the bathroom so you have privacy to change, otherwise it is expected that you change in the loony room with an open glass on the door and two security cameras watching you. After they have taken your personal belongings and clothes they also take your shoes away from you. I was fortunate enough that my guard let me have pen and paper to which I could journal the whole time I was in there and was allowed my phone lest I REALLY go bonkers on someone. One kind nurse even charged it for me about 2 in the morning.

Then they come in and take your vitals. My blood pressure was 158/98 since I was in distress it is no wonder. No one told me I had to pee in a cup but they did take three vials of blood, which I am happy to report [and which should have been proof enough] there was nothing wrong with my blood except my white cells were slightly elevated and they concurred that was from stress. HELLO, that should tell you right there I do not need to be here. If I was committing a slow suicide, which is what they were alleging, then there would be drugs in my system.. don't you think?

I sat calmly writing for hours on end even drawing on my paper scrubs. When I finally did get up to be escorted to the bathroom no one advised me that "Hey, we need some of that in a cup" until 15 minutes after I was escorted back to my room. (I know this is TMI but I have to tell you to get my point across), I have a tank for a bladder and I did not drink nearly enough liquids in those days; generally I go to the bathroom 2-3 times a day and that is it. So when the nurse came in to tell me she needed me to pee in a cup I told her it was going to be a long wait only being honest, not obtuse.

A few more hours passed and a crotchety, old nurse came in advising me that I had been there for six hours and had not given them a urine sample. I advised her that if her staff had done their job and told me they needed a urine sample that they could have had it hours ago. She then proceeds to tell me if I do not pee in a cup they are giving me a catheter and I proceed to tell her that I will not be getting a catheter and I would like to know who and what army are going to get my legs uncrossed to give me one!?

Finally, one of the staff from crisis comes in with three cups of water... ICE WATER! I DON'T drink ice water it make me feel icky and I hate the way it feels going down, it bothers me. Ask anyone who knows me my water is room temperature and if it's too cold in a bottle I will microwave it. So I tell her this and she tells me she not running a restaurant. I wait for the ice to melt and water to warm and it is just not happening fast enough, so I proceed to scoop all the ice out of all three cups and put it on the bed... yes I was being defiant.

I was beyond pissed at this whole ordeal! I drank the water and when I STILL did not have to pee I rubbed all the ice cubes left on the bed all over my face, neck, arms, and back trying to make myself cold enough to have to go to the bathroom for these creepers. Finally after that, and walking for what seemed to be about 20 minutes in circles around the loony room, I buzzed for them to escort me to the bathroom with my pee cup in hand (can I just say YUCK) ?

The rest was a waiting game until a little after 7 a.m. [mind you I have not eaten since Tuesday nor have I slept and it is now Thursday morning.] A nurse pokes her head in the room and advises me that I should go to the bathroom so that I have a comfortable ride to my final destination. I tell her I do not have to go and she advises me that I am on my way to Philadelphia, about a two-hour ride, and the ambulance WILL NOT stop for me to use the restroom... WHAT???!!! If I was not in freak-out mode as of yet I was now. Philly? Why Philly? No one will be able to visit me there as I am sure no one is going to drive ALL THE WAY to Philly for my five-day incarceration in the loony bin and oh my goodness I do not want to be locked up with the crazies of PHILLY! My brain was definitely short-circuiting at this point.

A few moments later three people appear and advise me I am going to PPI (Pennsylvania Psychiatric Institute) in Harrisburg after I was just told I was going to Philly, thank goodness. When I no longer have a choice I get up, go out and plop myself onto the gurney. The big, fat man at my feet told me that would be enough of that and he of course received a few choice words from me that also involved me telling him that if he thought he was scary just because he was big he was talkin' to the wrong sister; he didn't scare me one bit. He then fires back that he is going to get a restraining order. WHAT??!! (He is getting serious side-eye and shade at this point.) I advise him that I know he can't do that just because I got on the gurney in a fashion that was not to his liking and that I would have to have touched him for him to get a restraining order and I did no such thing; he had no grounds.

I took my ambulance ride over to the hospital. I was informed that I did not have to answer any questions or do anything I did not want to do so I planned on being quiet and not doing things I did not want like getting weighed and so forth, however, they failed to mention; as I would later find out, that in doing so it would be held against me (as I mentioned earlier). When they went to petition the courts on my behalf they would keep me involuntarily incarcerated in a mental institution for a longer period of time using that against me then proceeding to tell me that if I "did not act up for the remainder of my stay" and did as I was told yada, yada, yada that I would get out in five days.

I then filled out paperwork and told them that on all of the days in question I spent time with people, while under the influence of the additional Valium, that could vouch for the fact that I was fine. I was not slurring my words, walking unbalanced, driving badly or suicidal. They contacted them and the statements from those individuals, on my behalf, attesting to just that, bought me my freedom so that I only had to stay 120 hours even though they wanted to keep me longer due to my "disrespectful behavior" at check-in. Honey, if disrespectful behavior landed you extra time in the loony bin there would be no space for the people who really need to be there because we would all do a little time then and again.

I did not eat for four days while I was there. I had intended to fast the entire time as it seemed the one thing I could control. By saying it was for religious purposes they could not make me eat, but the smell of food finally nagged at my hunger pangs and very empty stomach and I gave in and had dinner Sunday night after not having a bite to eat since the prior Tuesday. I received my clothes back after 24 hours and my shoes, sans laces, but a plastic grip tag to tighten them in place of laces.

When I told the psychiatrist at the loony bin that I wanted to be on less meds and that I had asked MY psychiatrist to lessen them and she would not he was very puzzled and asked why. I told him she said my regimen seemed to be working so why mess with it? That perplexed him and so HE changed my meds for me. Thank goodness for doctors that listen to the patient and allow for them to take less meds when they know what is better for them.

I will not bore you with the details of the whole incarceration; hit me up and I will be happy to share privately my other horrors.

I just wanted to make you aware of how quickly your freedoms can be removed from you and there is NOTHING you can do about it and this is supposed to be the freest country on the planet.

Think about it.

Think about who and what you vote for.

Think about not only how your vote effects you, but also how it effects others.