It comes for me quite often. Far more than is preferable, and to be frank I'd prefer it if it never appeared at all. But it does appear. It's an inevitability and that is something I just cannot abide. Good job I'm not the type to take such things in my stride. I'd wager you have no idea what I could possibly be talking about, and that's no fault of yours, so I'll explain. This entity I speak of, the one that 'comes for me', the 'it' that I have no love for in this place, is not actually anything at all. At least not in the traditional sense. What I refer to is that which would best be descibed as 'the ordinary'. The dull, the humdrum, the everyday, the norm or my personal favorite, the average. Why am I so bothered by these 'things'? Well it's simple really. I despise the unremarkable in this life and so much of living is just that. An endless sequence of moments that fail to delineate themsleves from each other, so much so that refering to them as a sequence gives said moments far more credit than they deserve and do a great diservice to actual sequences. If time is moving forward and all that's happening in this timeframe is nothing whatsoever, is it a true sequence? If a series of events transpire and I am there to experience them, and they are all as painfully unremarkable and boring as each other, is it meaningful for me to say I experienced seperate moments? Sure, a clock ticked in the background but all that happened was that I was bored. Can I use calculus in a situation such as this? If I took the integral of 'I was bored' and sliced it into smaller and smaller peices of 'I was bored' approaching a limit of infinity, was I more bored or less bored? The answer to this lays outside the question. The very act of me trying to utilise calculus to measure such a thing may not have changed 'the bored', but created something diferent alltogether. It created a moment where I was no longer bored! The concept of trying to take the integral of boredem is in itself, not boring at all and thus we have the broken the cycle. The moral of the story is: ridiculous things such as utilizing advanced mathematics on the concept of boredom my save you from the ordinary, at least for a moment. Imagine if I used a differential equation? I have no doubt it could be done but alas... my mathematics are not up to scratch when it gets to that level. So as I've demonstrated, the ordinary cannot be abolished from ones life. In fact I think such things as these to be a great motivator as the boring and the mediocre are brilliant agents of negative reinforcement. since 97% of our time falls into the realm of the mediocre, its motivates us to do something... Anything to make life the way it shoud be. Fun, Enjoyable, relaxing, interesting etc. ... Now in many ways this may lead to a life that inherently rejects the norm and the averege. A terrible job is one of the first things to remove from ones life. You could be pulling in serious dollars a year and if that factors into your decision to stay at this job and reject the opposite then I'm sorry to say, but youre priorities are wrong. No one need large amounts of money and if you think you do then you are greedy by nature, You have kids? Well, you dont need stupid amounts of money for kids either. And if you think you need loads of money for the kids youre wrong, plain and simple. Sound like something we were discuusing earlier? I'm referring to being a person this is everything Ive just disscused. You end up becoming, boring, mediocre and worst of all average... you and your children. this my friends, is the thing I fear most. Being average. And for that I'd probably need a Doctorate in Advanced Mathematics to even begin to apply calculus to this problem. Maybe it's time to enroll in University and study your Phd in some obsure mathematical field. There's hope for you yet!